


Meant To Be

by Galactic_Ink



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alpha/Omega, Angst, Drama, Humor, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, M/M, Minor Character Death, Mpreg, Rape, Romance, Smut, Violence, War, i dont know what im doing but im having fun, kingdom au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-31
Updated: 2018-11-21
Packaged: 2019-03-11 23:44:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 14
Words: 52,763
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13535082
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Galactic_Ink/pseuds/Galactic_Ink
Summary: On the day that Alfred comes of age he finds himself faced with a betrothal from the King of Owleta. With the King on his deathbed and wanting to protect the future of his kingdom, it's no wonder that he'd ask Alfred to marry his son. However, Alfred is not fond of the proposal and plans to refuse the Prince when he arrives... or so he thinks.





	1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

୨.❀.୧

Alfred sat beside his twin brother in the gardens, both silent and picking at the grass as they tuned out the hustle and bustle of the palace behind them. Everyone was preparing for their birthday, arranging flowers, ordering supplies, discussing seating arrangements. Yes, it was like any other birthday, except for one thing. Alfred and Matthew would be coming of age. They were going to be 16 tomorrow.

"Don't be so down about it, Alfred," Matthew advised as he nudged his brother.

Alfred just huffed and threw a blade of grass he had plucked from the ground.

"Easy for you to say. You are an alpha and the firstborn," Alfred said bitterly. "You get to pick your lover and rule once Father and Mother retire."

Matthew gave a sigh and put an arm over Alfred's shoulders and brought him in for a loose embrace.

"Alfred, there's nothing to be bitter about. You are an omega, but you are also my brother and a prince. I'm sure that whatever awaits for you tomorrow will be grand! If you have a betrothed then I'm positive Mother and Father have picked someone worthy of you. And better yet, since you don't have to rule the kingdom first, you get to have more fun than I do!" Matthew said with a smile. "Now come on, don't ruin our big day with your negativity. It reeks on you."

Alfred gave an offended gasp and shoved his brother. Matthew laughed and grabbed Alfred to wrestle with him. The two roughhoused in the gardens until one of the servants came out of the palace.

"Your Highnesses, the King and Queen request you both," she said as she approached them. "They are in the throne room."

"Alright, we will be right there," Matthew replied then let Alfred out of the headlock he had him in.

Alfred dropped to the ground with a soft thud as Matthew got up. Alfred grunted as he picked himself up then swiped at Matthew's legs to make him trip. The blonde stumbled into a chess table nearby, making Alfred laugh as he ran to the throne room.

"Why you little—!"

Matthew chased after his brother, but Alfred, being the taller one and able to take longer strides, always seemed to stay just out of reach. They wove around servants and pillars holding expensive art in the massive corridors as they dashed to the throne room. When they finally made it, they came to a stop at the ornate doors before them, panting heavily.

"I… win… ha!" Alfred said between breaths.

Matthew just scoffed then straightened up as he let more air into his lungs. Once they had their breath back they cleaned themselves up as much as they could, trying look like they hadn't been acting like 10 year olds just moments ago. When they finished they knocked on the door and a smooth voice that only their mother could have, called for them to enter. They stepped inside the polished marble room that glittered from the sunlight filtering in from the windows. At the far end of the room, their mother and father sat in their thrones. The pair was dressed like the royals they were, draped in cotton and silks of yellow, blue, and green, with jeweled crowns atop their heads.

"Boys, have you been wrestling again?" their mother questioned after taking one look at her sons.

The twins looked normal except for the grass stains and reddened cheeks.

"Perhaps," Alfred said with a cheeky smile.

Francine shook her head and stepped from her throne to pinch Alfred's cheek then Matthew's, making them both whine.

"Honestly you two, you are 15 and soon to be 16," she scolded.

"Oh let them have their fun, Francine," their father said with a laugh as he got up from his throne. "It's their last day as children after all."

"But Arthur—" Arthur just smiled at his wife and placed a hand on her back. She sighed and nodded her head. "Fine, but no terrorizing the servants."

Alfred and Matthew nodded their heads in understanding.

"Good. Now we have some news for you two," Arthur said and Francine nodded in agreement. "Matthew, you have been offered three hands in marriage."

"Th-Three?" Matthew stuttered both he and Alfred gawking at their parents.

"Yes," Francine said with excitement as she handed Matthew the letters they had received. "And you may pick one if you wish tomorrow. Two princes and a princess, and you will have a chance to meet them tomorrow, for they will be here for your birthday." She then turned to Alfred and handed him a letter as well, which made Alfred's shocked eyes even wider. "Now, Alfred, you have one as well, from your betrothed."

"From my _what_?" Alfred gasped in disbelief.

"Yes, and you will meet him tomorrow as well and in the coming days," Arthur said as he looked at his son. "He will be staying here for a month to plan for the wedding and coronation, as well as getting a chance to know you."

Alfred stared at his father then looked down to the letter in his sweaty hands. He took one look at the wax seal and the color in his tanned face drained. The crest depicted bears, antlers, and swords and a large "B" on the shield. Alfred knew well from his studies who he was meant to be married to.

"Braginsky…. You're giving me to the Braginskys?"

Francine gave a weak smile and Arthur took on an air of sternness.

"Alfred, you know that as an omega that you would be married off, of course I had hoped your future mate would be someone else, but a lot is at stake here," Arthur said, his tone almost apologetic. "The ties between our kingdom and Owleta are tense, even more so now that the king is on his deathbed. This is our chance to solidify peace, and perhaps open more trade between us."

Alfred stared at his father as he was spoken too, but little by little his face twisted into a grimace.

"But Father, I have heard of what that family has done and I refuse to go!" Alfred shouted crumpling the letter in his hand.

"You cannot refuse. It is meant to be," Arthur said firmly. "Ivan will be here tomorrow and you will see him."

Alfred wanted to shout and scream at his father, wanted to rip the letter apart and spit on it, but he refrained. Instead he stood there shaking with anger as tears welled in his eyes. He knew all this time that being an omega was the worst. The thought of his first kiss, his first true heat, with someone like Ivan broke his heart.

"Alfred, darling," Francine started and reached for her son, but once her hand touched his shoulder he stiffened.

"If you'll excuse me," he said coldly then promptly turned and walked briskly out of the throne room.

He broke into a full run once he was passed the doorway and ran to his bedroom. He slammed his door shut and locked it for good measure, then threw himself onto his bed. He breathed raggedly into the bedding for a second or two before screaming into it with all his might.

"It's not fair!" Alfred shouted into the bedding then slammed his hand into the bed.

_'How can they do this to me!? Why must I be the one they send?! It's not fair!'_

Alfred's mind was riddled with these thoughts as he cried into his bedding. He didn't know how long he had been like that, but when he finally calmed down he could see the sun setting in his window. He breathed deeply then moved to curl up on his side, but when he did so a crunch came from his hand. He looked to his right and noticed he still had the letter in his hand and quickly balled it up and threw it across the room. It hit his window, which unfortunately was closed, bounced back and hit his writing desk, then fell to the ground where it rolled back to the bed. Alfred glared at it then sighed and slumped back into his bed.

"Why do I have to come of age?" he asked himself. "Why can't I just be a child forever?"

He sighed again and looked at the balled up letter.

 _'Ivan Braginsky… the second child… an alpha…'_ Alfred thought then tried to think of what he could look like.

He never meet the Braginsky family, whenever they had come to Sunre to speak to his father Alfred had always been shooed away by his nanny or mother so he wouldn't make a bother of himself. He had always been energetic and rebellious, which is why he was always kept out of sight when more distinguished guests came to visit. Besides, he, unlike Matthew, was an omega and a second child, and therefore didn't have much business being around others.

Alfred tried to think of what Ivan would look like, but couldn't place it. All he could think of was a burly man with fangs and blood on his hands. Everyone knew that the rulers of Owleta where cold blooded and murders. Alfred had heard gossip of them throughout the years from servants and his own parents. The Braginsky's ruled with an iron fist and didn't hesitate to kill those who went against them. They had always been violent and unfeeling towards others. He also remembered hearing that they had a dragon in their dungeon, but Alfred knew better than to think that was real.

Alfred groaned and rolled over to be closer to the balled up letter. He stared at it for a while longer before reaching out and grabbing it. He stayed sprawled out horizontally on the bed, hanging off it just slightly, as he opened the letter carefully and examined it.

_'Dear King and Queen of Sunre,_

_I, King Mikhail Braginsky, am writing to you in regards to my kingdom's future and your son Alfred. As you are aware I am dying. My second oldest of 20 years, my only son, Ivan Braginsky is due to take my place as king, but he needs a queen to continue the family line. I have gotten requests from other kingdoms—'_

Alfred snorted to that and muttered "Yeah right." before continuing.

_'—and not one seemed as promising as your son Alfred. Since, you, Francine are a high seed and produced twins on your first birthing, I was wanting your son to join with mine. I believe the two would get along and produce fine children fit for both our kingdoms. I understand that Alfred will be of age soon and thus I am writing at this time. I will have Ivan go to the party in honor of Alfred's coming of age in my place, and I would appreciate a response before then._

_Singed, King Mikhail Braginsky'_

Alfred wrinkled his nose when he finished and balled up the letter once more but kept it in his hands. The way that the king had wrote his letter seemed so curt and demanding, when he was the one asking for Alfred. It only made Alfred feel even more inclined to refuse Ivan. He didn't want a mate that had no sense of courtesy and only took what he wanted.

"Bet he is ugly anyway. Buck teeth and big nose," Alfred said with a huff. "Maybe even fat."

Alfred shivered as he pictured the image of Ivan he created then sat up in bed. He tossed the letter once more, not watching where landed this time around, then got off the bed to leave his room. However, at that moment a knock came to his door and he stopped short.

"Al, it's me. You're favorite brother," came a voice.

Alfred rolled his eyes and moved to open the door.

"You are my only brother," he said once he was face to face with his twin.

"And that's why I'm your favorite," Matthew said as he held up a tray of sandwiches and water. "I bring you food in bed, even though I shouldn't."

"Well, you are my favorite after all," Alfred said making Matthew laugh as he set down the tray.

The two seated themselves on the bed and Alfred eagerly took a perfectly triangle sandwich in hand. Matthew followed suite, though he mostly just watched Alfred eat.

"So… Ivan Braginsky eh?" Alfred instantly stopped eating and glared at his brother. "Look, I know you hate it, but there's nothing to be done."

"I can refuse," Alfred said curtly.

"Al, you know you can't."

"Watch me."

Matthew sighed and shook his head then took a bite of his food.

"It's just not fair." Alfred said after some time. "I knew this would happen, but deep down I hoped it wouldn't, and for the person to be Ivan of all people in this world? I hate it."

"I know, I know, but perhaps things have changed in Owleta. Since the king is dying maybe they have become gentler? Ivan might not be so bad."

Alfred shoved a fourth sandwich in his mouth and chewed angrily, but calmed down once he finished it.

"I know you are trying to make me feel better, but I still will refuse. If things somehow did change over there and Ivan is nice, then I will consider it."

"You are so stubborn," Matthew said.

"I prefer headstrong," Alfred corrected.

 

* * *

*****Back** at it again with them sweet bois. If ya follow my tumblr yall know how excited I am about this fic and the discourse behind it lol I've been struggling to write for a very long time and this fic is the first thing I've felt confident and proud about! I've never been into A/B/O aus but I recently read a few fics that change my view of that au and I thought I'd give it a try. I'm still uncertain about a few things, but I'm still figuring shit out! Thanks for reading and comments are welcomed! Also thanks again to my dude, my pal, my lady in editing, Tangerine_ForgetMeNot for editing my shit once again lol


	2. Chapter 2

** Chapter 2  **

୨.❀.୧

Alfred sat in front of a mirror with a frown on his face as a servant applied makeup. He had locked himself in his room, hellbent on never leaving it, until his mother had a locksmith unlock it and servants rushed in. She had a sympathetic smile on her face as she watched Alfred being guided between his personal washroom and the bedroom by the servants.

"You can't hide from this dear," she had said before leaving Alfred to the mercy of the servants.

Thus, he sat on a bench fully dressed in formal attire and groomed for his fated meeting with Ivan Braginsky. He was dressed in clothing that hugged his body, white pants that showed off his legs and backside. He had on a baby blue vest with a white ruffle collared shirt underneath, a sash placed across his chest, and leather boots with golden buckles donned his feet. His hair was combed and numerous attempts were made to get his cowlick smoothed down, but it popped back up every single time, leaving the hairdresser irritated as he did his best to work around it. His cheeks were dusted with blush, his eyes highlighted, and lips painted a soft pink. He looked strong yet fair, a look he knew would turn heads, but that didn't lift his sour mood. He didn't want to waste an ounce of his look on Ivan, and he was going to keep it that way.

"Ready, Al?" Matthew asked as he cracked open the bedroom door.

"Unfortunately," Alfred replied and stood up as the servants backed away.

The two headed to the ballroom in silence, though Matthew still tried to cheer up his twin.

"Just breathe, Alfred," he whispered as they neared the room. "If something bad happens, come find me."

Alfred nodded, taking a deep breath as they entered the ballroom. Kings, queens, and their royal children all talked animatedly amongst one another. They ate, drank, and danced, unaware of the honored guests—that is, until Arthur stood from his throne.

"Everyone, today we are gathered to celebrate my children becoming men! Welcome, Prince Matthew and Prince Alfred!" he boasted proudly.

Alfred and Matthew put on their best smiles and waved to the crowd as they walked to their parents. Alfred didn't recognize much of anyone, but he was disturbed by a set of violet eyes when he came across them. He didn't look much at the owner of them, only averting his eyes and not trying to show he was creeped out by the intense stare. When they arrived at the thrones Arthur began to talk once more.

"This is a time of great importance for my sons, and hopefully soon we will be planning for weddings," he said with a grin and a chuckle. "Now, enjoy yourselves while the night is young!"

The room bubbled with cheers and laughter then mellowed out as Arthur looked at his children.

"You both have grown so much," he said softly then looked right at Alfred. "Alfred, I know you are still upset, but please don't run from this."

Alfred stared at his father's emerald eyes then let out a heavy sigh, his gaze dropping to his feet.

"Fine, but I will still not go willingly," Alfred informed then turned from his father.

Arthur watched Alfred go back to the crowd and Matthew just put a hand on his father's shoulder.

"Don't worry Father. He will come around. He just feels like he got the short end of the deal."

Arthur sighed and nodded his head and Matthew left him after that. Alfred watched his brother from his spot at the punch table, unsure of what to do with himself. He didn't exactly feel like partying anymore, or greeting others. No, he felt more like kidnapping Matthew to have fun on their own. However, that idea was dashed as a tall dark skinned woman with wavy dark brown hair approached Matthew. She bowed her head as she introduced herself and Matthew had a blush creeping to his face.

 _'That must be the princess,'_ Alfred thought as Matthew walked off with the woman. _'At least she looks cute.'_

Alfred sighed and turned to get more punch in his cup, but instead found himself bumping into something sturdy. He stumbled a bit, but was caught by strong hands and muttered an apology as he smelt an earthy musk that was distinctly alpha.

"No need to apologize, it was my fault," came an accented voice.

Alfred felt a shiver go down his spine from hearing it and looked up to the alpha in front of him. He felt his mouth gap open slightly as he was met with violet eyes once again. He stared at the peculiar color then looked at the alpha as a whole. He took note of a prominent nose, pale skin, pink lips, a strong yet rounded jaw, and slightly shaggy ash blonde hair. The man's face was gorgeous and when Alfred's eyes traveled further he could tell the man was built like a bear, large and toned, but his fascination was killed when he saw the family crest on the waistcoat he wore.

"You are…" Alfred trailed off as he stared at the crest.

"Prince Braginsky. Ivan Braginsky," he said in his heavy accent.

Alfred swallowed thickly then looked back up to the face of his supposed betrothed.

_'Oh Gods, he's attractive.'_

Ivan stared back at Alfred, unsure of what to do about the omega's open stare. He could smell nervousness coming off of the blonde, but didn't bring it to Alfred's attention. He knew he was nervous as well, but was better at hiding it than Alfred. He hadn't expected the son of King Arthur to look so beautiful. He had tan skin yet looked fair, his hair was brilliantly sunny, his blue eyes as bright as a summer sky behind wire spectacles, and the freckles dusting his cheeks were breathtaking. He was shorter than Ivan imagined, but he knew he was taller than most as it were for his own age.

"Are you alright?" Ivan asked after some time.

Alfred blinked slowly then nodded his head and cleared his throat.

"I'm fine. Quite alright," he said quickly then bowed slightly. "I'm Prince Kirkland. Alfred Kirkland."

"I know," Ivan said with a soft smile on his face as Alfred's face turned red.

"Of course, right… Well, welcome to Sunre," Alfred said trying to sound formal. "I understand you will be staying here for a month."

Ivan arched a curious eyebrow at the tone but nodded. "Yes, we are to be wedded, and the planning will be done here."

Alfred nodded his head then looked out at the crowd to try and find some means of escape. He could feel his nerves getting the better of him and the fact that Ivan was so attractive was not helping. Alfred wanted to shun the man, to not even give him a chance to talk to him, but he was already failing.

Ivan, unaware of Alfred's thoughts, assumed that Alfred was more nervous about talking with him in a crowd. He followed Alfred's gaze to find the ballroom doors open to the gardens and boldly took Alfred's hand in his. He could sense that Alfred was on his guard, and if a change in scenery would ease the omega, then Ivan would try it.

"Come, let's talk somewhere less crowded," Ivan said before taking off.

Alfred wide-eyed at the touch of Ivan's hand but didn't fight him. He found himself being lead to the gardens, the place he had thought to run to in order to get away from Ivan. He didn't want to spend another second near the man, but he couldn't find it in him to pull away. He felt like he had betrayed himself, but the feeling faded once the brisk evening air hit his face. Alfred focused his attention on his surroundings, noting how few people loitered the gardens. A few royals chatting at the chess tables or sitting by the large fountain or gazing at the flowers and topiaries.

A squeeze to Alfred's hand brought his attention to Ivan, and realized that the man had a very strong back. He could tell through how tight Ivan's waistcoat was, how it was wide over his broad shoulders then tapered down to a very firm backside. Alfred blushed and averted his eyes, pretending that he hadn't just caught himself staring at Ivan so intimately.

"Do, you even know where you are going?" Alfred asked, trying to distract himself.

"No, but any spot with no one to interrupt us would do," Ivan said, and Alfred just sighed and finally put his foot down.

Ivan stopped when he felt like he was about to drag Alfred then looked back in confusion as the blond pulled on his hand.

"This way," Alfred said quickly then turned to lead the way.

Ivan smiled softly as he let himself be lead through the gardens and soon found himself in a quiet nook. Sunflowers stood tall and arched over to make a little shelter of sorts and beneath it was a stone bench waiting for them. Alfred let go of Ivan's hand then, and shivered slightly at how cold his hand suddenly felt.

"You are cold," Ivan commented then began to unbutton his coat. "I hadn't thought about your state of dress when I took you out here."

Alfred felt nervousness creep into him as he watched Ivan undo his coat and quickly put a stop to it.

"Please, keep it on. I'm fine. The wind just tickled me, that's all."

Ivan eyed Alfred for a moment but began to redo his buttons. He could smell the nervousness coming from Alfred and he knew he didn't want to scare him off. Ivan couldn't help but wanting to please Alfred in some way. He had been a bit anxious about meeting the blonde himself, he didn't know what to expect when he was told about his betrothal to the omega Prince of Sunre. He had been annoyed at first, but he knew it was for the sake of his kingdom and his family line. He honestly kind of hoped that he could skip getting a Queen once his father passed, but he didn't have such luck. All he wanted to do was just make the best of the things, and Alfred being so cute just happened to help.

Alfred took a seat on the bench with a huff, feeling tired and ready to sleep off the day. Ivan followed his lead and sat down a bit too close for Alfred's liking, but he didn't scoot away.

"Your home is very beautiful Alfred. Your gardens are romantic as well," Ivan commented.

Alfred hated how good his name sounded rolling off Ivan's tongue.

"Thank you," he said in a short tone, still trying to put some distance between them.

Ivan looked at Alfred with curiosity, taking in his bored looking expression in the fading light of the sun. Ivan then looked to the sunflowers around them and plucked one that seemed just as brilliant as the prince beside him. The center was black with speckles of brown and the petals were large, vibrant, and soft yellow, something that Ivan wasn't familiar with at home. Ivan's silence caught Alfred's attention and he turned his head slightly to look at the man. Alfred didn't know why but he felt his heart pick up its pace as he saw the look of admiration Ivan held.

In that moment, Ivan's eyes looked up from the flower, their eyes meeting. Alfred didn't look away and Ivan found that interesting since he was used to omegas avoiding eye contact. He smiled at Alfred then moved to tilt his chin up slightly before placing the sunflower behind Alfred's left ear. Alfred found it a little hard to swallow as Ivan did this, and once he was free he lost to his instincts and broke his gaze.

"You are beautiful," Ivan said suddenly.

Alfred felt a smile work onto his face, but he did his best to beat it down and look indifferent. He wasn't going to allow Ivan to charm him. He had made up his mind when he sat in front of that mirror getting ready for the party, and he was going to stick with it.

"You really are, Alfred, just like this flower. I don't have these at home, but I rather enjoy their vibrant color," Ivan said smoothly. He wasn't sure what to really say to the blonde since he didn't respond like he had expected him to. "Tell me, what type is this?"

Alfred looked at Ivan out of the corner of his eye, taking note of how he waited for his answer.

"It's a sunflower. This is just one of many that we have here," Alfred said as he pulled the flower from behind his ear and looked at it. It was one of the smaller headed sunflowers that grew to massive heights. He rubbed the petals between his fingers, enjoying the velvet like texture, but another hand came to join his. Thick pale fingers caressed a petal near his fingers then gently brushed them as the hand went to take hold of the flower. Another hand brought Alfred's chin up, having the blonde look at Ivan once more as he put the flower back where it was before.

"I like it," Ivan said as he tucked Alfred's hair back with the flower. "It suits you."

Alfred felt his face get hot as he looked at Ivan. He really hated how attractive the man was. He pulled his head from Ivan's gentle hold and looked back to the manor. He honestly didn't know what to do with himself by this point.

"I'm sorry if I upset you." Ivan started. "I only wish to get to know you better."

Alfred looked back to Ivan and eyed him for a second.

_'Perhaps I can cut this short if I just give him a few details. He'll see I'm not such a good catch.'_

"I'm not upset, just… tired," Alfred lied. "And if you wish to get to know me, then fine. There's not much to me honestly. I'm too loud, I speak rudely, and I never know when I should behave, or so my father and mother say. I have manners when I choose to have them and I just wish that I didn't have to grow up," Alfred finished and blushed faintly as he noticed Ivan staring at him.

Ivan didn't know what to say as he listened to Alfred rattle this off, not expecting such quick speech. Ivan wasn't a stranger to Alfred's language by any means, but sometimes it was difficult to keep up with when spoken so quickly.

"Ah, sorry, that was probably too much," Alfred said and went to scratch at the back of his neck, but bumped into the flower. He quickly righted it, being gentle with the sunflower as he put it in its place.

"No, no… you are fine," Ivan said with a smile. "I was just not expecting so much from you so quickly, but I'm glad to have learned this. You are a tough omega, and I find that interesting," Ivan finished.

Alfred shrugged his shoulders then asked, "And what of you?" forgoing the use of Ivan's name on purpose.

Ivan gave a hum to this as he thought of where to start.

"I am a champion fighter, trained vigorously since the day I could wield a sword and not fall over. I'm too stubborn, I show too much of my heart, and I'm too formal, or stiff, when it comes to meeting new people, or so my big sister has told me." Ivan said with a cheeky smile on his face.

"I find that hard to believe," Alfred muttered, though he didn't realize he had said that out loud until Ivan looked at him questionably.

"What is hard to believe?" he asked, and Alfred looked at him as if he had been caught sneaking into something he shouldn't have.

"Y-You, say you show your heart too much. I have always been told the Braginskys are unfeeling," Alfred said boldly. A part of his mind was screaming for him to shut up, but another larger part was telling him to say it.

Ivan frowned as he heard this and Alfred learned that a frown on Ivan's face was nothing short of unsettling.

"We have feelings, we just chose to keep them hidden from others," Ivan said with distaste in his tone. "A man who shows his heart too much is a weak man or a fool. No matter how noble he may think he be."

Alfred was stunned by the dark expression and tone Ivan suddenly had. He never knew someone so handsome could look so frightening. He wanted to say something that would lighten the mood, but before he could properly think he blurted out the first thing to come to mind.

"Is that what your sister said?"

Ivan looked at Alfred with a weak glare, but it quickly melted as he gave a sigh. He could smell the unease coming off of Alfred and the scent left a bitter taste in his mouth.

"No… she said if I showed it too much I could get hurt… whether by someone I would come to love or family."

Alfred gave a hum to that and relaxed as he felt the tension lessen. Alfred went to ask more about Ivan's sister, finding that she was a safe topic, but before he could his twin came from the brush.

"Al! There you are!" Matthew said as he panted softly. "I should have known you would have been hiding out here—oh." Matthew took notice of an earthy woodsy scent, something completely unfamiliar to him and noticed then that the Prince of Owleta was beside his brother.

"My apologies, I hadn't noticed you was there," Matthew quickly said as he looked at Ivan.

"It's alright. You must have something of importance to discuss with Alfred," Ivan said then stood up from the bench. "I will take my leave." Ivan then turned to Alfred and went to reach for Alfred's hand, but stopped short and went for a bow instead. "I look forward to seeing you in these comings days."

Alfred stared at Ivan then to Matthew then back again. He wasn't sure what to say exactly, but before he could come up with something Ivan was already heading out.

"Ah! I-I do as well, Ivan," Alfred called out as he got up from the bench, making Ivan stop mid-step.

He turned slightly to look at Alfred, giving him a genuine smile and said, "I like the sound of my name in your voice. I will see you later."

With that, Ivan left and Alfred stared after him with a deep blush across his face.

 

* * *

 ******* So, im thinkin every Wednesday i will update the fic u.u My usual days off always seem to involve Wednesday :T I hope yall like it and thanks for the comments so far!


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

୨.❀.୧

"Your Highness, breakfast is ready."

Alfred groaned and ignored the servant at his door in favor of pulling his blankets over his head.

"Your Highness?"

A string of soft knocks came to the door and a jiggle of the locked handle, before the servant called again. Alfred frowned as he listened to the noise and buried himself even more into his bed.

"Alfred! Get up! I know you are in there! I can smell you!" Matthew's voice shouted through the door.

Alfred growled and threw his covers off as he shouted, "I will be down when I'm ready!"

"You can't avoid him forever!" Matthew shouted back.

Alfred smacked his lips then threw his covers back on top of his head. He rolled over onto his side and stared at the elegant designs that shown through the fabric due to the sunlight. He felt determined to lay there, but the hunger in his stomach was winning him over.

"Curse Ivan!" he seethed then threw off his covers in a fit of irritation.

He wanted food, but he knew that would mean seeing the Prince of Owleta. Alfred had hoped that Ivan would have left with the guests the night before, but he wasn't that fortunate. Ivan had stayed well through the party, dinner, and then talked with his father and mother for quite some time. By the time Alfred excused himself for bed, Ivan was quick to escort him to his room. Alfred had managed to ditch Ivan before they got too close to his room and hid away. It was an unsettling evening for him, watching Ivan and trying to act cold towards him and failing; he just knew he couldn't run away—or so he thought at the time. Now with a well-rested mind, Alfred felt like he could still put some distance between him and Ivan—to somehow keep the other from wanting to get close to him.

"I cannot give up," Alfred said to himself as he stared at the ceiling. His stomach rumbled at that moment and he let out a heavy sigh. "And I won't starve myself because of him either."

Alfred then sat up and got out of bed. He crossed his large room to get to his closet and opened the door to reveal a plethora of colorful outfits. He selected blue underwear, tight black pants, and a loose cream colored shirt that had a deep V cut. Strings criss-crossed the deep v and Alfred left them loose to show off his chest. He then sat at the vanity in his private washroom and combed his hair and applied a sheer pink lipstick. He stared at himself for a moment then pulled his lips into a smile and said, "Well, good morning Ivan. I see you have yet to get dressed for the day." Alfred hummed as he thought about the insult then tried again. "Good morning Ivan. Tell me, did you sleep well, because I have been told that murders—"

Alfred cut himself off as he lost his train of thought and cursed under his breath. He then looked at the mirror again, smiled brightly and said, "Good morning you attractive bastard— _Why?_ " Alfred dropped his head onto his vanity tabletop and cursed as he banged his head on it again in annoyance. "Why does this have to happen to me?" he shouted upwards as he lifted his head. "What have I done to deserve this?" he whined then sighed heavily as he looked back at the mirror.

"Good morning Ivan. I know that we are meant to wed and have sex together in order to keep your family alive but I rather not because I don't want to be some object to you, although I would like to see what you have in your pants."

Alfred's reflection showed him smiling like an idiot with a blush going from his neck to his ears. He then abruptly dropped the smile and stood up from the vanity.

"Damn attractive bastard and his shitty kingdom and stupid face."

Alfred ranted curse after curse until he got to his bedroom door and opened it to see the object of his despair. His violet eyes brimming with amusement and curiosity, his pale pink lips turned up in a smile upon seeing Alfred.

"Privet, Alfred," Ivan greeted, "That means hello in my country. I was coming to see if you were well, seeing as you missed breakfast."

Alfred stared at Ivan in shock, a part of him worried that Ivan might have heard his insults and compliments.

"How did you get here?" he asked, his mind stuck on the fact that Ivan had found his room.

"Oh, Matthew showed me the way, and I could pick up your scent as well."

Alfred mentally screamed and wrote his brother's name on his "To die" list.

"Well—" Alfred paused as his voice cracked then blushed softly as he cleared his throat. "I'm fine, as you can see, and I wasn't all that hungry which is why I ski—" at that moment Alfred's stomach growled and his blush darkened.

"I believe you are hungry now, yes?" Ivan said with a teasing tone. "Come, I'm sure the cook will have something for you."

Ivan reached for Alfred's hand and before Alfred could even think to pull back, Ivan had him captive. They walked in silence and soon Ivan had Alfred seated at the dining table and was off to get Alfred food. Alfred sighed as his stomach growled again and he put his cheek in his hand.

 _'Stupid stomach, betraying me like that,'_ he thought bitterly.

"Here you go," Ivan said cheerfully as he returned with a tray of food. He set it before Alfred who gawked at the large portions. "You don't have to eat all of it," Ivan assured as he smiled at the blonde then took a seat beside him.

Alfred gave a huff as he picked up his fork, feeling like he had been challenged. He loaded up his fork and went to take his first bite, but stopped as he realized that Ivan wasn't eating.

"Are you just going to sit there?" he asked a little unnerved.

Ivan nodded then motioned for Alfred to eat. Alfred felt his face heart up and tried his best to ignore Ivan as he started to eat his food. It was hard to do however, the man never took his gaze off of Alfred which made him self-conscious about the way he ate. Alfred could only take timid bites and chew slowly, but as his hunger became demanding Alfred found himself asking his brain, _'Why am I eating like this? I don't care what he thinks of me!'_ Alfred had never been one to be shy around food, but Ivan was making him that way. It made no sense to Alfred and he willed away his nervousness and began to scarf down his food. ' _Ha! I'm not some dainty omega!'_ Alfred declared victoriously in his head as he stuffed his face. Ivan just watched with amusement, amazed that Alfred could fit so much food in his mouth and not choke. He didn't know why Alfred looked so smug about it though.

Once Alfred was full, having surprisingly cleaned his plate, Ivan asked what he would like to do. Alfred had hoped Ivan would have been put off by his eating, but that was not the case.

"Come, let's find something to do. Perhaps a walk around the palace will give us an idea," Ivan insisted.

Alfred wanted nothing more than to just lock Ivan in a broom closet, but of course he had no chance of doing that. So he stood up from his chair and followed the taller man around the palace in silence; though Ivan did try to start a conversation every now and then, Alfred's indifferent look kept him at bay. The two eventually came across the west wing library and Alfred stopped in front of its doors.

"Let's go in here," he finally spoke and Ivan eagerly followed.

The library was the largest one out of the three others in the palace. The bookcases were built into the walls and were split into two levels, and a staircase wrapped around the room to allow for the second level to be used. Below chairs and couches where arranged around tables, but all not too far from the fireplace that would warm the room in the winter months. A series of long narrow windows decorated the room, letting in the late summer sunlight. Alfred easily maneuvered himself to a certain table with high-backed chairs. When Ivan approached him he noticed that the table was made for chess.

"Let's play." Alfred said with a smile.

"Alright," Ivan said as he took his seat. "Be warned, I have won countless games."

"Is that supposed to frighten me?" Alfred replied with a grin.

Ivan chuckled at the response and shook his head.

"Just letting you prepare yourself for defeat."

Alfred found himself giggling then full on laughing.

"I would like to see you try and beat me," he said once he calmed down.

"Very well, name your color," Ivan said with a smirk on his lips.

"Black." Alfred said, allowing Ivan to take the first move.

Ivan didn't argue with this and took his move, setting forth a pawn, and starting the game. The game became a true challenge as it progressed, both of them tossing aside their childish moves for more thoughtful and skilled ones. They had tested the waters and knew what they were up against. Alfred was getting the upper hand as they played, but his ego blinded him to an open move that resulted in Ivan's knight checking his king.

"Checkmate."

Alfred gawked at the board then looked up to Ivan's smug face.

"How… But I was so close!" Alfred groaned and slumped back into his chair.

"You were, but you did not pay attention to my knight a few moves back, leaving him an open path," Ivan clarified as he enjoyed Alfred's annoyed expression.

Alfred growled at Ivan then folded his arms over his chest.

"Fine, you win, but I bet if we had a real duel, I would win!" Alfred retorted.

"Alfred, did you forget that I'm a champion fighter?" Ivan said with a teasing laugh.

"We will just have to see, now won't we," Alfred said with a cocky grin on his face. "We will fight before your month is up, promise?" Alfred said and held up his pinky. Yes it was childish, but Alfred wasn't going to let this go and Ivan knew it. Ivan smiled and nodded his head then wrapped his pinky around Alfred's.

"Promise."

"Good."

They then parted and Alfred set the board for another round. They played two more rounds before the need for lunch came to light, Ivan winning three out of the four games they played. Alfred had somehow tricked Ivan into moving his king into a vulnerable spot and snatched a victory in the fourth game.

"Yes! Victory! Now to eat with pride!" Alfred shouted happily.

Ivan just laughed at Alfred and watched him soak in his victory.

"Let's go, oh great Lord of Chess. I too feel peckish," Ivan teased.

Alfred smiled at hearing that and slicked back his hair as he beamed a smile.

"You are quite right, my trusted adviser. Let us eat in honor of my skills."

Ivan couldn't stop smiling as he agreed with Alfred and let him lead the way to the dining room.

When they arrived they found the rest of the Kirkland family sitting at the table and enjoying a nice lunch of meats, cheeses, and breads.

"There you are. I was wondering where you two have been," Francine said with amusement.

"Alfred was merely schooling me in chess, your Highness," Ivan said and Alfred beamed his prideful smile. "Although I had beaten him three times previously."

"Hey!" Alfred pouted and gave a huff. "You didn't have to tell them that!"

"Oh Al, don't be a sore loser," Matthew said then patted the seat beside him.

Alfred grumbled curses under his breath and moved to sit next to his twin. Ivan took a seat beside Alfred, smiling all the while.

"Well, I'm glad that you two are getting along and enjoying your time together," Arthur said making Alfred realize that he _had_ enjoyed his time with Ivan, which shouldn't have happened.

_'Way to go, Alfred.'_

Francine then sighed and started to dab at her eyes with a napkin, making everyone look at her with concern.

"Oh, don't mind me. I'm just happy to see my sons growing up so quickly. Matthew has finally chosen his suitor and Alfred has finally calmed his heart. It's so lovely."

Alfred blushed in embarrassment, but then registered what his mother had said.

"You chose someone?" he asked as he looked at his brother.

"Yes," Matthew said, smiling sheepishly. "Princess Catalina, of Saint Ogan, one of the island kingdoms in the south."

Alfred gasped, his mind filled with all sorts of questions, the main one being, _'How could you fall in love with them?'_

But instead he said, "You will have to tell me more, oh brother of mine."

Matthew just laughed and rolled his eyes, then Arthur spoke up to address Ivan as their food was set before him and Alfred.

"Ivan, I would like to have a word with you after lunch. "

Ivan nodded his head and Alfred felt a pang of disappointment. He knew it was because Ivan would have to be off discussing politics and other important things with his father, but he still wondered why he even cared. He should be happy that Ivan would be out of his hair for a while… shouldn't he?

୨.❀.୧

The second lunch was concluded Arthur ushered Ivan to his study. Ivan looked over his shoulder to see Alfred making Matthew get up so they could go talk, no doubt about the wife that Matthew was planning on taking. Ivan sighed as he was taken to the study, and wished dearly to be by Alfred's side once Arthur began to talk about trading routes. He wanted nothing more than to listen to him talk and laugh, watch him wipe that indifferent look off his face in order to smile at him. He didn't know what it was about Alfred, but ever since he had met him he just wanted to be near him. Alfred was not like any average omega, and wedding or not, Ivan wanted to know him better. The blonde had completely ensnared Ivan's mind.

These thoughts where all that could keep Ivan going as he listened to his soon-to-be father-in-law drone on. The moment Arthur ended their discussion, a servant informed Ivan that the Queen had requested his presence. Ivan felt the urge to decline, but he knew he couldn't. He nodded in understanding and was lead to a massive parlor room that Ivan came to know as the observation room. The far wall was made of nothing but glass which wrapped up to the ceiling. It gave the perfect view of the city below and the setting sun in the horizon with the forest and mountains.

"It's gorgeous, isn't it?" the Queen asked as she made herself known. She was seated on a small couch draped in shades of red, and her hair pulled into a bun.

"Indeed," Ivan said with a nod, then took a seat near the Queen upon her request.

"I'm sorry to have called you here, I know you probably want to spend your time with more… _interesting_ endeavors," she said apologetically. "But we do need to plan for the wedding and coronation."

Ivan could only nod and the Queen promised to make it quick, but Ivan knew he was going to be there for some time. He knew ceremonies took time to plan and this is was no different. They only managed to agree on color schemes and little details such as flowers, tableware, and the use of a catholic priest to officiate the wedding and coronation before it was time for dinner.

Ivan escorted the Queen to the dining hall, both of them talking of the wedding and the future ahead. As they approached the doors Francine stopped and turned to face Ivan fully.

"I know that my son has been difficult to get along with," She began. "You don't have to deny it," she added quickly, seeing that Ivan was fixing to say something. "He has always been so rebellious, but in the time that he's been with you, I feel like he is changing. Please, have patience with him and continue to care for him."

"I will," was all Ivan could say.

Francine smiled at him then headed into the dining hall. When Ivan followed after he noticed the table was short one blonde head, then sat beside Matthew with confusion on his face. Matthew sighed and leaned over to Ivan to whisper, "He's not coming to dinner."

"Why not?" Ivan whispered back.

Matthew rubbed the back of his neck then said, "He ate earlier then took off to his room. He's kind of upset, even though I think he shouldn't be."

Ivan frowned at hearing this and slumped a little in his chair.

"Did I do something that upset him?"

"Not really. He's mostly cross with me, but he will be fine."

Ivan let out a heavy sigh then looked down at the food that was set before him. It was a pasta dish that looked absolutely divine, but he couldn't really enjoy it knowing that Alfred was upset and that he might be the cause of it. He had looked forward to seeing the blonde all evening and now he was upset with him, even if it was only a little. He really did care for the prince, and spent the whole meal thinking about what he could have done to hurt Alfred. The second he was finished he excused himself from the table, and went to Alfred's bedroom eager to fix what he had done wrong, whatever that might be.

_"Don't be a fool. Who could love you?"_

Ivan paused mid-step at hearing the sudden voice from a distant memory. He could picture the slate colored eyes of his father looking at him with disgust as if it had happen just the day before.

"Sir, are you alright?"

Ivan snapped out his state of unease and noticed a servant boy looking at him with concern.

"Yes, I'm quite alright. I… I'm just looking for Prince Alfred's room," he said as calmly as he could.

The boy nodded his head then led the way for Ivan, taking him into the wing of the house where the family slept.

"His is the third door, sir," the boy said, bowing politely.

Ivan thanked him and briskly walked up to the door, but he couldn't allow himself to knock on it. He couldn't shake the cold feeling the memory had brought him. It had been so long ago, but it had stuck to him like a scar.

_"You think you can take your future into your own hands, but look at how pitiful you are now."_

Ivan put the hand he was going to knock with over his racing heart.

 _'No, calm down.'_ He told himself and took a deep breath. _'I will not let him rule over me any longer. I know what and who I am.'_ He took another deep breath, the tightness in his chest easing, then knocked on the door, only to be met with silence. He knocked again, not wanting to voice his arrival in case Alfred refused to open the door. He knocked once again and soon he heard a groan on the other side of the door followed by, "I swear to the Gods, Mattie I will hurt you!" Ivan found himself smiling at hearing that and knocked once more, and the response was immediate. The door was unlocked and practically ripped opened by a seething Alfred, who quickly froze upon seeing Ivan at his door. Ivan was a little surprised by how the quickly the door opened and the look of anger.

"G-Good evening Alfred," he said, trying to keep his composure.

Alfred stared at him for a second longer then grew tense. He moved himself behind the door, blocking Ivan from seeing much of himself or his bedroom.

"What do you want?" Alfred asked, looking around the hall for anyone else.

Ivan winced at the question, feeling even guiltier for causing Alfred distress, but didn't let it deter his mission. "I needed to talk to you," he said, trying to keep his cool.

"Why?"

He could see and hear the annoyance Alfred displayed, but the scent he gave off was more of nervousness than irritation.

"I just wanted to apologize. Matthew told me you was upset, and I fear I might have done something to make you feel that way," Ivan said softly.

Alfred's expression changed to one of surprise, then bashfulness set in as he looked down at the floor.

"I'm sorry for bothering you, but I just wanted to tell you that I'm sorry."

Alfred sighed as he heard this, then looked up to see Ivan turn to leave.

"Ivan, wait!"

Ivan stopped at hearing this and Alfred blushed deeply as he realized he had said the man's name.

"Look, I'm not mad at you," he confessed. "I'm mad at myself, so don't apologize."

Ivan felt so relieved when he heard this that he knew for sure it showed on his face.

"Oh, I see… Well, is there anything I can do?" he offered as he looked at his betrothed.

Alfred shook his head and seemed to pull back a little further from the door.

"Very well. I do hope you feel better and I shall see you in the morning yes?" Ivan asked.

"I-I suppose."

Ivan smiled at him, feeling better than he had before, then without thinking he moved forward and placed a kiss on Alfred's cheek. Alfred gasped softly in shock, and Ivan himself was surprised by his own actions. He pulled back quickly, a faint pink dusting his pale cheeks, which Alfred secretly found extremely alluring.

"Well, um, good night, Alfred," Ivan said a little nervously, then turned to leave.

"G-Good night, Ivan," Alfred said, watching Ivan walk away, then closed the door once he was out of sight. He walked to his bed, falling onto it as a smile stretched across his face, a happy and light feeling bubbling up inside of him as he lay across his bed.

"He kissed me," Alfred whispered, as if it was secret between him and his pillows. "Maybe it wouldn't be so bad to let my guard down…"

_"You can't expect to find love if you are too busy being cold, Alfred."_

Matthew's words echoed through Alfred's head and he sighed into his bedding. He knew Matthew was right, but if he let Ivan in, what would he get in return? What if Ivan wasn't the person for him after all? He couldn't understand how his brother could have fallen in love with Catalina from just meeting her once and exchanging letters. But then again, Matthew wasn't against picking someone to marry like Alfred ways.

"Maybe I should give him a fair chance," Alfred said softly as he touched his cheek, feeling the warmth from Ivan's kiss.

 

* * *

 ******* Princess Catalina is FemCuba btw. See yall Next Wednesday! And Happy Valentines Day!


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

୨.❀.୧

Over the course of two weeks Ivan had tried his best to get closer to Alfred. He spent every second he could with him when his schedule allowed for it. He tailed Alfred like a lost puppy getting attached to someone who showed them kindness. Ivan knew he was being a bit desperate, but he wanted to be near Alfred, to hold him, touch him, and make him smile and laugh. Of course, that only happened when Alfred was in a good mood and Ivan was able to coax it out of him. Alfred was still tense around Ivan, didn't give him much information on himself if he could help it, and he didn't let Ivan into his room. No matter how many times Ivan tried, Alfred would never let Ivan step foot into his room. He could understand why, but Ivan just felt like that room held parts of Alfred that was still hidden from him. He just wanted the blonde to talk to him and open up.

Ivan sighed and rested his head on his desk as he crossed off his newest date idea. He had thought about taking Alfred into the village disguised as peasants, but whether or not Alfred was up for it, it would be difficult to sneak out unnoticed. He scanned the paper he had then set down his quill and sat up.

"What am I doing wrong?" Ivan asked himself. "Why doesn't he like me? He blushes around me and smiles when I compliment him, but then he acts so cold and indifferent…"

Ivan placed his cheek in his hand and used his free hand to pick up the paper.

_'Horseback riding, picnic, garden walks, library hunting, reading together, chess, sword fighting…'_

The list went on and Ivan just set it back down and pressed his hands to his eyes. He then pulled his left hand away and dug into his pants pocket where a folded paper met his fingertips. He pulled it out and opened it gently to find his language written in looping cursive and filled with encouragement.

_'Dear Vanya,_

_I hope this letter finds you in good health and high spirits, little brother. I'm writing to congratulate you on the betrothal to the Sunre Prince. I know that you might not be so enthusiastic about it, but I know you will come to care for him. I have visited their palace once before with Sadik and at the time the children were just adorable little things. I'm sure they have grown into fine young men, and hopefully you'll see that in Prince Alfred. Don't be afraid to open up to him, don't run and hide. I know you have been hurt before, but I have a feeling this will be different. Show your heart Ivan, but don't leave it unguarded. I know you, and you tend to do just that.'_

Ivan could hear his older sister's laugh.

_'I will be attending your wedding and coronation when the time comes, and I look forward to seeing you and your Queen._

_Good luck, Katyusha'_

Ivan sighed when he finished it, having read it many times now since he left his home, but it still helped him feel better. He missed his sister. Katyusha had always been there to stand up for him, keeping him going when things got too difficult. She always had a way of making him feel better and even embarrassed, which she never meant to half the time. Ivan never thought she'd get sent away since she was the oldest, but his father had other plans. He didn't want an omega being the first in line or a woman. He preferred Ivan, even if he was weak in his eyes, Ivan was a man and an alpha, and that's all he wanted. Katyusha didn't put up a fight when she was told she was going to marry Sadik, an emperor of the largest Middle Eastern kingdom, Tuss, but Ivan had. Of course his father wasn't happy with his behavior and had thoroughly beat him for it—his preferred punishment. Once Katyusha was gone it was just him and Natalia, his little sister.

Natalia was an alpha and acted just like their father, but behind closed doors she showed emotion and latched onto Ivan. She took care of him when he was beaten by their father, and she even tried to stand up for Ivan on occasion, especially when he wanted to plot his own future, but she bitterly backed down in fear of their father. Ivan didn't blame her, and even thanked her for not getting herself hurt on his account. Natalia kept up her image of their father's idea of perfect, which put her in a special place in his heart. When Natalia turned 16 last year, she refused every one of her proposals and got away with it. Father wanted an omega of worth to be with his daughter, so he didn't question her judgment. The truth of it was that Natalia didn't want to leave Ivan's side. She wanted to stay with him as long as she could to make sure he was safe. Even with their father's death imminent he could still be brutal, and proved it time and again.

Ivan let out a heavy sigh as he thought about his father's condition. He honestly felt nothing for it—no happiness, no sadness, nothing. He just wanted the man to go and leave him and his sisters be. The only good thing their father had ever done for them was let them live—that, and, for Ivan, arranging his marriage with Alfred. If his father hadn't been so picky he wouldn't have ever met Alfred, and probably been married to the first person to come along if it benefited his father.

"Oh, that's right, I need to meet Alfred for chess," Ivan suddenly said to himself, the promise of another game breaking though his brooding thoughts.

He quickly stood up from his desk, checking the time on the grandfather clock adorning his room, then left. He could feel his steps getting lighter and his mind clearing as he got closer and closer to the library that Alfred would be waiting in. He opened the door eagerly to see the blonde, and smiled softly at seeing Alfred already at the chess table that was set and ready.

"Took you long enough," Alfred said once he realized he wasn't alone. "You can't stall defeat."

Ivan laughed as he took his seat and smiled at the prince before him. He couldn't help but stare at him for a moment, his freckled face was gaining a blush as his blue eyes tried to keep up a determined stare.

"Are you going to stare at me all day or play?" Alfred questioned.

"I could always do both," Ivan replied with a smirk on his lips.

Alfred blushed even more, then looked at the board.

"Just move your pawn," he bit out, trying to keep his composure.

Ivan kept the smirk on his face, but moved his pawn to start the game. He placed his white pawn one tile forward and Alfred did the same but more slowly. Ivan could tell that Alfred was already thinking of a few moves, determined to win. They played with caution, not wanting to make a single mistake that could be their downfall. It seemed like they would hit a stalemate, but Alfred quickly corrected it by checking Ivan's king. Ivan was a little shocked by the loss then looked up to Alfred who had the smuggest look on his face he had ever seen. Ivan just shook his head as he smiled at Alfred then asked, "Round two?"

"I don't see why not," Alfred said feeling cocky.

Ivan just rolled his eyes and set up the board again, this time Alfred taking the white. They played in a similar fashion as before, but the victory went to Ivan when he took his knight and knocked over Alfred's king. Alfred bit the inside of his cheek at the move, but didn't say anything as he set up the board again. This time Alfred contemplated cheating, but he knew it would be a hollow victory, and stayed loyal to the rules. However, as Ivan went to checkmate Alfred before Alfred could checkmate him, he "accidentally" kicked the table, making the pieces fall out of place.

"Oops! I'm sorry, my leg was cramping up and I just had to stretch it out before it started to hurt too badly," Alfred said innocently as Ivan looked at him with a flat look. "Terribly sorry."

Ivan sighed then felt himself starting to laugh, it was a low chuckle then grew into a hearty laugh. He dropped his chess piece to wipe tears from his eyes as he laughed and Alfred watched in complete awe. He had never heard Ivan laugh like that and found it completely captivating and contagious. They both laughed together, unable to stop the giggles and tears.

"That—that was so childish," Ivan said between laughs.

"I know! I can't—I can't believe I did that!" Alfred replied as he wiped his tears.

They laughed for a while longer before finally calming down and taking deep breaths.

"Your face is so red," Alfred commented as he looked at Ivan.

"So is yours," Ivan replied. "I haven't laughed like that in a long time."

Alfred felt something akin to pride when he heard that then sighed deeply as he rested in his chair.

"Well, I suppose I better clean this up," Alfred pointed out as he looked down at the floor, the chess pieces laying haphazardly.

"I will help," Ivan said as Alfred got up.

Alfred didn't argue with him, allowing Ivan to assist as they both started to clean up the mess. Once the pieces where put back in their respective drawers Alfred gasped softly as he remembered something.

"Our duel!" he said quickly. "We have yet to see who is champion at the sword!"

Ivan hummed as he recalled the pinky promise he had made just weeks ago.

"Shall we find out today?"

Alfred grinned at hearing that and nodded his head.

"Come, I bet you haven't seen our display armory yet!" he said energetically, then grabbed Ivan's hand in his own to lead the way.

Ivan was surprised when Alfred took his hand, but he didn't shy from it. He was happy that Alfred felt comfortable with him enough to touch him like that.

 _'Now, if only he'd say my name more often,'_ Ivan thought as a smile came to his face.

୨.❀.୧

The walk to the display armory was of decent distance, located at the far end of the wing they were in. The door was made of heavy black stained wood, with large iron knockers that served as door handles. The room was dark, with only a strip of light coming from between the curtains that covered the massive window on the far left wall. Alfred quickly walked over to it and pulled on the curtain and ran with it to bring in light. Ivan looked at the room that was revealed in the late afternoon light with an impressed look. The floor was polished cream marble and had a deep orange rug running down the middle of it. Swords of different styles and origins hung on every wall; alongside them were axes, maces, and various other weapons that Ivan could identify. Suits of armor held spears and banners hung throughout the room.

"What do you think?" Alfred asked once he finished tying back the last curtain and came back to Ivan.

"It's impressive and strangely inviting," Ivan said as he looked at everything all at once. He wasn't used to a dueling area being inviting, it wasn't like the one he had at home; it was monotone in color and had small windows lined around the walls, making it feel more like a prison, which it did when Ivan was learning to fight.

"Come, the store room is just at the other end," Alfred said as he took Ivan's hand again, bringing the man from his memories. "We will find our swords of choice, then fight."

Ivan nodded as he was lead to the store room and soon was greeted with various blades.

"This is only a small part of what we have," Alfred clarified. "The rest is in the armory in the lower levels where the knights and guards stay."

"Makes sense," Ivan said as he examined a long sturdy sword.

They both eyed the weapons before agreeing on something lightweight. They picked up two matching swords that held average length blades and decorative handles. They then placed a proactive pad over their torsos, which was used for training duels, and left the store room. They took their place in front of the window where a large rectangle was set out to mark the dueling area. They stood a few feet apart and held their swords in the poses they were taught—Alfred going for a loose yet tense stance—sword held up, and Ivan's wider with his sword held down.

"You ready?" Alfred asked smirking.

Ivan nodded his head and they both stood in silence for a second before lunging for each other. Alfred brought his sword down on Ivan, but Ivan blocked it when he pulled his sword upwards.

"You can do better than that, can't you?" Ivan teased and Alfred let out a huff and pulled back. He went for Ivan again, missed on purpose, making Ivan move into the path of his sword, and almost got his side if Ivan had jumped back.

"Scared?" Alfred asked with a smirk.

"Not in the slightest!" Ivan said with a smile.

They fought each other well, swords clashing and insults flying, but as it progressed the fun seemed to fade for Ivan. As the sunlight stretched Ivan felt a chill come over him as he fought Alfred.

_"You best fight seriously or I will have you punished once more!"_

_"But I don't want to hurt him!"_

The clang of metal hitting metal made Ivan flinch as he remembered the slap he had received from his father.

_"Kill him or he will kill you. I'm sure I can have another alpha son that won't be a disappointment."_

Ivan let out a yell as he brought his sword down on Alfred harder than he had throughout their whole fight. Alfred was surprised by it, and fell to the ground, but didn't let it affect his fighting. He fought back, pushing Ivan's blade to the side and rolling away.

"Nice move," Alfred shouted, but Ivan didn't respond back.

_"You pathetic, boy."_

Ivan felt his arm twitch as he was haunted by his childhood. It felt so real, as if he had just fought the man his father had forced him to kill just yesterday rather than 10 years ago.

"Ivan, wait!"

Ivan snapped out his trance at the call of his name and looked down to see Alfred cowering on the floor as his sword was brought down on him. Ivan had managed to knock Alfred's sword out of his hand and sliced Alfred's right palm and cheek. Ivan stopped what he was doing the second he smelled the stench of blood and fear, and dropped the sword. Alfred held up his bloodied hand in attempt to protect himself as tears filled his eyes. The second he realized he wasn't being sliced open by a sword, he scrambled to get away.

"Alfred!"

Ivan was quick to react, and grabbed Alfred's leg before he could get up.

"NO! NO GET AWAY! SOMEONE, HELP!" Alfred screamed as he tried to fight Ivan off.

Ivan took the hits that Alfred delivered but didn't let him go. He got him close to his chest and smothered him into a hug so tight that Alfred lost his fight and cried into Ivan's chest.

"I'm so sorry. So so sorry. Prosti," Ivan chanted, his voice cracking as tears began to fall.

Alfred fell silent as he listened to Ivan apologize in his language and Ivan's own, and flinched as Ivan's tears fell onto his face. Alfred didn't know what was going on, but he could tell Ivan was truly regretting what he had done. He moved a hand to touch Ivan's face, but Ivan stopped it as he smelt the blood on it. Ivan whispered his apology against the bleeding hand then began to lick the blood off. The cut wasn't too deep, but still deep enough to bleed immensely. Ivan licked at it 'til he could get it as clean as he could then licked the cut on Alfred's cheek. He didn't know why exactly he chose to clean Alfred's wounds this way, but it was just in his instincts to do so. Once the blood was gone Ivan bit into the cuff of his shirt, holding the frill that decorated his sleeve between his teeth then ripped it off. Alfred watched in shock as Ivan used his shirt to wrap his hand then kiss it gently.

"I'm so sorry, so sorry," Ivan said in a hoarse voice, not once looking Alfred in the eyes. "I will… I will take you to someone who can get you the help you need for your wounds, then… then I will leave you alone."

Alfred could only nod, not able to find his voice. Ivan didn't question it, and helped Alfred up. They walked out of the armory and headed back to the library in hopes that someone would be near. Luckily for them two servants were walking and talking amongst themselves when Ivan spotted them.

"Please! I need help!" he called out to them.

Both women looked at Ivan in surprise then gasped and hurried to get Alfred from him.

"He is hurt, please take him to get bandaged."

The women nodded frantically then hurriedly guided the prince to the in-house doctor. As they left, Ivan quickly headed to his room; each step he took became more urgent. Once in his room he locked himself inside and the first thing he could think to do was punch something. He chose one of the many pillows on his bed as his target and unleashed every ounce of anger he held. He didn't think, only felt, as he pounded the pillow until it burst. He was startled by it, but tried to keep going, but as his anger faded, sadness took its place. Tears started to fall as he threw weak punches at the pillow, before stopping all together and falling to his knees by the bed. He buried his face into the edge of his bed and clutched the feathers and bedding in his hands as he screamed into them.

"Why?" he cried as he finally found his voice. "I don't want to be like this! I promised myself I wouldn't!" He hiccuped into the bedding, then banged his head against the mattress. "I wanted to change for Alfred, for me!" he wailed.

_'I tried so hard! I'll surely be thrown out of the palace now! Alfred will never speak to me again!'_

"This is your fault!" Ivan growled as he pictured his father's cold face. He punched his bed then cried heavily once more. All he could think about was the fact that he had nearly killed Alfred. The duel had brought back the old Ivan. The Ivan that had been training to kill since he was child, had been beaten for showing compassion, had been beaten for trying to find happiness. "I showed my heart too much and hurt us both…" Ivan said in a hoarse voice. His cries now quiet and only a headache and guilt weighed on him.

Ivan took a shaky breath then wiped at his face with the cuff of his shirtsleeve. He sat in silence for a while, thinking of nothing, then took a more even breath.

"I should probably pack," Ivan said to himself, then moved to get up.

The second he was on his feet, he heard a knock on his bedroom door. Ivan flinched and stayed silent, afraid of who might be there. Another soft knock came to the door and Ivan still didn't move, but then he realized that if it was a guard coming to throw him out the knocking would have been more pounding and someone would be yelling. However, none of that was going on, just a soft knock on the door.

Ivan swallowed thickly and moved to the door and unlocked it slowly, opening the door just a crack to find a crop of blonde hair and a cowlick. He looked down a bit and noticed it was Alfred at his door, a bandage on his cheek and his bandaged hand waved at him.

"Why are you here?" Ivan asked, genuinely surprised. "Shouldn't you be telling the guards to throw me out?"

Alfred stared at Ivan, caught off guard by his words.

"N-No," he finally said, "I didn't tell anyone you did this—besides I know you hadn't meant to hurt me."

Ivan averted his eyes when he heard this.

"I don't deserve mercy… I'm sorry," Ivan said softly and Alfred just looked at him with a soft smile on his face.

"It's alright."

Ivan snapped his gaze to Alfred, disbelief written on his face.

"No it is not," he said sternly. "I have injured you and ruined your beauty!"

Alfred felt his face grow hot as he realized that Ivan had called him beautiful. He placed his hand on his bandaged cheek, then shook his head.

"It is fine, I promise."

"No it is not fine," Ivan said, getting frustrated.

Alfred picked up on this then looked around the hallway before saying, "How about I come in so we can disagree privately?"

Ivan looked at Alfred with unease, but Alfred ignored the look and pushed on the door. Ivan stepped back with the door without thinking, allowing Alfred to enter.

"Oh my," Alfred said softly as he noticed the mess of feathers and the busted pillow.

"S-Sorry for the mess," Ivan stammered, feeling embarrassed and terrified. He didn't feel safe with Alfred in the room. He didn't know what could happen with Alfred so close to him. He didn't want to hurt him again.

"It's alright, my room is not much better," Alfred said with a small laugh as he sat on Ivan's bed.

He brushed his fingers through the feathered mess, enjoying the softness before looking up at Ivan. The man was still by the bedroom door, now closed, and looking nervous.

"Ivan," Alfred started, using the name willingly once more, having started to enjoy the taste of it on his tongue. "I just want to know one thing." Ivan didn't meet Alfred's eyes but nodded his head. "What happened in there? You were fine one moment, then the next you became so aggressive. I—I thought for a second that you would kill me when you knocked my sword from me, cutting me in the process."

Ivan felt like crying again, but held himself together as he responded.

"I… I have told you how I had been trained to fight ever since I could hold a sword," he started and Alfred nodded even though Ivan couldn't see it. "When we started dueling I… I lost myself to my past. I don't know what started it but I just suddenly felt like my father was in the room judging me, criticizing me, threatening me, if I didn't kill you. It had been like that when I was taught to fight, facing against petty criminals. He said if I fought them then I would be a better fighter because it was either their life or mine."

"That's awful," Alfred said without thinking, shock evident in his voice.

Ivan just nodded his head and rubbed at his neck.

"I didn't mean to act the way I did, the memories just overtook me. I'm sorry, so so sorry. I never wanted to hurt you," he said his voice growing strained with each word.

Alfred picked up on this easily and got up from the bed to get close to Ivan. He felt hesitant to reach out to him, but he steeled himself and reached his bandaged hand to Ivan's face. He lifted it to see tears pouring from amethyst eyes and Alfred wiped them away with his fingers gently.

"I know you didn't mean it. You have proven that, but what you did will stay with me, sad to say."

"I understand."

"You scared me Ivan, but I know there is more to you than I originally thought."

Ivan looked up at Alfred for the first time then and had the urge to hold him. Just having his hand on his face was sending his heart into a tizzy.

"Let's take some time apart. In three days, let's meet in the gardens."

Ivan nodded but frowned slightly.

"I will miss you," he said softly.

Alfred smiled warmly at Ivan then, without thinking, leaned up to give him a kiss on the cheek. When he pulled back Ivan's face was a brilliant red and Alfred's was starting to match it.

"Well, I ought to be going. Can't stay here for too long, someone might think we are up to something," he said with a nervous laugh.

"You are right," Ivan replied hoarsely as Alfred backed up to the door. "I will see you in three days?" he asked when Alfred opened the door.

"In three days," Alfred said then held up his pinky. "I promise."

Ivan smiled softly at seeing the gestured and held up his own pinky in return. Alfred smiled at him brightly then left his room, shutting the door behind him. Ivan let out a shaky breath as he felt a wave of calm wash over him as well as fatigue. He felt good, not great, but good, which was enough for him at the moment. He could understand why Alfred wanted time apart, and he was grateful that he hadn't just thrown him out.

"I will get better," Ivan told himself then walked over to his bed to start picking up feathers.

 

* * *

 ******* Thank you for reading! See ya next Wednesday!


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***A/N The dialog in previous chapters have changed from modern to more formal to match this chapter. I realized I had gotten off track with keeping things old school and had to go back and fix it xp

**Chapter 5**

୨.❀.୧

Grey clouds ate away at the pale morning sky, covering the rising sun. Alfred watched with intrigue as the grey clouds became darker, looking heavier and heavier each passing second. He felt like it was symbolic, perhaps a warning from the Gods. Or maybe he was just being paranoid.

Alfred sighed and brought his injured hand to his face, touching the thin scab that still clung to his cheek. He then looked at his hand, still bandaged but healing nicely, as the doctor had told him. He curled his fingers into a fist then opened it once more, feeling the slight tug of tight healing skin underneath. The incident had taken place a few days ago, but the fear still lingered on the edge of his mind.

"What have I gotten myself into?" he asked himself in a hushed voice.

He turned on his side to face the back of the couch he was laying on and started to pluck at the fabric. He didn't know what to do with himself or what to do about Ivan. The month was almost up and soon he'd be sent off to Owleta to be married and crowned all in one day. A part of him almost seemed happy about that, but the other, not so much. He was worried. Ever since Ivan had hurt him he couldn't stop wondering if it would happen again. During their time apart all he could think about were scenarios where Ivan would lose himself and end up killing him, whether it be in bed, during a disagreement, or even during breakfast.

The uncertainty was unsettling, but that small part that felt happy wanted to be more optimistic. Ivan was attractive, a fact that made Alfred's pulse race no matter what. Ivan appeared to be kind and caring, especially when he had hurt Alfred during the duel. He had no idea that Ivan was capable of showing such emotion, crying before him as he tried to fix what he had done. He even took precautions when they had met yesterday, keeping himself at a distance and making sure that other people where nearby wherever they went. Alfred appreciated it greatly, though a part of him ached for Ivan to hold his hand like before. They had a nice evening of tea in the garden then roamed the large garden until they grew tired. They retired to a parlor room where they played a simple game of cards that quickly lost its charm, but Ivan had saved the evening by insisting they build a castle out of the cards. It had been fun and lighthearted, even at dinner they chatted while they ate.

"It was nice," Alfred said to himself then scratched his bandaged hand.

"What was nice?" came a sudden voice, startling Alfred into sitting up.

"Oh! Matthew!" Alfred said in surprise then sighed in relief. "Don't scare me like that!"

Matthew chuckled as Alfred calmed down and walked over to him to sit beside him.

"I wouldn't have startled you if you wasn't afraid of being found," he said, poking brother's forehead. "What is going on with you?"

Alfred frowned slightly then turned away to face the widow once more, seeing that sunlight shown through the grey in ribbons of light.

"Oh, nothing," Alfred said casually.

Matthew hummed at hearing the answer then moved to lean onto Alfred's side.

"If it's nothing, then why do you look so anxious?" Matthew asked.

"That is just how I look," Alfred replied as he tried to ignore his brother.

"Alfred, you and I both know that is a lie," Matthew said. "Are you worried about Ivan?"

Alfred tensed at the question reflexively, which was enough of an answer for Matthew.

"You didn't injure yourself like you said you did, did you?" Matthew asked.

"Matthew, can you please not talk about that?" Alfred asked, causing Matthew to sit up and stare at the back of Alfred's head.

"He did cut you!" Matthew declared. "I knew it! And yet you lied for him!"

"It was not like that!" Alfred bit out then turned from the window to look at his brother. "It was an accident. We were dueling to see who was best—that part was true, but… Ivan remembered something troubling and… Well, I don't want to go against him by telling you, but just know that when he snapped out of it he regretted what he done. He cried for me, Matthew, he held me so close and licked my wounds. He was hurting more than me," Alfred said softly.

"Alfred…You shouldn't be around him, he's dangerous," Matthew said with concern. "You never know what might set him off. What if he hurts you again?"

Alfred sighed and slumped back into the couch.

"I know. That's what I have been thinking about all this time, but…" Alfred tried to think of the words he needed but gave up with an exasperated sigh. "I don't know how to put it into words! Ivan has just… gotten into my head."

Matthew looked at his brother with a curious expression on his face.

"Not too long ago you was saying you wanted to run away from him, and now that he's hurt you, you want to stay with him?"

"That's not what I meant!" Alfred interjected. "I don't understand it myself, but I have learned more about Ivan. He is a flawed soul, but he is caring, gentle, and even though he hurt me I… I don't fear him, not much anyway... Not everyone is perfect, Matthew," Alfred said confidently.

Matthew hummed at hearing this and rested his head back on the couch, looking up at the ceiling.

"So you don't want to refuse him anymore?" Matthew asked after some time. "You will actually take his hand in marriage?"

Alfred cringed a little at the question. He still wasn't sure about marrying Ivan. He liked his company, but he didn't know if he liked him all that much to marry him willingly.

"I… don't know…" Alfred confessed. "This whole time I had my heart set on rejecting him, locking him out of my life. I knew that marrying him would happen whether I wanted it to or not, so I had planned on making our marriage insufferable. I just… I wanted nothing to do with him. I wanted to find my own first love but now…" Alfred trailed off uncertain of what he wanted to say. He knew there was a word for it but he couldn't believe it to be accurate. He had spent days hating Ivan and trying to turn the man away and yet, he had found himself getting closer to him, enjoying his company, eager to see his face, longing for the touch of his hand, and the feeling of his lips on his own. Even during their days apart Alfred couldn't stop thinking of Ivan. At first it had been fear, but as the days passed he found himself longing for Ivan.

"Al?" Alfred snapped from his thoughts to see his twin looking at him with a smirk on his face. "Are you falling in love?"

Alfred felt his face heat up quickly and his heart pound in his chest.

"N-No, I couldn't be in love with Ivan, not after everything… could I?" Matthew just kept his smirk and Alfred put his head in his hands. "I don't even know what love is. How could I do something that I know nothing about?"

"That's how love works," Matthew replied safely. "Sometimes you know in an instant, other times it takes a while to figure it out."

Alfred pressed his fingers beneath his glasses and pressed on his eyes. He was more lost than ever. He liked Ivan as a person, like a friend, he had come to see him in a different light.

_'But what kind of friend longs for kisses?'_

"Gods… I-I don't know… Maybe?"

"Don't try to rush it Al, you will know when the time comes," Matthew said then patted his brother's shoulder. "However, if he hurts you again you better tell someone."

Alfred felt the tension ease from him as he heard this then leaned into his brother.

"Okay."

Matthew smiled then drew his attention to the window as he noticed how dark it became. Alfred followed his gaze and they both witnessed the first lightning bolt weave through the clouds before thunder rumbled loudly. The windows shook gently from the thunder then began to play a relaxing rhythm as rain pounded against the glass. Matthew sighed and watched the storm with calm, but Alfred felt unease.

୨.❀.୧

Ivan walked the halls with a hopeful heart in his chest. Yesterday had gone better than he could have hoped for. He had been worried that Alfred wouldn't want to spend time with him, that he would no longer want to be with someone who hurt him. It had plagued Ivan through the days they were apart, but he tried to stay hopeful, and sure enough it paid off. The date had been casual and in the open, an attempt to make them both feel at ease. He loved the way Alfred acted so open with him, seemingly to invite his touch, but he had refrained. He didn't want to take any chances overstepping his boundaries or hurting the omega again. He truly did care for Alfred with all his heart, he couldn't deny this. He wished that he could know how Alfred felt. Surely he had to have felt something to still want to be with him—and that kiss! Ivan placed a hand to his cheek as he recalled the quick peck that Alfred had given him. It made his heart race and a smile stretch across his face.

"—been thinking about all this time, but…"

Ivan paused his walking as this sudden voice snapped him out of his reverie.

"I don't know how to put it into words!"

Ivan turned to his left, following the voice and found a door holding back the voice. He could have sworn it sounded like Alfred, but it was muffled.

"—gotten into my head…"

"Alfred?" Ivan said in a soft voice, recognizing the stressed tone to be his betrothed. He felt an itch to know what was going on behind the door, whether he needed to defend Alfred or leave him be was clawing at him. He looked around the hall then against his better judgment and growing curiosity, he placed an ear to the door.

He listened intently through the thick door, trying to hear what was being said. He could make out another voice, a softer voice that was lost to him, but Alfred's response came quick and loud.

"That's not what I meant!" Ivan wide eyed at hearing this but didn't move. "I don't understand it myself but I have learned more about Ivan. He is a…" Alfred's voice dropped in volume a bit and Ivan had to resist the urge to push himself harder against the door. All he could think was, _'They are talking about me!'_

"I don't fear him, not much anyway... Not everyone is perfect, Matthew."

Ivan felt a lump form in his throat as he heard this, worry weighed heavily in his chest. The twin princes were talking about him and by the sound of it, it wasn't good.

_'Did Alfred tell Matthew the truth about his wounds? Why is it so quiet? Someone speak!'_

"So you don't want to refuse him anymore?" Matthew asked, Ivan recognizing his voice taking on a louder tone. "You will actually take his hand in marriage?"

Ivan felt his breath hitch at hearing this and his heart beat racing.

_'Refuse me?'_

"I… don't know…" Alfred said, Ivan almost missing it since his voice dropped in volume, sounding confused. "—I had my heart set on rejecting him, locking him out of my life. I knew that marrying him would happen whether I wanted it to or not —planned on making our marriage insufferable…" As Alfred trailed off Ivan felt his heart seize up. "I wanted nothing to do with him. I wanted to find my own first love…"

If there was anything more to be said, Ivan was deaf to it. He pulled back from the door and took a few steps from it as he stared at it in disbelief.

_'Alfred couldn't have said that… He couldn't have!'_

_'Face it, he doesn't want you. Nobody does.'_

Ivan blinked rapidly at the cold voice that intruded on his thoughts then felt something wet streak down his face. He touched his face to find tears there then clenched his hand into a fist.

_"Don't be a fool. Who could love you?"_

Ivan grit his teeth as his father's voice echoed in his head. He needed to leave, he needed to get away from the door, from himself. Without thinking, he turned on his heel and walked quickly to a room that no one would think to find him in. He picked a door further down the hall, but upon opening it he found it to be the observation room. The room was dark and chilled from the storm that raged outside. The lightning cracked, brightening the room up for a second before it plunged back into darkness. It was here that Ivan yelled at the glass as thunder shook it.

"You showed your heart, your pathetic boy," Ivan told himself, voice hoarse from yelling.

୨.❀.୧

Alfred wondered the palace, searching for Ivan anywhere he could. He knew they couldn't do much together with the storm still going outside, but he thought sneaking into the kitchen for a few snacks before dinner would be fun. He had asked everyone where Ivan could have been, but each lead he had turned out to be a dud. However, he was able to find his father sitting at his desk in his study, going over papers.

"Father? Have you seen Ivan?" Alfred asked as he poked his head into the room.

Arthur looked up briefly then back to his papers.

"I haven't. Perhaps your mother has him, planning the wedding and all that."

Alfred gasped softly at the idea, realizing that he hadn't checked the observation room. He thanked his father before quickly heading to the room. He decided to forgo knocking, instead letting himself in, eager to free Ivan from his mother so they could eat sweets in the kitchen. However, as he opened the door he found nothing but darkness and Ivan sitting in front the window.

"Hey, Ivan, you want to get a few snacks before dinner?" Alfred asked, but the second he did the smell of anger hit his nose. The hairs on his neck stood on end as he realized that the bitter scent was coming from Ivan. It put him on edge, but he didn't leave the room. "What's wrong Ivan?"

There was only silence, but before Alfred could ask again Ivan spoke.

"I think you know what's wrong," Ivan said coldly, not moving from the window.

Alfred furrowed his brow and walked further into the room, closing the door behind him as he said, "I don't understand."

Ivan scoffed at hearing that. "Honestly, neither do I!" he said bitterly then turned to look at Alfred. "Do you think this is a game, Alfred?" he asked as he moved to get up. "That my feelings are your playthings?"

Lightning cracked through the sky, making Alfred jump as the tension ate at his nerves. He was completely confused about Ivan's lines of questions and wondered if he should just leave.

"What are you talking about?" Alfred finally asked, watching Ivan warily.

"This afternoon, I heard you and Matthew talking in the library…"

Alfred felt his heart skip a beat once Ivan said this. _'He couldn't have heard us!'_ Alfred thought then said, "I don't know what you are talking about."

The second the words left his mouth Alfred regretted it. The look of pure hatred that came to Ivan's face was enough to make Alfred take a step back. He wanted to run and hide, but he knew he couldn't. If Ivan had heard them then what did he hear?

"Ivan, please, tell me what has made you so angry!" Alfred pleaded as the man took a few steps towards him.

"You know what you said!" Ivan growled. "You never wanted anything to do with me! You never wanted to even acknowledge me! I tried to make the best of things, I tried to open myself up to you once I realized that being with you might not be so bad, but you… You just played with my feelings!" Alfred lost his voice as Ivan yelled at him. He couldn't think of anything to say to make things better. "Why would you say those things, but act as if you hadn't?! Why didn't you tell me you didn't want this?!"

"Because I was scared!" Alfred snapped, making Ivan fall silent and calmed down a little. "I was scared of being ripped from my family, my home! Scared of being with a stranger and someone I could possibly never love! Scared of being with someone who I have heard nothing but bad things about! I just wanted to still be a child! I wanted to pick the one I chose to love!" Alfred shouted, tears falling down his face as he finally said what had been weighing on his heart.

Ivan stood before Alfred in silence, watching him wipe at his tear stained face. Ivan felt the lead weight of guilt resting in his stomach, knowing well how Alfred felt. He sighed and ran a hand through his hair as he tried to steady his nerves.

"I wanted that as well," Ivan started, getting Alfred's attention. "I wanted to pick who I got to love. Before you… My father had been looking for a suitor, but during that time I was looking for one on my own. Hoping to find them before my father picked someone…." Ivan said with a bittersweet smile gracing his lips. "I managed it… around when I was your age and it had been wonderful until I found out their true intentions…" Alfred didn't say anything, only sniffling as he listened. "I showed my heart too much. After that I gave up and let my father do whatever he wanted and even though I ached for the ones I had hurt I didn't back down from my father. Those things you have heard, the murders, and the lack of humanity… they were me… once… but after I heard of my betrothal to you… I had hoped I could change, that things could be different, but I was once again the fool…" Ivan finished, his voice cracking towards the end and Alfred felt fresh tears come to his eyes. Ivan had never told anyone about that incident, only his family had known, and now that he had said it, it hurt.

"Ivan, no… no I'm the fool. I'm the selfish one! I didn't want to take this seriously because I was stupid and afraid, but being with you these few weeks have changed my thinking," Alfred admitted and stepped up to Ivan, but still had some distance between them. "You probably didn't hear this, but I also said that…" Alfred felt like his heart was going to give out as he prepared himself to speak. "I said that… I think, I'm falling in love…."

"You don't mean that," Ivan said quickly, disbelieving.

"But, I do!" Alfred corrected and reached out to hold Ivan's hands without hesitation. "I'm not sure what I'm feeling exactly, but when I look at you I just feel happy to be close to you. I constantly want you to hold my hand or kiss my cheek and it's embarrassing but true!" Alfred declared, squeezing Ivan's hands, not wanting him to back away. "Please believe me. I'm not deceiving you, no longer."

Alfred looked into Ivan's eyes once he finished, sincerity evident in his gaze. Ivan stared at him for a long moment, trying to find fault, trying to find a reason to end whatever they had. He couldn't find anything. All he saw was regret and pleading eyes, he saw an uncertain heart that was trying to reach out to him. Ivan didn't know what to do. He didn't want to get hurt again, and he didn't want Alfred to force his feelings, but he couldn't let him go. Ivan squeezed Alfred's hands then leaned forward to rest his forehead on Alfred's.

"We are both showing our hearts, yes?"

Alfred felt a smile come to his face as he nodded then looked up at Ivan. He stared into his violet eyes, seeing a tinge of red to them, a sign of crying. Alfred found it beautiful to look at, but his concentration was broken as he noticed that Ivan seemed to have gotten closer and he felt Ivan's lips brush his. Alfred went stalk still and Ivan was cautious, but after a beat of pause Ivan moved in, kissing Alfred on the lips for the first time. It was soft and chaste, but so warm and inviting. When they pulled apart the rumble of thunder made them aware of their surroundings once again.

They stood in the room listening to each other breath, the pounding of the rain, and the racing of their hearts. Even with all the noise and chaos they felt at ease as they stood holding each other's hands and their foreheads pressed together. Alfred looked up at Ivan's eyes once more taking note of how tranquil they looked before looking at Ivan's parted pink lips. Alfred didn't even think when lunged for those lips once more, wanting to feel them against his own and taste them. Ivan wide-eyed from the sudden kiss, but didn't pull back. He let go of Alfred's hands to wrap them around his slender frame and kissed him back. Alfred had never experienced a kiss like this, but he knew he couldn't get enough, he wanted more and more of Ivan. He wrapped his arms around Ivan's neck, burying a hand in Ivan's shaggy hair as he placed sloppy and overly eager kisses on Ivan's lips. Ivan enjoyed each kiss and smiled into it as he held Alfred as close he could.

Alfred found himself giving an involuntary moan as he felt Ivan press their lower halves together. He didn't know what was coming over him, but he didn't feel afraid. He kissed Ivan with everything he had, but soon tensed up as he felt Ivan's tongue enter his mouth. He had no idea what was going on, but he let Ivan do what he wanted. He found it odd to have a tongue in his mouth, but at the same time he was starting to like it. Alfred could feel Ivan trying to get him to participate and he felt shy trying to mimic Ivan. He pushed his tongue forward gently, feeling like his heart would explode if he moved too quickly. Ivan let out a weak laugh at Alfred's attempt and started to rub circles into Alfred's back to sooth him. Alfred eventually began to relax and move his tongue with more confidence, and brushed the roof of Ivan's mouth it. The second he did the alpha groaned deeply and bucked into Alfred. Alfred was not prepared for that or the feeling of Ivan's crotch bucking into him and pulled back quickly.

"Oh Gods!" he panted as he held onto Ivan tightly. He felt like he'd collapse if he let go.

Ivan felt his face burning as he looked at Alfred panting and clinging to him. He knew he had gotten carried away, but he couldn't help it.

"Sorry," he said softly and Alfred just blushed.

"N-No, it's fine. I'm okay…. Just wasn't ready for that," he said with a weak grin on his face.

"We should slow down," Ivan said, knowing it was for the best.

Alfred nodded his head in agreement then stepped back from Ivan, finally feeling okay enough to stand on his own.

"So, um… Y-You want to go to the kitchen and get a snack?" Alfred asked, unsure of what to really say and still a little hot under the collar.

Ivan just smiled at him and nodded his head.

"I would like that."

* * *

*****Well** that was a trip lol. The next chapter will be less intense but with a dash of angst as the boys conclude their time in Sunre. I hope you guys enjoyed the chapter and the story so far! Reviews welcomed and I'll see yall next Wednesday!

 *****Also** SPECIAL THANKS TO MY BAE TANGERINE_FORGETMENOT! She's such a great friend to put up with my ass and edit my horrible stories xp


	6. Chapter 6

** Chapter 6  
**

୨.❀.୧

When Alfred woke up to the sun shining on his face, he stayed where he lay, staring unseeing at the wall. He knew what today was, a day he had dreaded for so long, but now… now he seemed a little excited for it. Today, was his last day in Sunre. Tomorrow, when the sun rose, Alfred's family, Ivan, and himself, would be going to Owleta. Then after a day of rest they would be wedded, crowned, and then locked in a bedroom for a week. Alfred dug his fingers into his bed as he thought about this. He wasn't sure if he'd be ready when the time came, but he couldn't freak himself out now. He had to be calm. Kissing Ivan was amazing in and of itself, so perhaps sex for the first time would be even better… hopefully.

Alfred sighed as he tried to ease his beating heart, then rolled over to look up at his ceiling. His eyes traced the dark blue and silver swirls that decorated it, a numbing distraction that never failed.

"Your Highness, breakfast is ready."

Alfred looked to his door then sat up as he placed a hand over his heart. He knew if he left his room he'd be facing Ivan, his future husband, his future father of his children.

 _'Oh Gods, why must this happen so soon?'_ Alfred whined internally _. 'Am I really ready for this? My first real heat, and with Ivan?'_

"Your Highness?"

The knob jiggled as the servant tried to open it, which brought Alfred from his internal struggle.

"C-Coming!" Alfred shouted, though he winced from the stutter.

_'Keep it together. Do not freak out. It's not even tomorrow yet, just enjoy today and worry later.'_

Alfred took a few deep breaths before he felt calm enough to get out of bed. He washed himself in his personal washroom, enjoying a bath in the impressive space. The floor sparkled from the morning sun pouring in from a series of large windows overlooking the kingdom. He then dressed in tight white pants that had a green stripe down the outer seam, followed by a loose, almost-sheer white shirt that had a green belt to tie around his waist. He quickly combed his hair and applied his usual makeup before finally leaving his room. He kept his mind pleasantly blank as he walked to the dining hall, and once he arrived his father greeted him.

"There he is, finally out of bed," he said with a teasing smile.

"Don't tease, you know you are no better, my love," Francine retorted with a grin of her own.

Arthur just laughed softly, then Francine looked to her son, "Are you feeling alright dear?" she asked, knowing that Alfred could start his heat anytime now. Alfred knew this as well and blushed faintly as he nodded his head.

"Yes, Mother, I'm alright. I just didn't feel like getting up is all," he replied as he took his seat between his brother and Ivan.

"That's good, but don't hesitate to call for me or a servant," she advised and Alfred just nodded his head again. He wished he didn't have to have this conversation in front of Ivan, even if it sounded vague. It made him feel extremely self-conscious, and Ivan—being as in tuned to Alfred's distress as ever—knew this. He nudged Alfred gently, making him look to his right, and smiled at him.

"Would you like to go riding today?" Ivan asked. "We could have a picnic."

The idea sounded wonderful to Alfred, being able to tour his home one last time was perfect.

"I'd like that."

୨.❀.୧

The rest of breakfast went by with light conversation about what tomorrow held. They discussed the two day long carriage ride to Owleta, and how the ceremonies would be done the day after their rehearsal. The talk only made Alfred more nervous and he mentally breathed a sigh of relief when his mother had to leave to tend to a last minute wedding adjustment. It was that moment that Alfred excused himself as well and took off, though Ivan was close behind.

"Are you alright?" Ivan asked upon catching up to Alfred.

"Y-Yes?" Alfred said uncertain as he kept walking.

"That sounded like a question," Ivan pointed out.

Alfred stopped in front of a large window the instant Ivan said this, then heaved a heavy sigh as he turned to look at Ivan. The man stood at a respectful distance from him, looking concerned yet stoic all at once. Alfred hated how handsome he looked with that expression on his face.

"I'm just nervous," he admitted then moved to sit on the window sill.

"So am I," Ivan confessed as he sat beside Alfred.

Alfred looked out the corner of his eye when he heard that then scoffed.

"Sure you are."

Ivan frowned slightly but didn't let Alfred's tone get to him.

"I am telling the truth. I'm nervous that I will do something wrong during the ceremonies. I'm nervous that I won't be enough for you or the kingdom." Ivan said with a pale blush staining his face.

Alfred gawked at Ivan when he said this then blushed a little out of embarrassment. He hadn't thought Ivan could feel that way, that he could feel as uncertain as him.

"I'm sure you will do well during the ceremonies, we will be practicing it once we arrive at your castle. And, I know you will be enough for your kingdom, and be more than enough for me," Alfred said a bit shyly. "I have never been with anyone, unlike you… I don't know if I will be ready."

Ivan felt his chest swell as Alfred spoke and moved to hold Alfred's hands in his own. He caressed Alfred’s hands and sighed as he felt the scar on Alfred’s right palm.

"I understand, and I promise you that I will do my best. I don't want to hurt you or scare you again, moye solnyshko," Ivan said with a soft smile on his face. Alfred stared at Ivan blankly when he heard Ivan speak in his own language. He rarely heard it, but he knew what he had said. It made him blush deeply and he couldn't find it in himself to keep eye contact. Ivan was confused by Alfred's reaction at first, but then he realized what he had said and the fact that Alfred did know his language made it even worse. "Sorry, I did not know that I said that aloud, yes?" Ivan said shyly. Alfred just bit his lip then moved to give Ivan a quick kiss on the lips.

"Don't apologize," he said still blushing. "And thank you for easing my nerves."

Ivan felt like his heart was going to pop out of his chest.

"N-Nyet thanks—I mean, no thanks needed." He breathed a heavy sigh after he said this and Alfred couldn't help but laugh a little at him. Ivan just smiled crookedly then leaned in to kiss Alfred, making him fall silent. It was a simple chaste kiss, that didn't last very long. When they pulled apart Ivan smiled at Alfred, feeling calm once more. "Come, let's gather supplies for our date." Alfred nodded dazedly then stood up with Ivan as he led the way.

They went to Ivan's room to grab a blanket and two throw pillows then went for the kitchen. There they found a picnic basket and loaded it up with dishes while the chef prepared their food. Once it was packed and strapped closed they headed to the stables just a ways from the garden. They had gone riding before and Ivan knew which horses liked him and which ones didn't, unlike before. It had been a messy but fun day when they had went riding the first time, but today he wanted to avoid being thrown off. He selected a horse named Midnight, an all-black stallion, and Alfred chose his loyal companion, Warrior, a golden horse speckled with white.

The two set off from the stables and beyond the palace walls, racing through the hills that boarded the kingdom. They soon came to a river that leaked from the forest and split the kingdom. They jumped it for fun then settled near its bank to have their picnic. They unloaded their horses and laid out the blanket and pillows before sitting down and unpacking the basket, giving the horses a few carrots and apples before enjoying their own lunch. The view they had was from the top of a hill, the river was wide and slithered down into the kingdom. The hot July sun made the kingdom glitter like the river, but a cool breeze kept the heat at bay.

"It is so beautiful here," Ivan commented as he sipped the wine they had brought with them.

"I know, it's one of my favorite spots," Alfred replied as he lay back on a pillow and took a deep breath of the fresh air. "Hard to believe that this will be the last time I get to see it. Well, for a while anyway," he commented as he looked at the blue sky.

Ivan hummed at hearing this, realizing that what Alfred had said was true. Tomorrow they would be heading to his kingdom in the mountains, a kingdom not nearly as beautiful as Alfred's—but maybe, with Alfred as his queen, it would be.

Ivan looked over to Alfred to see him looking completely relaxed, his eyes closed behind his glasses, arms folded behind his head of gold, and legs stretched out. Ivan felt his heart racing as usual as he looked at him, making him feel something he thought he'd never get to have. The prince moved over to Alfred and hovered above his face. Alfred could feel the shade that Ivan caused and opened his eyes a little to see the man above him. He instantly found himself in a staring match with Ivan, but he easily won it when Ivan closed his eyes and dipped down to kiss him.

Alfred unfolded his arms to dig his fingers into Ivan's hair, holding the man closer to him. The kisses were soft and slow, but soon the angle that Ivan was at was becoming a problem. Alfred nudged Ivan to get parallel to him, making the other prince get between Alfred's legs. Both of them blushed as they repositioned, but tried to calm themselves when they started to kiss once more.

Ivan wrapped Alfred in his arms, as Alfred held onto him, and kissed him deeply—stealing his breath and making him moan softly. Alfred arched into Ivan as he kissed back hungrily, not wanting to part for a second. They kissed each other as if they couldn't get enough, eager and urgent. Both their hearts raced in their chest and butterflies filled their stomachs. Ivan felt like he would burst when he felt Alfred's tongue touch his own. He kissed back without hesitation, melting in Alfred's embrace, but tried to keep some control of their kiss. It soon came to a point when neither could ignore the burning in their lungs and pulled apart to breath deeply. Ivan stared at Alfred under him, mesmerized by the labored breath, blush stained face, and crooked glasses. Ivan couldn't take his eyes off of him and before he knew it he said, "I love you."

Alfred still breathed raggedly, but he became as still as he possibly could. He was completely taken off guard by Ivan's soft words. He didn't know what to say in return and the more he looked up at Ivan the harder it became for him to think.

"Y-You do?" Alfred stammered out a little worried.

Ivan blushed a darker shade of red but nodded his head.

"Yes, I… I don't think I should try to hide it. You are just so beautiful and amazing that I could not help but admit it. We have only been together for a month, but I feel so comfortable with you," Ivan blurted out.

Alfred was silent and averted his eyes, completely overwhelmed. "But you don't have to say anything, Alfred," Ivan said, not missing the changes in Alfred's demeanor. "I probably should not have said anything," he mumbled, then moved to get off of Alfred. However, the second he moved Alfred grabbed onto him, making him freeze.

"Wait, Ivan… I…." Alfred then pushed Ivan back a little, allowing himself to sit up and look at the man. "I… I don't know what to say. I, want to say those words back to you but I'm just… uncertain. I don't want to say them and they not be true," Alfred admitted. "I like you, I know that, but I have never experienced love, I don't know what it feels like or looks like. Mattie has told me, I will know when the time comes, and I'm hoping that he is right because I really do like you."

Ivan was silent, making Alfred worry that he had done something wrong. He was ready to apologize when Ivan suddenly leaned in for a quick kiss then let his forehead rest against Alfred's.

"I understand moye solnyshko," Ivan said softly. "Love is tricky and I know how you feel. I felt like that once. I can wait, do not worry."

Alfred felt his heart skip at hearing the endearment then pulled Ivan close in an embrace. Ivan smiled at the contact and squeezed Alfred back, but then was pulled back by Alfred, who smiled at him brightly.

"Thank you," was all Alfred said before lunging at Ivan, pushing him to the earth and kissing him.

Ivan laughed as he was peppered with kisses then rolled over to pin Alfred down to kiss him back. However, Alfred wasn't going to let that happen so easily. Their bout of romance become a child's game of wrestling, something that Alfred proved to be a bit better at from all his years of wrestling his twin. Ivan soon admitted defeat, but he quickly suggested a race for a new challenge. Alfred, not one to turn down any challenge, accepted it. They hurriedly got off the ground, packed their picnic, and got onto their horses to race to the palace. They shouted teasing remarks as they raced, but once they arrived at the palace the winner could not be determined, or so Alfred said once he dismounted.

"It was a tie and you know it!" Alfred declared as they put their horses back in their stables.

"I know that is what you want to believe," Ivan said with a smirk on his face.

Alfred scoffed and turned his back to Ivan. "If anything, I won. I know Warrior is the fastest there is."

Ivan chuckled at seeing Alfred so childishly and moved quietly to sneak up on the blond. He wrapped his arms around Alfred from behind, making him jump a little. "Oh really now?" Ivan asked.

"Yes," Alfred stated as he calmed his beating heart, but didn't relax into Ivan's hold.

Ivan grinned and moved his lips to Alfred's neck. "I think you are a sore loser, Alfred," Ivan said, making Alfred shiver. Alfred tried to act defiant, but with Ivan on his back, it was very, very difficult.

"I'm just prideful," Alfred retorted then moved to turn around in Ivan's hold and press him up against one the stall doors. "And you are a snake," he added as he jabbed a finger into Ivan's chest.

Ivan's smirk never left his face as he looked at the riled up prince. "How am I a snake?" he asked innocently.

"You are trying to seduce me," Alfred said without hesitation as a smile came to his face.

Ivan laughed softly and moved a hand to Alfred's cheek to hold his head up. "You don't like that?" he asked as he leaned towards Alfred. Alfred knew what Ivan was planning and smirked as he pressed himself into Ivan more.

"Tease."

"Perhaps," Ivan replied then went to close the gap between them, but the sound of footsteps stopped them. They quickly pulled apart as a man close to Ivan's age came in with a small cart of oat bags. The man froze when he caught sight of the two royals and quickly bowed his head.

"I-I'm sorry to disturb you, Your Highnesses."

"N-No, it's fine, we were just leaving," Alfred said quickly and grabbed Ivan's hand. "Please, continue your work."

The man nodded his head but kept it bowed as Alfred and Ivan made their escape. They walked quickly towards the palace, not saying a word until they were within the palace walls.

"Wow, that was close," Alfred said with a sigh as he slowed down to a casual walk.

Ivan raised an eyebrow at this and said, "Would it have been bad that he saw us? They know we are to be wed."

Alfred stopped walking and looked at Ivan. "Yes, it would have," he said. "I don't want others to see me like that, only you."

Silence overcame them both as Alfred's words sunk in and as Ivan smiled, Alfred blushed. "I-I mean, I just don't think it's right to be indecent in public!"

Ivan scoffed at hearing that. "You was fully clothed Alfred, though that could have been different. However, I would not want anyone to see you naked—you are mine, after all," Ivan said, possessiveness clear in his tone.

"Hah! I'm not yours just yet," Alfred defended and Ivan just shrugged his shoulder.

"You technically are, my dear, ring or not," came a soothing voice.

Alfred turned his attention from Ivan to the woman heading right for them.

"M-Mother!" Alfred couldn't help the blush that appeared on his face from being caught.

The Queen smiled at him knowingly then looked at Ivan.

"You two have been wrestling I see," she said noting the grass stains on both their clothing. "And here I thought you had grown out of that Alfred," she said then added, "Or perhaps you two have—"

"Mother! No!" Alfred said quickly, embarrassment flooding his chest and stomach.

Francine laughed softly then reached out to pat her son the head.

"I'm only teasing," she said then looked up at Ivan, noting that he was blushing as well. "Oh, you two are just adorable," she said, making Alfred groan and cover his face.

"Mother, if you don't mind, Ivan and I have things to do," he said then tried to escape his mother with Ivan in tow, but she stopped them.

"I'm sorry, but that will have to wait," she said, making Alfred frown slightly. "I need you for your final fitting."

" _Now?_ "

"Yes, now. The ceremony is in four days, after all. Now say goodbye and come along," Francine ordered as she stepped away to give them some privacy.

Alfred sighed deeply then turned to Ivan.

"Do not look so sad moye solnyshko. It's not like I won't see you again," Ivan said with a smile on his face.

"I know, but today is our last day here and…." Alfred trialed off then looked over his shoulder to see his mother waiting, then looked back at Ivan. "Hey… tonight, I want you to come to my room," he said a hushed voice.

Ivan wide-eyed at hearing this, a part of him disbelieving that he heard what he had.

"R-Really?" he asked struggling to keep his voice low due to his surprise.

Alfred just nodded then blushed slightly.

"If you can't, it's okay, but I do wish for you to come."

Ivan stared at Alfred openly for a moment. The possible reasons behind Alfred's offer running rampant in his head.

"Yes! I will," he said a bit too loudly then coughed as he tried to reign himself in. "I will be there."

"Good, I will leave my door unlocked for you. See you tonight," Alfred said with a smile then turned to walk up to his mother.

Ivan watched the two walk away, but all he could think about was Alfred's offer.

୨.❀.୧

The night was young, but Ivan couldn't wait much longer and left his room. He had been pacing in the large space for what seemed like years as he waited for everyone else to go to bed. He was eager to get to Alfred but nervous as well. He didn't know what to expect, it could be to talk at the wedding, spend time together, or even sex… but… that last one couldn't possibly happen. They had only kissed and Alfred was still uncertain about his true feelings after all. But if it was, then perhaps Alfred was going into heat early?

 _'Don't be foolish, you would have known that,"_ Ivan chided himself. _"What could this be about?'_ he asked himself as he stood before Alfred's door.

He wanted an answer badly, just a hint before he opened the door, but he knew that wasn't going to happen. Ivan took a deep breath to calm his heart then gently turned the knob. He opened the door slightly and peeked inside to see Alfred sitting on his bed reading a book. Ivan felt relief wash over him at the sight of the blonde clothed, but an equal part of him was disappointed by that.

"Ivan," Alfred said looking up from his book and smiling shyly, "Come in before someone sees you!"

Ivan nodded and quickly stepped into the room and closed the door. He stood with his back pressed against the wood and tried to hide his nerves by looking around the room. The room was lit dimly by a few candles and was cleaner than he thought it would be. There were some clothes pouring out of the closet but not scattered about, books were neatly stacked, paper was crumbled on the floor by a desk, bookcases were somewhat organized.

"Ivan."

Ivan brought his attention to Alfred and saw him pat the bed, signaling him to come sit. Ivan nodded and tried to keep his composure as he walked over then sat down on the edge of the mattress.

"Don't be so nervous," Alfred said, though he was saying it for himself as well. He didn't know what he was thinking when he asked Ivan to come to his room. But he couldn't just take back his offer.

Ivan could tell that Alfred was nervous as well, the smell of it was a big clue, though he hadn't noticed it until now. He let out a heavy sigh then rubbed the back of his neck.

"Sorry, I have been wondering why you asked me to come here and I just overthink," Ivan admitted.

Alfred smiled a little at hearing that and placed his bookmark in his book before closing it.

"I understand. Truthfully don't know why I called you here either…" Alfred confessed. Ivan hummed at hearing that, his heart relaxing more. "But I want you here," Alfred said quickly. "Perhaps we can just lie together and read?" he suggested as he held up the book he had been reading.

Ivan couldn't say no to that, and moved to scoot up more on the bed, but Alfred held up his hand.

"Your boots are still on. I don't want your dirt on my bed," he teased making Ivan roll his eyes.

"Oh, I'm so sorry Your Highness," Ivan said then took off his boots. He set them aside then smirked as he grabbed his shirt. "Should I undress so my clothing doesn't dirty your bed as well?" he asked with a mischievous grin. Alfred blushed deeply and shook his head.

"N-No, I mean… unless you want to…" he mumbled, but didn't take his eyes off of Ivan. "I'm only in a nightgown…" he added.

Ivan swallowed thickly at hearing that but nodded his head. He unbuttoned his vest and set it aside, but nothing more, and moved to sit back on the pillows. Alfred then sat beside him, only an inch gap between them as he opened his book.

"What is your book about?" Ivan asked before Alfred started to read.

"It's a fairy tale," Alfred said then leaned closer to let Ivan see the pages. "It's about a prince trying to get the life of his princess back from an evil warlock." Alfred flipped through the pages to show a picture of the warlock and prince. A haggard old man dressed in a purple cloak and a white beard stood over a begging prince. "The prince can only get his love's life back if he gives up his vision, which is pure and valuable like gold."

Alfred skipped a few more pages to show an illustration of a prince with black sockets and a smile on his face as he is held by his princess who cries for him.

"What a tragedy," Ivan said softly as he looked at the picture.

"Yeah, but beautiful," said Alfred. "To love someone so much to give up something so precious, it's something I have always wanted… Well, I could do without the death part."

"Even without death, giving up your sight would be devastating," Ivan replied. "Not being able to see the one you love ever again, only able to touch… that cannot be enough."

Alfred hummed as he thought this over then closed his book and sat up. He turned to face Ivan then took off his glasses and folded them gently. Ivan felt his heart melt at seeing Alfred without his glasses for the first time. He looked slightly more feminine without them, but what struck Ivan most was the freckles that dusted Alfred's checks and nose like stars and the vibrant blue eyes that looked only at him.

"To me, you look like a hazy cloud," Alfred said, bringing Ivan from his stupor. "I cannot see any detail of you other than you are a shade of white."

"Really?" Ivan asked as he looked at Alfred. He couldn't image seeing the world like Alfred did, nothing but a colorful haze.

"Yes. Even if I squint, it doesn't really help," Alfred answered. "I suppose if I had to see you like this all the time, without the aid of my glasses, I'd get a little sad, maybe even angry. To live without knowing how you look as you age or see the smile or frown on your face… but I think I'd get over it because I know that you are alive and beside me always."

Silence was Ivan's response to Alfred's words, which made the blond blush faintly. Alfred felt grateful that he couldn't see Ivan at that moment because he couldn't take much more embarrassment. He hadn't meant to say all of that, but he couldn't help it. He tried to think of something to smooth over their conversation, but Ivan had other ideas. Alfred felt him grab his arm gently and pull him close, the fuzzy image of Ivan becoming crystal clear once their noses were only a few inches apart.

"Can you see me now?" Ivan asked a look of an emotion that Alfred couldn't even being to comprehend written on his features.

"Y-Yes, you are as clear as you are when I wear my glasses," Alfred answered.

"Good." Ivan then moved to close the small gap, kissing Alfred deeply. Alfred gasped into the kiss but didn't pull away, enjoying it fully. When the kiss ended Ivan took Alfred's glasses from his hands and placed them on his face. "Always look at me through these moye solnyshko."

Alfred blushed at hearing the request but gave a slight nod. "It's not like I can see anything else without them," Alfred justified making Ivan smile.

"I know," he said happily and wrapped an arm around Alfred, holding him close. "Now, how about we finish your fairy tale?"

* * *

**Translations:**

moye solnyshko – my sunshine

Nyet - No

 ******* See yall next week!


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7.1**

୨.❀.୧

When Alfred woke up he found himself pressed against something warm and soft. He blinked slowly as the haze of sleep lifted from him, and sighed deeply as he tightened his hold on the object beside him. Said object didn't react at all, only caving in slightly from the grip Alfred had on it. Alfred frowned slight from the little resistance and grunted softly as he tried to figure out why it didn't feel right. The memories of the day before came to him like a boat on a lazy river.

"Ivan?" he murmured, but he didn't receive a response. It was strange, considering that he could smell Ivan beside him, but as he pried open a blue eye he found that he was holding onto a pillow and not a body. He frowned at the realization and sat up in bed with a huff before grabbing his glasses. He slipped them on then stretched his body before looking around his room. No one was there but him.

"Where did he go?" Alfred asked the room.

Instead of a response, there was a sudden knock at the door. It surprised the prince but he didn't move from his bed.

"What?" he asked, not caring for politeness.

"Your Highness, you are finally awake!" came a relieved voice of a servant. "Please, hurry and dress! Today you will be traveling to Owleta!"

"I will?" Alfred asked loudly so the servant could hear.

"Yes! Everyone is waiting on you! You are to be wedded and crowned in a few days' time!"

Alfred licked his lips as he listened to the servant then gasped as it finally clicked.

"Damn it all!" Alfred shouted then quickly got of the bed. "How could I have forgotten?"

He scrambled to get dressed and quickly unlocked and opened his door. The servant that had spoken to him was still there and told him to go to the dining hall while they packed his things. Alfred thanked them and ran off to join his family and Ivan.

"Seems you have finally joined the living, my son," Arthur commented as Alfred entered the dining hall.

"Sorry!" Alfred said quickly then took his seat next to Ivan.

"Just hurry and eat, the carriages are almost ready to go," said Arthur.

Alfred could only nod and started to eat the food before him, but paused when he felt someone nudge him. He looked to his right to see Ivan smiling at him and Alfred felt his face heat up at the sight of the alpha. Alfred looked away and grabbed his cup to wash down the food in his mouth the looked back at Ivan.

"You left me," Alfred whispered.

"I know, but I did not think it would be wise to stay," Ivan answered softly.

Alfred pouted, but knew Ivan was right. It wouldn't have looked good if they had been discovered sleeping together, innocently as they were—especially when they hadn't been wedded yet.

"You know I'm right," Ivan teased, making Alfred stick out his tongue then go back to eating. Ivan just chuckled softly and tuned in to what the king was discussing.

"The carriage ride will take two days," Arthur was saying. "Once we arrive we will have a day to rest, then the ceremony will begin."

"Oh, it has been while since we journeyed as a family," Francine said with a sigh. "You boys were just little things then."

"Mother, please," Alfred and Matthew said in unison.

Francine laughed softly at her children but relented. At that moment one of the advisor entered the room and addressed Arthur.

"My King, the carriages are ready and the knights are waiting."

Arthur nods to the man then moves to get up. "Alright, let's get going, shall we?"

Everyone agreed and went about taking care of any last minute needs before climbing into the carriages. The carriages were a shade of blue that mimicked the morning sky over Sunre. It was large enough to seat six and lined with a burnt orange silk on the inside, giving the feeling of being surrounded by sunlight. The King and Queen had one carriage, accompanied by their advisor and a guard. The three Princes had the second, also accompanied by a guard. Once seated, the knights surrounded their carriages and began the journey to Owleta.

Alfred watched his home pass him by then turned in his seat to see his kingdom grow smaller and smaller as the distance grew.

_'I'm actually leaving…. I'm actually going to go marry Ivan… have his children… be Queen of Owleta…'_

Alfred's emotions were a muddled mess as he thought about this. He felt nervous about his future; he felt frightened of what he would face once in Owleta; he felt happy to be with Ivan; but most of all, he felt saddened to leave his home and his family.

"Alfred?"

Alfred turned to see his brother looking at him with concern then to Ivan. He sniffled a bit then turned back around and rubbed at his eyes as he sat down.

"I'm alright, nothing to fret over," he said with a smile that didn't quite reach his eyes.

Ivan didn't like it, but he didn't feel it was right to press Alfred for the truth. He figured Alfred would react some way upon leaving his home, so all he did was take Alfred's hand in his own to comfort him. Alfred tensed at the touch, but then relaxed and squeezed Ivan's hand.

The journey was long and boring, although Matthew did bring a few books along for the ride—which helped, but not by much. The true reprieve from the journey were the breaks and when night fell, making camp. They cooked their food on a campfire, told tall tales and old history. The stories the knights provided thoroughly entertained everyone as they sat under the stars. When it was time for bed, the royals slept in their carriages for safety, and the knights took turns watching over them. There had been a village or two along their route, but they couldn't bring themselves to impose on such small villages.

On the second and last day of their trip, it was obvious when they had reached Owleta. The landscape morphed into high forests and massive mountains, stone and dirt pathways lead into the kingdom, and the temperature become considerable chilled. It was late evening when they arrived and Alfred felt unease as they passed through stone archways of a wide tunnel to enter the valley that the kingdom was located in.

The setting sun painted the valley in shades of orange and red and casted the shadow of the mountains upon it as well. It was an interesting view, but it wasn't as brilliant as the sunsets in Sunre. Alfred found the kingdom to be massive, but dark and cold. There wasn't much color to the kingdom, only simple and dull hues, but the only pops of true color came from the kingdom flags. They sported the Braginsky crest of orange and purple, decorated with the standing bears, antlers, and swords. It somehow made the kingdom almost look otherworldly, but it still didn't ease Alfred.

As they entered the kingdom, they walked onto a bridge that split into left and right over the river that ran down the middle of the valley. The turned left and made their way through the kingdom to get to the castle. The villagers looked at the carriages with curious, fearful, or indifferent eyes. Alfred felt his stomach knot as they got closer to the castle, he could honestly say that he was simply afraid. Seeing Owleta for the first time reminded him of the rumors he had heard, and as the imposing structure of Ivan's castle came upon them, he wondered if a dragon really did live underneath it after all.

"Relax, there is nothing to fear," Ivan said softly.

Alfred tried to do calm down but his nerves wouldn't let go that easily. Ivan could see this clearly and moved to place a kiss on Alfred's cheek without anyone seeing. Alfred settled down then and took a deep breath.

 _'This place can't be too bad since Ivan is so charming. Just give it a chance,'_ Alfred thought to himself.

"Thank you," he whispered as he looked at Ivan.

"Anything for you, moy solnyshko."

The carriage soon came to a stop at a large staircase leading up to the castle doors. Knights lined the staircase and two woman stood atop the stairs, one of them waving animatedly as Ivan stepped out of the carriage with Alfred. Ivan smiled at his older sister and gave a small wave back, before turning his attention back to Alfred who clung to his hand. Matthew was soon behind him and the King and Queen emerged as well, and the group ascended the stairs to meet their hosts.

"Welcome to our home," said the older sister as she smiled brightly. "I am Katyusha, Princess of Owleta and Empress of Tuss." She then nudged the thinner woman beside her, who seemed reluctant to speak.

"Yes, welcome," she said with very little enthusiasm. "I am Princess Natalia of Owleta."

"Good eve' Princesses," Arthur said with a smile as he bowed slightly. "It has been many years since I have seen you both."

"It has," Katyusha agreed with a nod of her head. She then looked to her brother who stood with the twins, but she could tell which one Alfred was.

"It is nice to meet you Prince Alfred and Prince Matthew."

"Likewise," Matthew said with a smile then elbowed his brother to make him speak.

"Yes, it is nice to finally meet you," Alfred said quickly.

Katyusha nodded her head in agreement then smiled at her brother to acknowledge him.

"Come, we have a meal prepared for you and rooms as well. You must be eager to rest after your journey." She said then began to lead everyone inside. Upon doing so she spoke once more, "My apologies, but the King will not be joining us. He does wish to greet you in the morning however."

"That is quite alright," Arthur said with a nod of understanding.

"Yes, there is no need to push himself. How is he doing these days, if you don't mind me asking?" Francine asked as she began to follow Katyusha into the castle.

"He is… still bedridden, but not in pain," was all she said.

Alfred found himself looking to Ivan when he heard this, but found no emotion. No anger, sadness, worry, just cold indifference. It was disturbing to see such lack of emotion on Ivan after seeing so much of it written on the man's face for a month. He didn't know Ivan's father well, but he hoped that Ivan would be okay as they walked through the castle. Alfred held Ivan's hand tightly to ease the man a little, and felt relieved when the cold look melted and Ivan's eyes fell onto him. Ivan smiled softly and squeezed Alfred's hand then looked forward once more. Alfred did as well, but his gaze was caught by décor of the castle. It was completely different from his palace—portraits of members of the Owletan court decorated the wall, each one holding a cold stare. Suits of armor and candelabras decorated the halls in between elaborately decorated windows. The color grey was prominent in the stone structure, but tapestries and banners added enough color to make the castle just a little inviting. The dining room wasn't much better when they arrived. The room was massive and had sheer curtains over large windows. A large dining table was center in the room and adorned with candles, dishes, and a varieties of foods for the arrival of its guests. The scent of the food was foreign but delicious to Alfred, and for Ivan it smelt like home. He could tell from the scents alone that his sisters must have asked the chef to make his favorites.

"Please, take any seat you like," Katyusha informed as they approached the table.

"It looks marvelous," Arthur commented as he pulled out a seat for his wife.

"Thank you, our chef, Toris, is quite talented," Katyusha informed as she took a seat across from Arthur and Francine.

Matthew took his seat beside their mother and Alfred followed suite. Ivan placed himself on the other side with his sisters, but sat directly in front of Alfred. It was this seating arrangement that allowed Alfred to see the Braginsky siblings fully. There was no mistaking their relation to each other, each one of them had the skin of a porcelain doll, however, Katyusha seemed to have some color, as well as Ivan, no doubt from sun they were exposed to. It made sense since Katyusha was living in Tuss, ruling alongside the Emperor Sadik. Alfred had heard stories of the large empire—vast lands, sand, and strange and dangerous creatures lurked under the hot sun.

The youngest sibling, Natalia, still had the porcelain skin that Ivan once had when he first arrived to Sunre. But unlike Ivan, Natalia was all sharp angles and crisp lines. Her long hair ran down her back with a slight curl towards the end, but the bangs over her eyes were straight and trimmed. A crisp blue bow sat in her fair hair and her dark blue eyes stared right back at Alfred. He shivered when their eyes met and quickly looked away. He didn't know what would happen if he kept looking and he wasn't interested in finding out.

For the rest of the meal Alfred kept his eyes mostly on his food, but every so often he'd look up at Ivan. He couldn't help the anxious flutter in his stomach as he looked at Ivan eat quietly and chat with Katyusha and his parents. He wanted to have Ivan's attention so badly, to spend a little time alone. It was selfish, but he hadn't had a chance to be alone with Ivan ever since they left his palace. He could only hope they'd get some time together before it was time for bed.

Eventually dinner was concluded and Katyusha called for a servant to escort the Kirkland family to their rooms. However, this didn't stop Ivan from tagging along, even though Natalia seemed ready to snatch Ivan at a moment's notice. As they were lead through the castle halls the King and Queen admired the castle and Mattie observed, but Alfred lagged behind with Ivan by his side.

"I know it is not as… lively as your home, but I hope you like it here," Ivan said.

"I think I could come to love it," Alfred replied honestly then leaned into Ivan. Ivan gave a soft smile and slyly placed a hand on the small of Alfred's back. Alfred felt his heart race from the touch and had an urge to kiss the man. "Ivan… are your rooms… close to ours by chance?" Alfred asked a bit shyly.

"Perhaps…" Ivan replied. "Is there… something you wish to do?" he asked feeling a little anxious.

Alfred smiled nervously at the question and looked away from Ivan in time to see his family stop far down the hall. He then stopped himself, making Ivan do the same, and quickly said, "I want to kiss you, but once everyone is in their rooms."

Ivan had a grin come to his lips as he heard Alfred's request.

"Really?" he asked as he pulled Alfred closer to him.

"Yes," Alfred said through a laugh then pulled away from Ivan before anyone saw.

"Alright, I will be back later," Ivan answered. "Don't fall asleep."

Alfred scoffed at the very idea then started walking as he said, "I would never."

Ivan shook his head at the blonde, but followed him until they joined Alfred's family down the hall.

"So nice of you to join us, Alfred," Matthew teased.

"Oh stop Matthew," Francine chided then looked at her other son and his soon-to-be husband. "Can you not see that love is at work? You have grown so quickly," Francine commented, making Alfred and Ivan both uncomfortable, and Arthur just cleared his throat and wrapped an arm around his wife.

"Francine, I believe it is too late to be embarrassing them. Come to bed."

"It is never too late to weep from pride, but alright my love." She sighed and let Arthur usher her into their room for the night as Arthur bid their sons and Ivan good night.

Once their door was closed Matthew had a mischievous grin come to his face, making Alfred go on guard.

"Oh, relax brother of mine," Matthew practically purred. "I'm just amused, after all, love is at work."

"Will you shut it Matthew!" Alfred hissed making Matthew laugh as he escaped to his bedroom. "He is as embarrassing as Mother," Alfred huffed then stalked off to his own room, but before he could even turn the knob a hand fell on his shoulder.

"Did you forget about me already?" Ivan asked, voice filled with amusement.

Alfred laughed nervously and turned to look at Ivan.

"N-Not at all! I just wanted to get into my room already," Alfred defended.

Ivan gave a knowing look then moved his hand to cradle Alfred's chin.

"You are terrible with lying." He said in a hushed voice, making Alfred realize how close he had gotten.

"I-Ivan, wait… They could still com—"

Alfred's words where cut short as Ivan sealed his lips in a kiss. Alfred found himself stepping back into the door and reaching up to hold onto Ivan's shirt. Ivan smirked into the kiss at seeing how easily Alfred gave up his fight. He moved his hand to cup Alfred's cheek and the other rested on his hip. Ivan deepened the kiss at that moment, making Alfred gasp and pull away. He panted softly and bit his lower lip.

"Had enough?" Ivan teased.

"No."

Alfred was quick to kiss Ivan, holding him close as he slipped his tongue into his mouth. It was still an odd sensation, but he enjoyed it each time they did it. But their heated kisses where halted when the sound of footsteps came down the hall. They froze instantly and turned to see no one there, but whoever it was was close to rounding the corner and seeing them. This realization made them both pull away from each other and Alfred fumbled with getting his door open. The second he managed to the turn the knob and push, he slipped inside and went to grab Ivan to pull him inside, but Ivan grabbed his hand.

"Not tonight. I will see you in the morning yes?"

Alfred felt his excitement wilt a little but he nodded his head. Ivan smiled at him and quickly leaned in to kiss Alfred's forehead then grabbed the knob to close the door. Alfred sighed as he stared at the door and listened to Ivan move quickly down the hall. Alfred wondered who had interrupted them, and had half a mind to peek outside his door, but a larger part of him just wanted to lie down. The day had been a long one and the little excitement he had had worn him out.

He sighed and turned to face his room and found one candle burning by a canopy bed. He moved over to the massive bed and only took off his boots and glasses before blowing out the light and collapsing on the bed. He hugged a pillow tightly, curling up around it, and sighed deeply into it as he tried to calm down. He wanted to sleep but the kisses he shared with Ivan just seconds ago plagued his mind. He felt his face burning and had to lift his head up so he wouldn't feel smothered by the heat. He groaned softly, feeling embarrassed and tried to empty his mind. He didn't know how long it took, but eventually the lull of sleep took him.

* * *

*****S** orry for taking so long, but if you've been following my tumblr then yall know how work has practically destroyed my free time. Fuckin people dont want to work for shit. XC Anywho, i'm going to try and keep updating on Wednesday even though it wont be weekly. I'm still working on part 2 but hope to post it soon! Thank you all for the comments and sticking with me! I really appreciate it!


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 7.2**

୨.❀.୧

When the void of sleep finally freed Alfred, it wasn't due to a servant at his door, his brother, or even the sun shining on him. He woke up to the feeling of discomfort, and no matter which way he lay, his lower half still felt strange. With a heavy sigh he gave up the fight for sleep and sat up before putting on his glasses. It took him a second or two before he could actually open his eyes then looked down at his lap. He could still feel something wrong and pulled the covers back only to bring them back over quickly as a blush stained his face. He swallowed thickly as he tried to process what he had seen, and ended up pulling the covers back once more. When he did he blushed even more, ashamed at what he had done.

 _'Oh, Gods… Why!?'_ Alfred whined mentally as he looked at the stains he had caused during the night. The discomfort he had felt was the dried semen in his underwear, which made Alfred realize that during the night he had taken off his pants. There was so much of the substance that it had soaked through and stained the red sheets. _'It was only a kiss!'_ Alfred thought, but as he stared at the mess he knew it had to been more than a kiss. He couldn't recall much of his dream, but the feeling of pleasure was very impressionable. The touch of his hands on his body, his lips, and his cock—

 _'Stop it!'_ Alfred buried his face in his hands as he tried to clear those thoughts out his head. He could feel his body starting to react just from the vague memory of Ivan in his dream.

Alfred sighed and slumped back onto his pillows feeling more exhausted than before. He wanted to go back to sleep and forget about his dream, but the discomfort he still felt wouldn't let him do that. He knew he had to clean up his mess before a servant found it—or even worse, Ivan. With his mind made up, Alfred got out of bed and hurried to the washroom in his chambers, but paused once he stepped inside. Windows lined the far wall, giving a view of the valley in the morning sun. The orange glow lined the washroom in large rectangles, making the marble floor glitter. Large vases filled with various plant life decorated the space, and a massive claw-footed bathtub stood in the middle of the room. The room felt like an outdoor bath, just like the ones back home. Alfred couldn't help but smile and wonder if Ivan had requested this for him, but the thought of Ivan reminded Alfred of his problem. He quickly found the basin located on a counter and filled it with water from a pump before scrubbing away his shame. He didn't bother to heat it, just eager to get clean. He then took his rag to the bedroom where he scrubbed at his sheets.

Once he was satisfied, he rung out his rag to dry then went back to his bed and collapsed onto it. He planned on falling back asleep, but as he lay there he realized he felt wide awake. Alfred sighed and rolled over and stared at the ceiling, only to find he couldn't see it. A canopy of sheer gold curtains spilled over the bed, blocking his view, and was held back by red ropes. Alfred stared at the curtains for a while before taking a good look at the room, noting that it was painted in a soft red that was decorated with delicate golden flowers. Everything looked so ornate and rich with color with splashes of white. There was even a call bell, the chain dangling above the nightstand. It was odd to see such a room in a kingdom that lacked colors, but it made Alfred wonder if it was done for him, like the bathroom—or perhaps the guest bedrooms were just more vibrant to make the guests feel at home? Alfred didn't know, but a part of him felt happy with the idea that Ivan had done it just for him.

A yawn escaped his lips as he looked at the room, then rolled over to bury his face into his pillow. His thoughts of Ivan seemed to stay put, making him feel flustered but at ease all at once. He breathed deeply as he laid there, the concept of time seemed to slow just like his thoughts. He welcomed the sensation, but a knock rapped on his door. It startled Alfred from the sudden sleep he found himself falling for.

"Y-Yes?" he called out, sounding lethargic.

"Your Highness, breakfast is being served," came the voice of a servant. "Please get dressed and I will escort you."

The need for food hadn't come to Alfred's attention until that very moment, and he couldn't throw on his clothes on fast enough. When he opened his door a teenage boy lead him to his salvation—the dining room—and along the way, Alfred noticed that the castle had a bit more color than he had originally thought. It was more ornate in designs than vibrant colors, but it didn't seem as drab as it had when he arrived during the late evening.

When they approached the dining room Alfred's mind was quick to remind him of his morning troubles, and that Ivan was just on the other side of the door. He took a deep breath to steel his nerves as the servant ushered him inside. The table was nearly full with the Alfred and Ivan's families, plus a few advisors. The blonde took note of everyone there and, upon seeing Ivan, averted his eyes.

"Well, good morning Alfred. I see you are still alive," Matthew teased.

"And I see you are still annoying," Alfred bit back as he took his seat.

He avoided looking at Ivan, although a part of him just wanted a peek at the man. He shyly did so, but when he saw him Ivan looked stressed-his brow was furrowed and he kept stabbing his eggs with his fork. He didn't acknowledge the prince at first, but when his eyes did flick up to Alfred, Alfred looked away. He couldn't handle a direct look, his dream and his worries about Ivan prevented him.

 _'Did I make him mad somehow?'_ Alfred wondered then looked over to his twin.

Matthew wasn't paying him any mind, he just listened in on the conversations around the table as he ate.

"Matthew," Alfred whispered and pinched his brother's thigh softly. "Matthew, did something happen this morning?" he asked the second Matthew turned to him.

"No, not that I know of… why?" Alfred darted his eyes to Ivan and Matthew just shrugged his shoulders. "I don't know, he was like this when I arrived… Maybe it's something to do with his father? We are meeting him today," Matthew answered in a hushed voice.

Alfred frowned slightly but nodded his head and turned back to his food.

_'Could it really be about his father? Perhaps it was about last night?'_

The possibilities were endless, but the chance for answers were lost when Katyusha broke Alfred's concentration.

"I just received word that Father is ready for us."

Alfred looked up from his half-finished meal upon hearing this then looked to Ivan who seemed to get into an even darker mood, like a cloud hanging over his head.

"Very well, I am curious to see how he's doing. I do hope his condition has not worsened," Francine said as she stood with her husband.

"As do I," Katyusha said softly. "I haven't seen him very much as of late; he prefers to be left alone now."

With that, everyone rose and followed the eldest Braginsky to the bedchamber of the dying king. The walk was silent, not a word or noise uttered as they walked through the halls to face one massive door. Katyusha knocked on it softly and after a short pause it was opened from the inside, a servant bowed as they walked in and Alfred found himself looking to Ivan. The man was stiff as a board and the irritation from breakfast was gone, leaving just a blank expression. Alfred wanted to reach for his hand, but Ivan stepped away from his reach as the bed came into view.

The King's chambers were shrouded in blue, gold, and shadows. The curtains were partially drawn and the canopy bed he rested in shadowed his face, but it wasn't hard to see. The man was old, pale skin, wrinkles, and a thinning beard of white. He looked weak, the sickness that had ravaged his body left him looking hollow and dead—the bed itself looked like it had swallowed his body. But even in his state of health Alfred felt fear. He felt it in his gut as he looked at the king sitting up in his bed, held up by pillows. The man's eyes, the color of slate, held such cold intensity in his sunken features that Alfred felt he should be bowing on his knees. He could understand why people thought so ill of the Braginskys.

"Greetings. I am King Mikhail Braginsky," he said, his voice thick with his accent and raspy from perhaps a cough. It sent a chill down Alfred's back.

"Greetings, King Mikhail. It has been years since we last meet," Arthur said with a slight nod of his head.

"It has, hasn't it? You have grown some… as well as you, dear Francine," Mikhail said slowly as he looked at the young rulers. His cold eyes then moved to twins, making them both straighten up just a little more. "You two must be Alfred and Matthew."

"Yes, sir," they said in unison, the fear of not addressing the king making them quick to respond.

Mikhail studied them for a second before barely lifting his hand and pointing at Alfred.

"You, come here." Alfred swallowed thickly as he nodded and stepped forward. He darted his eyes over to Ivan to see him still expressionless, but there was tension in his jaw. He then looked back and stopped at the edge of the bed. Mikhail brought his bony hand up to touch Alfred's face and turn it from side to side. "Yes, you are Alfred. You will do just perfectly." He let go of Alfred's face, then looked to his own son. "Ivan."

Ivan stepped forward and Mikhail stared him down. "Treat this one properly. Do not disappointment me in the afterlife as well."

Ivan felt his gut twist at his father's words, but didn't say anything in response. Mikhail gave a weak wave of his hand, making Ivan take hold of Alfred's arm and pull him back from the bed. When they stepped back with the others Ivan moved his hand to Alfred's, holding it tightly. He didn't say a word and Alfred didn't either, his heart was still racing from his encounter with the king. Alfred wanted to leave as quickly as possible, and after Mikhail spoke to Natalia and Katyusha, Alfred got his wish.

"Thank you for visiting me, and thank you for accepting my offer," Mikhail said, directing his words to the King and Queen of Sunre. "Our future looks bright."

Arthur and Francine nodded in agreement then Mikhail waved for a servant to open the door. Katyusha bid her father goodbye and escorted everyone out of the room. No one said a word as they left, not until a nearby clock struck the hour.

"Oh, the rehearsal," Katyusha said then stopped in her tracks. "The rehearsal for the ceremony will be soon, but we still have some time. Would you like to tour the castle, or go to one of the many drawing rooms until it is time?" she asked the royals.

"I think a little fun would do us all good," Francine said.

"I agree," Arthur added.

Matthew nodded as well, but Ivan shook his head.

"If you do not mind, I would like to show Alfred around the castle."

Natalia looked at her brother with a glare, but he ignored her as Arthur said, "Not at all. Go, have fun."

Ivan bowed slightly and took off with a very confused Alfred down the hall.

"Ivan, what is going on?" Alfred finally asked once they were out of sight.

"Just hold on," was all Ivan would say as he led Alfred through the halls until they came to a room on the lower floor. Ivan went through with Alfred in tow, but didn't stop. He opened another door within that room and it opened up right into the gardens.

"W-What? How did we—?"

"It is a utility room, I used it often to escape my troubles," Ivan said as he pulled aside ivy and let Alfred into the gardens.

The gardens were neatly trimmed and arranged by color, and a fountain in the middle of it. It was quite impressive.

"Come, we'll sit in the gazebo," Ivan said pointing to a blue stretcher almost hidden by trees.

When they arrived Ivan seated Alfred on the bench inside and Ivan sat beside him. They panted softly from their quick escape but relaxed as the warmth of the afternoon breeze came to them.

"Ivan… what is this all about?" Alfred asked after catching his breath, his curiosity getting to him.

Ivan sighed deeply and slouched against the bench. "As you already know, my father and I are not on good terms. The terrible things he has made me do… what he's done to me, and to others… I just can't stand him, but I can't stand _up_ to him. When he touched you I got so irritated and worried that he would do something to you."

"Is that why you have been so upset?" Alfred asked.

Ivan furrowed his brow in confusion then shook his head.

"No, this morning I was upset with Natalia. She was the one coming down the hall last night, and it was only to find me and scold me for ignoring her. She said I should have gone with her to talk about some matters rather than follow you—but it's nothing. She is always so demanding of my time."

Alfred hummed at hearing this then leaned back against the bench as well. "Perhaps she just missed her brother," he said thoughtfully.

Ivan scoffed and folded his arms across his chest. "If she could, she would lock me in my room so I could never leave her."

Alfred smiled at that. A little sibling discourse was always charming. He hated it when Matthew would get on him over things, but it was during those moments that he appreciated his twin as well.

"It will be alright." Alfred assured and patted Ivan's knee. "Especially now, since you are here to stay."

"Perhaps, but as long as my father is alive I won't really be at ease while I am here." Ivan said coldly.

Alfred looked at Ivan worriedly, then sat up in his seat.

"Why is your father so… so…"

"Cruel?" Ivan filled in and Alfred just nodded sheepishly. "He was never much of a father when I was younger, when my mother was alive…. I suppose when she died from sickness after giving birth to Natalia that was when he changed, but who is to say? He has always been this way, but the death of mother brought it out of him more. And now that he is dying he still won't change. He will be heartless until his last breath." Ivan said through clenched teeth. "I wait for the day that happens. I know it's close because he is much weaker than he was the day I left to meet you."

Alfred didn't know how to respond to this. He was just surprised by the look of hatred on Ivan's face and the tension in his voice. Alfred wasn't happy with King Mikhail either, but he couldn't understand how much Ivan suffered under that man, how much he longed for the death of his father. Even thinking of Arthur in the same manner was impossible, he had always been a strict but caring father—the complete opposite of Ivan's.

"Sorry," Ivan said suddenly, bring Alfred from his troubled thoughts. "I should not be acting this way in front of you. It is unsightly."

Alfred stared at Ivan for a second, watching his anger melt into shame and exasperation. Alfred reached a hand out to touch his cheek, turning Ivan's head towards him.

"Ivan, there is nothing to be ashamed of. I might not fully understand everything you have been through, but I am here for you, okay?"

Ivan looked at Alfred with hopeful and longing eyes that pulled at Alfred's heart. Alfred couldn't help but lean into his troubled love and place a chaste kiss on his lips. Ivan felt the tension slip from him as Alfred kissed him gently. Ivan let out a shaky breath when Alfred pulled back and found his vision slightly blurry as he looked at him. He tried to fight back the tears he knew was in his eyes, so he wouldn't look pitiful before Alfred, but it was a losing battle.

"It's alright," Alfred said softly as he reached his hand up to swipe a stray tear. "As long as I am here, I will do my best to ease your pain."

Ivan took another shaky breath and took hold of Alfred's hand. "And I will do the same for you. I want to be there for you as well. I don't want to burden you."

"How could you ever burden me, my dear king?" Alfred said with a smile and light hearted tone.

Ivan felt his heart skip a beat at the endearment, finding his mood completely changed. It was as if Alfred had used a spell to ease his pain.

"I love you, my dear queen," Ivan replied.

Alfred felt a crooked smile break across his face as he heard this. He still wasn't sure how to respond, but he knew this time around he felt more comfortable with Ivan telling him he loved him. He didn't feel anxiety strangling him as it had before, instead he felt an urge to touch Ivan, an urge to kiss him until they were both breathless.

"I want to kiss you," Ivan said suddenly, bringing Alfred from his emotional stupor.

"As do I," Alfred said softly, his face burning red, which coincidently matched Ivan's.

Ivan leaned forward quickly, and Alfred meet him halfway, both meeting for a gentle yet hungry kiss. Alfred squeezed Ivan's hand that still held onto his as they kissed in secret. He pressed himself closer to Ivan, trying to close any gaps between them as they kissed. Ivan couldn't help but do the same, wanting to hold Alfred close. He wrapped an arm around Alfred and pulled him onto his lap with little effort, and slipped his tongue into Alfred's mouth once he was seated. Alfred felt his heart beating frantically when he was placed in Ivan's lap, but he kept his composure when he felt Ivan's tongue invade his mouth. He wasn't going to let Ivan have all the fun and used his own tongue to tease Ivan. He slide it alongside Ivan's, making them both pant quickly, but the moment he grazed the roof of Ivan's mouth he groaned. Alfred smiled into the kiss and kept up his actions, flicking his tongue and making Ivan moan for him. Hearing the alpha make such a sound made Alfred's body heat up in a way that almost frightened him. He couldn't take much more and had to pull away, a need for air and something to cool down his body was nagging at him too much.

When he backed away their panting became rougher as they tried to catch their breath and calm down. Ivan rested back on the bench and Alfred placed his head on Ivan's shoulder, neither of them felt a need to truly separate just yet. They stayed as they were, Alfred in Ivan's lap, as they calmed down, but as they sat there Alfred realized that the heat that had frightened him seemed to linger even when his breathing evened out. It wasn't as intense before, but more of a slight discomfort. He played it off though, hoping it was just the heat of afternoon getting to him.

"Alfred?"

Alfred looked up as he heard his name, finding himself face to face with Ivan—reminding him that he was still sitting on the man. Ivan stared back with curiosity then brushed aside some of Alfred's hair.

"I'm alright, just… overwhelmed," Alfred said finally then moved from Ivan's lap with the grace of a nervous dog.

Ivan found it cute and had an urge to make a comment about it, but he didn't the chance. A far off voice interrupted the moment, calling out for them both by name. They sat silently as they listened to the calling voices, realizing that the servants where looking for them.

"It must be time for the rehearsal…" Alfred said as he looked around the gardens. "I suppose we should get going then."

Ivan nodded in agreement and watched Alfred get up, but before he got too far Ivan grabbed his hand. Alfred turned back around in time to see Ivan pull on him, bringing him back to his lap and found himself smothered with a kiss. The kiss was long but chaste, which made Alfred sigh with content.

"Now we can go," Ivan said once he pulled away, ending their kiss. Alfred had a snort of a laugh escape him before he could even stop it, and Ivan found it another reason why he liked the prince so much.

୨.❀.୧

"Have you practiced?"

Ivan turned from the vanity he sat at to look at his older sister.

"Practiced what?" he asked.

"Your vows, Vanya! Oh, please tell me you have been studying them while in Sunre," Katyusha said worriedly.

"I don't think big brother needs vows," Natalia cut in. "I don't think he even needs to get married."

"Natalia, not now," Katyusha sighed with a shake of her head.

Natalia huffed and laid back on the couch in the small room. "I could rule by his side, two alphas of respect," she grumbled but went ignored by her elder siblings.

"Katyusha, I have practiced, many times with the Queen herself or in my spare time," Ivan said tiredly. "And I _do_ need to wed," he finished, his last comment directed to his younger sister. "Alfred is... dependable, extraordinary, and I enjoy being with him," he huffed, a shade of pink dusting his face. "And I'm sure we can have a family together."

The sisters stared at their brother, both caught off guard by his choice of words. Ivan had never been the type to think of someone so fondly. They hadn't seen that side of their brother for quite some time.

"Now please, dear sisters, leave me be." Ivan said, his embarrassment and the silence of his sisters had gotten to him.

Natalia stared at her brother a while longer, then gave a huff before leaving the room with a frown. Katyusha just sighed and went to follow her, but stopped at the door.

"As a word of advice- There is a time and a place for everything. Don't rush, but don't hold back for too long either," she said. "I look forward to seeing your happiness." With that, Katyusha departed, leaving Ivan feeling anxious.

He sighed deeply then glanced into the ornate mirror that sat on the vanity. He looked at himself to see his face tinged pink and could feel his heart beating loudly. He pressed his hands to his face and rubbed feverishly before taking a deep breath and staring at his reflection once more. A determined stare looked back at him and he reached up to fix a few stray hairs before leaving the room.

The room he had been in was a not so secret space behind the thrones themselves, which allowed for royals to prepare themselves. Ivan went through a side door that exited outside the throne room and walked around to the main doors. There he saw Alfred waiting for him and looking nervous, the scent of honey and sour sweetness wafted off the blonde, urging Ivan to keep up his determination.

"Are you ready, Alfred?" Ivan asked as he stood beside the other prince, getting his attention.

"Y-Yes, completely, utterly, for all intents and purposes—"

Alfred's words were cut short as Ivan placed a kiss on his forehead.

"It is just a rehearsal moye solnyshko. Relax. It is okay to mess up."

Alfred was silent for a moment then took a deep breath, which made Ivan smile.

"You are right. I shouldn't lose my head."

Ivan nodded then placed a hand on Alfred's cheek, pulling his face upwards. Alfred felt his nervous heart ease, yet beat frantically as those violet eyes looked at him. Alfred couldn't help but want kiss the lips that smiled him, but before he could make a move a servant seemed to materialize from thin air.

"They are ready for you, your highnesses."

Alfred swallowed thickly as Ivan let him go and took his hand back.

"It will be easy, just watch," Ivan whispered as the servant moved to open the doors for them.

"I hope you are right," Alfred replied softly as the doors were pulled apart.

They took a deep breath together before taking their first step.

* * *

**Translations:**

moye solnyshko – my sunshine

 ******* Welp, that took longer than expected lol Hope yall liked it and there's still more to come! Work is still a shit show but im trying to find time and motivation to keep writing when i'm able! The good shit is just about to start in this fic and I aint quitting!


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 8**

୨.❀.୧

The night was young, but Alfred had chosen to retire to his room as soon as dinner was over. He needed time to himself and away from any prying eyes. He felt like he would loose his mind if he spent another second listening to his family and Ivan's talk about the wedding.

"Oh Gods!" he cried into his pillow his frantic heartbeat ringing in his ears. He yelled out his distress into his pillow hoping to feel better. The rehearsal had been just that, a rehearsal, but it had seemed very real, and so had been the pressure. All eyes had been on them the second they stepped into the room, even if it was just their families, a few servants, and the priest. It seemed like a miracle that they managed to get to the altar without Alfred tripping over his own feet. But when it began, Alfred had forgotten his line instantly and the priest had to lead him through it. Ivan had misworded his vows as well and when the coronation part of the rehearsal began it was just as much of a mess as before. It all had been embarrassing, and the anxiety wouldn't ease until the fifth run-through.

In short, the day had really worn him out. He never thought he would be where he was now, a part of him still held onto the childish idea that everything would be called off and he'd get to go back home. Or he never had to be selected at all, but now that he was here, he was in a panic. The rehearsal had been terrible at first and taken so long to finally get through it correctly, which didn't give Alfred much hope about tomorrow. At the stroke of 12 he would become a husband, a queen, and experience his first true heat.

 _'Oh Gods! I forgot that I_ will _have to lie with him!'_ Alfred thought in shock then tightened his grip on his pillow. He laid there in worry as he tried to feel the usual signs that his heat was coming, but he couldn't tell. He didn't feel hot and his back and stomach didn't hurt either.

_'What if I don't get it in time?'_

This stray thought had some relief to it, but not much. Alfred knew no matter how long it took, he would end up in bed with Ivan—he would have to make love. Alfred's panic lessened as the word "love" grabbed his attention. He still didn't understand love nor know if he had it for Ivan. He knew Ivan had it for him, but… could he really say it back? To admit feelings that are meant to be treasured to someone you are forced to marry and make children with… But, if that someone happens to be nice and charming, a complete opposite of what you thought of them before… And the kisses… Alfred felt his face heat up as he thought about this then pulled away from his pillow to cool down. He rolled over onto his back and stared up at the canopy.

"I'm not ready… am I?"

As his question went unanswered, Alfred sighed and looked to his window. The moon was high in the sky and the stars twinkled like fireflies. The scenery brought him ease, but a knock at his door took that away.

"Alfred, are you there?"

Alfred stayed where he was as he heard Ivan's voice through the door.

"Alfred?"

Alfred debated on answering the door—part of him wanted to see Ivan, but a larger part of him didn't. He stayed on the bed and soon heard Ivan sigh and say something inaudible before he left. For some reason it made Alfred feel guilty, but he didn't bring himself to stop Ivan.

"Sorry, Ivan," he muttered then rolled over onto his stomach.

He could feel his head starting to hurt as his frantic thoughts started to come back. He tried to ignore them, just ready to let sleep take him, but he knew he couldn't. Tomorrow those thoughts would be bigger and he would be lost in frustration and worry.

"What will I do?" he asked himself.

He waited for an idea, some ray of hope, but nothing came to him. He laid on his bed feeling defeated until he heard the sound of footsteps. His first thought was that Ivan had come back, and he found himself moving for the door before he could even think about doing so. Something in him wanted to see the man after all, perhaps hoping that he could ease his worries, but when he opened his door all he found was Matthew. His twin was halfway into his own room when Alfred appeared and Matthew looked at him with confusion and worry.

"What is wrong Alfred?" Matthew asked as he looked at his brother. "Did something happen?"

Alfred stared at Matthew for a while, but then shook his head.

"No, I… Can I spend the night with you?"

Matthew eyed Alfred curiously, but nodded his head and let Alfred into his room. Matthew's room was similar to Alfred's but had a comforting shade of blue as the main color. They sat down on the bed together and Alfred sat up against the pillows. Matthew watched him for a while but he couldn't wait all night for his brother to speak.

"Alfred, what is troubling you?" he asked. "You are never this quite."

Alfred sighed as he looked at his hands then looked over to Matthew.

"About tomorrow… I don't believe I can do it."

Matthew stared at Alfred in shock then moved to get closer to his brother.

"You made a few mistakes in rehearsal, but you did well later," he said. "You will be fine tomorrow."

Alfred sighed and shook his head.

"No, it's not just that. I… I just don't know what I am supposed to do! I don't know what to feel!" he admitted loudly, his stress getting the better of him.

Matthew placed both his hands on his brother's shoulders and stared him down.

"Calm down Alfred, everything will be fine."

Alfred frowned at Matthew with red tinged eyes.

"How would you know?! I don't see you freaking out about having sex for the first time or wondering if you really love the person you _have_ to marry! Ivan has already been with someone before! I don't know what I'm doing! I might not be enough, no matter what he says!"

"You love him." Matthew said suddenly, making Alfred look at him like he had grown another head. "For you to be this torn over being ready or enough for him… you are worried about him. You love him enough to worry about these things and that's okay."

"Really?"

"Yes, you idiot. You just need to calm down and see what you have in front of you. Ivan, who I don't trust all that much, is so far a decent human being and the way you guys were during rehearsal made me happy for you. You looked nervous but he constantly assured you in some way," Matthew pointed out which made Alfred blush. "And even before that, if you wasn't around me or him, Ivan would always ask me if you were okay and where he could find you. He cares a lot about you and I know you care for him too."

"I… I suppose I love him, but I just… I don't feel any different."

"Sometimes you do and sometimes you don't, but once you think about it you just know."

Alfred let Matthew's words sink in and the weight of his anxiety seemed to melt away. He felt better but still very nervous.

"Okay… but I'm still nervous." Alfred said with a sigh.

"I bet you are," Matthew agreed then with a smirk as he said, "You do have to make lo-"

"Matthew shut up!"

"Why? You are the one worried about hav—" Matthew was cut off as a pillow was shoved into his face and the weight of his twin started to crush him.

"Just forget I said it okay! I don't even know if I will have my heat in time!" Alfred shouted as he smothered his brother.

Matthew moved his hands to shove the pillow down so he could breath and looked up to see Alfred's blushing face above him.

"It will be fine Alfred. I never had sex myself, but I'm sure Ivan will understand. If he doesn't, then he doesn't deserve to have you."

Alfred didn't say anything in response and just collapsed on top of Matthew.

"I hate this."

"It will be okay. Now I don't know about you, but I'm ready to sleep. It is going to be a busy day tomorrow."

Alfred sighed and moved off his brother and plopped down on the bed. He curled up on his side while Matthew sat up and went to change into his night clothes.

"You will be fine. Just focus on getting through the ceremony and then you are free."

Alfred curled up more and Matthew just rolled his eyes and got into bed.

୨.❀.୧

The smell of a sweet spice roused Matthew from a dream he wished he didn't have to leave. Catalina had been so beautiful and bare that it made him drool, but the scent was getting distracting. It smelt familiar somehow but it also made something in him feel like it was on fire. He cracked open a tired eye and looked to his side to find his twin curled around him. He could see that Alfred was dreaming of something troubling and could feel its effects on him. Matthew breathed deeply at seeing how his morning was going to go, but when he breathed in he choked on the scent. It was then that he realized what the scent was and practically scrambled out of bed—prying free of Alfred and falling off the bed in the process.

His not-so-graceful movements caused Alfred to wake from discomfort. Alfred had been laying on Matthew to help ease the pain he felt in his stomach, but now that Matthew was gone there was nothing to press against the spot nor the comforting scent of an alpha. He groaned and rolled over trying to find a comfortable position to lay in, but nothing was working.

"Hell… It hurts," he moaned out and pressed his face into Matthew's pillow. The scent wasn't as strong but it helped somewhat.

"Alfred!" Matthew shouted then got back onto the bed, but not too close. "Wake up! Alfred!"

Alfred groaned and looked at the blurry shape of his twin.

"Matthew, I think I'm in heat."

"How did you guess?" Matthew said with a roll of his eyes. "I will get mother, don't move!"

Alfred just groaned in response and waited for what felt like centuries for Matthew to retune with their mother and a servant. Alfred clutched his abdomen tightly hoping the pain would stop. The cramps were what he hated the most, they didn't last long but they were powerful.

"Medicine, please," he begged as his mother came to him.

"I can't my darling, you have to stay natural for the conception." Francine said as she placed a rag on Alfred's face, cooling him down.

"Then give me Matthew," he groaned.

"I can't do that either, your brother has things to do in my place, but I will keep you here, if you don't mind," Francine said as she looked to her eldest.

"You know I don't." Matthew said as he watched his twin wriggle in pain and push his face into his pillow more.

He remembered the days when he would be stuck with Alfred just so his scent could sooth him, but as he got older he couldn't stay with him for too long. By that time though Alfred was able to receive medicine and handle it.

"I must go," Matthew said suddenly, making his mother look at him worriedly. "I'm fine, but not for long."

Francine nodded in understanding, "Go, tell you father what has happened and then help him prepare for the ceremony."

Matthew nodded then quickly left the room before the scent of the heat could do any damage. Francine kept her attention on her other son, trying to ease his pain as best she could.

"Has it always hurt this much?" Alfred asked as he shoved pillows under his left side to press against the pain.

"For male omegas, but it will pass. Just bear with it my child."

Alfred groaned and cursed the gods for making him an omega. He hated the heat, even more so now since he couldn't use medicine to ease his pain and curb the urges that came after. It also didn't help that his mother had to witness this and clean him up every so often. He was a heavy flow when it came to producing slick, something his mother complimented on and compared to herself. Which is something no child should ever hear. If the cramps didn't kill him the embarrassment would.

As the hours ticked by Alfred was constantly being cared for. His mother would clean him while the servants brought supplies and food. At one point Ivan had even came to the room, but he wasn't allowed to enter. Alfred could hear his voice, but that was all. He couldn't look at Ivan when he was like this, he felt so vulnerable.

"Here, I have something to help ease the pain," Francine said.

Alfred couldn't tell what it was, but he could smell it.

"Ivan?!"

"Just his jacket," Francine informed and placed it beside Alfred. He latched onto it and immediately felt better, but still in pain. "I remember my father doing this for me on my wedding day. You will soon sleep away the rest of the pain."

Alfred barely heard a word his mother said. His focus was all on the jacket, the earthy musk was strong and hinted of spice, and the jacket was still warm from being worn. Alfred wished he could just bath in Ivan's scent as he laid there. It clouded his mind and he could feel his cock starting to stiffen and his cramps starting to fade. He felt exhausted from the pain and before he knew it he was passed out.

When Alfred came to he found himself feeling strange. He was lightheaded, his abdomen felt hollow and fluttery, he felt like hadn't ate in ages, and his lower half felt gross. He knew he was hard and he knew he was covered in slick, but there was nothing he could do about it. He took a deep breath and slowly uncurled his body only to freeze by a sudden voice.

"Oh, you are finally up. I bet you are hungry."

Alfred realized it was his mother's voice and nodded his head slowly. He sat up and moaned softly from how stiff he felt and laid out on the bed. His mother pulled the chain in Matthew's room to call a servant in the kitchen for food.

"How long have I slept?"

"Just a few hours, but we pushed back the ceremony to this evening to be safe."

Alfred sighed then looked at the bed to see a waist jacket in his hand. He picked it up and smelt it without thinking. He could pick up a hint of Ivan but nothing more. He folded it neatly then rested back against the headboard.

"How long till the ceremony?"

"Two hours." Francine informed. "Alfre—"

Right then a knock came to the door and Francine stood to get it. Two servants held trays of food and water and quickly came into the room. Francine thanked them then told them to find her personal servants to assist in getting Alfred ready. They quickly hurried to do as told and Alfred drank his water slowly. He didn't want to speak or even think about what was going to happen in the coming hours. He took what peace he could get and ate as much as he could before the servants returned.

"Come on, let's get you cleaned up," Francine said after Alfred finished his food and the servants finished drawing his bath.

Alfred groaned but obeyed and got off the bed with help. He was escorted to the bath that was similar to his back in his room and quickly found relief in the hot water. He scrubbed himself clean then was dried and wrapped in a towel before being seated at a vanity. There he spent, what felt like years, in front of the mirror as he was poked and prodded by servants applying makeup, cleaning his nails, and styling his hair.

Alfred was then sent to his room to get dressed and he found himself being tossed into elegant and loose clothing. His pants were black and slightly billowy, no doubt to avoid getting stained by slick or at least appear that way. His shirt was a tunic of white that had baby blue accents and a sash to match. He then slipped on ankle high boots and was seated in front of a full body mirror for last minute adjustments. When it was all said and done Alfred found himself to look absolutely stunning and completely different. He stared at himself without blinking and as he processed that the person before him was himself he felt tears run down his face.

_'This is me… I'm getting married…'_

"O-Oh Gods," Alfred hiccupped and felt his tears coming out more freely. "What am I doing?"

The servants looked at Alfred in surprise and quickly tried to think of something to say, but Francine easily stepped in. She dismissed the servants as she sat beside Alfred on the bench seat.

"You are getting married to a wonderful man," she said as she took Alfred into a hug. "A man who loves you, my child."

"But I don't even know if I love him! I think I do, but I just don't know! I-I-I—"

"Shhh, it's alright. Everything will sort itself out and you will know your feelings," she said calmly then rested her head on top of Alfred's. "Believe it or not, but I know how you feel."

"You do?" Alfred asked as he held onto his mother.

"Yes, your father and I loathed each other in the beginning. We had known each other for a few years before we were meant to be wed. We always fought and teased each other, but when we found out about the wedding, we came to realize our fates. It was hard for us to adjust and by the time we had the ceremony and I was in heat, we hated each other, but… The second we got to our marital bed something had changed in us both. Arthur had been so loving towards me and he actually said "I love you" first."

Alfred looked up at his mother when he heard this and saw the thoughtful expression that only a loving memory could cause. Something about that expression put his heart and his nerves at ease. Francine smiled at him and moved a hand to wipe at his tear stained face.

"Alfred, you may be confused and lost, but you will find your way faster than you think," she assured. "Just give the love that you can right now. I know you enjoy Ivan's companionship as it is."

Alfred stared at his mother for a second more before tears began to blur his vision once more. He felt overwhelmed and relieved all at once and leaned back into his mother as he cried. Francine smiled softly as she held her son and patted his back gently.

"I-I-I'm scared… but happy." Alfred said after some time.

"It is natural to feel that way. I bet Ivan feels the same."

Alfred took a deep ragged breath as he heard this, then pulled away from the tight embrace. He straightened up to sit beside his mother properly and looked at himself and Francine in the mirror.

"Just stay relaxed and everything will be done before you know it." Francine advised as she held out a tissue for Alfred. He wiped at his eyes and nose, but then found his face turning to his mother. She held his chin in a gentle hold then she leaned forward to give him a kiss on his forehead. Alfred felt immensely calm after it and watched Francine pick up one of the brushes used for his makeup and dipped it into a dark pink powder. He stayed still as she brought it to his face, starting the process of reapplying his makeup. "You have grown so much Alfred." she said suddenly. "I will miss having to scold you for fighting with your brother and terrorizing the servants."

Alfred laughed softly at that and his mother did too.

"I love you Alfred and you will always be my child. I know you will do great here with Ivan at your side." Alfred felt like he could believe his mother, that he would be okay, that he would find that elusive feeling of love. "Now that your tears are dry, how about we get you married?"

Alfred took a deep breath as he calmed down then nodded his head. He felt better about what he was going to be faced with and hopeful that everything would be alright.

୨.❀.୧

The doors to the throne room seemed to be even more intimidating than they had at rehearsal when Alfred got there. His mother dropped him off there and slipped into the throne room to sit with their family. He could hear the hundreds of voices on the other side and Alfred felt his gut twist.

_'Just breathe it'll be fine. Just breathe it'll be fine. Just bre—'_

"Alfred."

Alfred stiffened as he heard his name, he knew who was calling him from smell alone. The earthy musk scent laced with a spice grabbed Alfred's attention faster than he could process it. He whipped around to see Ivan coming up to him and he froze where he was. Ivan was dressed in clothing similar to Alfred's but a little tighter fitting. His black slacks hugged his lower half but the tunic he wore covered up anything of interest, even though it was more fitting on Ivan. He had a blue sash on as well and looked extremely alluring. Alfred felt his heart beating frantically as he looked at Ivan and it only got worse once Ivan was next to him. His scent made Alfred shiver and his cock twitch in his pants. He blushed from the sensation and tried desperately to keep calm.

"Y-You look nice," Alfred stammered out then bit the inside of his cheek.

"Thank you, but you look absolutely stunning," Ivan said with a husky voice. He knew Alfred's scent would affect him, but he didn't think it would be so quick. He could already feel the heat of his rut increasing in his gut and his pants getting tight. He felt this way ever since he found out about Alfred's heat starting and when he had visited him, even though it was brief, he had felt intoxicated by the scent. Heavy seeds were typically more generous in the scents and secretions they produced, which made even little exposure to them in heat a struggle for any alpha or beta. Ivan found himself swallowing thickly as he surveyed Alfred and tried valiantly to beat down the urge to take Alfred right then and there.

"S-So, today's the day," Alfred said as he tied to break the silence around them. The look Ivan was giving him was making him more nervous than before and he needed a distraction.

"Oh, yes, it is." Ivan said snapping out of his thoughts. "I know we can make it through this. We did so in rehearsal."

Alfred let out a snort and nodded his head. "Yeah, after the 6th time of doing it."

Ivan smiled sheepishly as he agreed with Alfred, then at that moment a servant came up to them.

"Your Highnesses, it's time." Ivan and Alfred looked at each other owlishly then to the servant. "Please, take your positions."

The two nodded slowly then stood before the door. Their hearts felt ready to burst from nervous energy and the heat that was consuming them both.

"Just breathe," Alfred whispered to himself, but Ivan heard as well.

"Just breathe," Ivan repeated making Alfred look at him. He smiled softly and Alfred felt his stress easing for just a moment.

"Open the doors," a servant ordered and two other servants grabbed the rings on the door and pulled.

_'Just breathe.'_

୨.❀.୧

The throne room that was once empty was packed with people from every kingdom. It was a sea of color that stood before Alfred and Ivan, all eyes on them. They focused their stare on the priest standing tall on the makeshift altar on the throne and took their first step. Harps played in the background as they made their way down the aisle in perfect sync. After every few steps they would get closer to each other, then take hold of each other's hands, and finally locked arms and present themselves to the priest.

The music fell silent and the priest gave them a hard stare.

"Today we are gathered here to unit two lovers, two kingdoms, in the light of our Lords."

Alfred stared at the priest as he spoke taking note of anything that would ease the pressure he felt off him. He could feel all the eyes watching him and the discomfort of the slick running down his legs. He eyed the ornate robes the priest wore and the beard he sported. He then looked down at the table between them. A pillow with their rings and a needle were set before them then on each side was a short staff and ball with a cross sticking up on it. Alfred observed what he had only practiced just the day before, but he was brought from his thoughts as Ivan turned to him. Alfred cursed himself for zoning out and brought all his focus on Ivan as he raised his right hand.

"I vow to never stray, to never fall from your light," Ivan started, his accented voice keeping Alfred's attention. "I will accompany you through sickness, health, and every adventure. You are my sun, my star." He said fondly, making Alfred blush. Ivan then reached for one of the rings on the pillow and Alfred brought his hand forward a bit too quickly. Ivan just smiled at him and took it gently as he held the ring in front of his finger. "With this ring I hold you close to my heart and my mind." Ivan slid the ring on then Alfred took his hand back then lifted his right to begin his vow.

"I, vow to never stray, to never fall from your love," Alfred said nervously. "I will accompany you through sickness, health, and every adventure. You are my world, my life." He said with relief in his voice. He then took the other ring from the pillow and took the hand Ivan held out for him. "With this ring I hold you close to my heart and my mind."

"With your hearts open let us finalize this holy marriage." The priest announced then took up the needle that rested on the pillow. Ivan and Alfred turned to the priest and held out their left hands, which the priest quickly pricked their ring fingers, causing a bead of red blood to appear in its wake. He then took their hands and pushed them together, mixing their blood. "I now pronounce you husband and husband. May the years be kind and full of joy. You may kiss groom."

The two faced each other once more and exchanged a simple kiss. Nothing too deep, just short and sweet, for they felt if it was anything more the whole world would end up seeing something they shouldn't.

When they pulled apart the priest smiled and handed them a tissue to dry the blood while he set up for the next portion of the ceremony.

"Now we shall begin the coronation of Prince Ivan and Alfred Braginsky," The priest boomed then handed off the materials of the wedding to an alter child then flipped to a page marked in his bible. "Being the ruler of Owleta is not for the weak. You both have been chosen due to the strength you both have and the nobility you hold. Ivan, state your oath for the kingdom, for the Gods, to hear."

Ivan stood stiffly as he placed his hand on the bible page the priest held out to him. A look of determination was on his face and Alfred felt he was standing next to a whole other person.

"As the king I swear to keep the kingdom strong, reliable, and prosperous, in the light of the Gods."

"Good, good." The priest said then moved the bible to Alfred. "Now you."

Alfred nodded his head then placed his hand on the bible as Ivan had done.

"As the queen I swear to keep the kingdom in order alongside my king, to help it thrive, and uphold the faith in our kingdom, in the light of the Gods."

"Good, now we shall proceed to the crowning." The priest said and gestured for Ivan and Alfred to take hold of the short staff and ball before them. "With the items of fair judgment and strength passed down from generation to generation, I dub ye both King and Queen of Owleta."

At that moment the crowns were placed upon both of their heads and Alfred itched to get out of the room. The ceremony was over, they were free, and he desperately needed to get his pants off. The slick was definitely soaking through his clothes, he knew it was. He needed to get to his room, any room that didn't have people in it. Alas, he was stuck, standing beside his now husband and king as royals congratulated them. Ivan was not blind to Alfred's discomfort however, he could smell the change in the scent Alfred was giving off and knew they couldn't wait any longer. His cock felt like it would rip though his pants if he had to wait one more second.

"Thank you all for coming, truly it means a lot," Ivan said as he set down the holy items then took Alfred's as well. "It has been a pleasure and now we must go, but drink, eat, and be merry." He said quickly as he took Alfred's hand and pulled him close. He quickly hoisted Alfred into his arms and carried him bridal style out of the throne room as fast as possible. The royals cheered and laughed at the sight and Alfred gawked at Ivan for his actions, but held onto him as he ran through the halls towards their marital bed.

The second they arrived at the bedroom a servant was there with the door open and waiting. Ivan rushed inside and the servant closed and locked the door from the outside. Ivan set Alfred on the bed and quickly took off his crown followed by his own and put them on a desk, far from the bed. He then stood before Alfred and both of them just stared at each other panting softly.

"I want you Alfred. I want you so badly." Ivan huffed. "I can't hold back anymore, your scent is intoxicating."

Alfred felt his heart melting as he heard this, and before he could think he said, "Don't hold back."

Alfred didn't know how freeing those words could be until Ivan was all over him. Ivan gave up his last bit of restraint and pushed Alfred down and quickly tore off his clothes. Alfred was surprised but not afraid, all he wanted was Ivan in him as fast as possible. His body was screaming for Ivan and he couldn't deny himself any longer. He never knew how numbing a full heat could be, the scents clouded his mind and all he could think about was being filled over and over and over.

"I need you," Alfred gasped as Ivan bit into his shoulder, marking him as his.

Ivan growled as his teeth sank into the shoulder, then pulled back to lick and kiss the mark. He moved his lips further up to kiss Alfred properly, smothering moans and gasps with his dominating tongue. Neither of them could get enough of each other, but they still had all week to get their fill. A highseed could be in heat from a week to two and keep the alpha and/or beta in their rut all the while due to their scent.

"I want to be in you," Ivan moaned as he stopped his kisses and looked at Alfred's blush stained face.

"Do it." Alfred consented. "Make love to me."

Ivan nodded his head and sat back on his heels. Alfred eagerly spread his legs, showing Ivan everything he had to offer. His short cock was hard and throbbing, and slick was pouring out of his hole, covering his thighs and the bedding. Ivan licked his lips and reached down to gather some of the slick and placed it on his cock. He was so hard that his knot was already out and Alfred gawked at it. Ivan was so much bigger than he imagined and he hoped he was able to take it all. He wanted it, wanted it so badly.

"Hurry, please!" Alfred begged as he watched Ivan stroke himself.

Ivan grunted and let go of his cock and got into position. He didn't have time to think about stretching Alfred open, he needed to be inside of him at that very moment. He pushed his hips forward, the head of his cock slipped in easily, but as his girth increased the deeper he went, and things began to slow down. Alfred had tears prick his eyes as he was stretched and Ivan groaned at how tightly his cock was squeezed.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry," Ivan muttered over and over as he pushed more. He couldn't stop his movements, he needed to go deeper.

Alfred let out a ragged sob as the pain shot up his back, and once the knot pressed against his hole he tightened his grip painfully on Ivan. Ivan didn't even try to push anymore, he knew Alfred was hurting and he gave off a soothing scent to help calm Alfred and cloud his mind to the pain.

"Mne zhal', moya lyubov'," Ivan muttered in his native tongue.

Alfred barely understood it as he felt his pain subsiding and his tears stopping.

"It is, o-okay, just don't move just yet," Alfred said in a gruff voice. "Gods, why are you so big?" he whined.

Ivan felt guilt fight through the haze of the heat and he buried his face into Alfred's neck and ran his fingers through his hair. He started to kiss Alfred all over, moving from his neck to his face, tasting his tears and shushing his whimpers.

"Ty udivitel'naya moya lyubov'. YA khochu, chtoby ty tak mnogo."

Alfred sniffled and grabbed ahold of Ivan's face to make him look at him fully. He wanted to tell Ivan that he loved him, something he had doubted for so long, but he couldn't. The shock of just knowing he wanted to silenced his words, so instead, he acted. He pulled Ivan down for a kiss. A hard, loving kiss that had Ivan moaning above him. When they pulled apart Alfred wiped away a string of saliva that was bridged between them and smiled at him.

"You can move."

Ivan kissed Alfred chastely then pushed up so he could thrust. The first thrust was nothing like anything Alfred had expected. His slick made the movement smooth and addictive, and he wanted more even if it still hurt. Ivan thrust quickly, going as fast as his body would allow but still trying to not hurt Alfred any more than he had.

"I'm going to-" Alfred shouted suddenly, but cut himself off to moan loudly, making Ivan look down.

Alfred's cock looked ready to burst any second and Ivan couldn't help but reach down to help it along. He barely wrapped his hand around it before Alfred climaxed. His voice came out as a scream of Ivan's name as he came for the first time that night. Stars danced in his vision and his legs trembled from the orgasm that ravaged his body. He never felt so good in his life and it only got better when he felt Ivan's hot semen pour into him.

"S-Sorry, just looking at you… I—" Ivan was cut off by a groan and hunched over Alfred as he came hard.

"Is okay, do it again," Alfred slurred. "Oh Gawds, do it again!"

Ivan didn't need any further instruction. He started thrusting again picking up his rhythm faster and faster. Alfred found himself moaning even louder than before, the pain from earlier was still present but not as strong. He found his heat easily taking him over once more and he lost himself in the pleasure. His back arched as he cried out for Ivan and his fingers dug into the alpha's back, making Ivan hiss from the slight sting.

Ivan bucked hard into Alfred, making him scream in pleasure and pain. He growled Alfred's name when he heard the scream and found the heat of his own rut clouding his mind even more. He couldn't get enough of Alfred, he was high off his scent, his voice, his body. Ivan wanted him closer, needed to be deeper in him, craved to taste him. He felt something in him snap, and he found himself pulling out of Alfred. All he could process was a need and as he rolled a whining Alfred onto his stomach and pulled his ass into the air, he could tell Alfred felt the same. Alfred needed Ivan badly, having him pull out so suddenly made him whine in complaint and tears come to his eyes. He felt hollow and desperate for Ivan and craned his neck to look back at the alpha with pleading eyes. Ivan grabbed Alfred's hips and thrust his swollen cock back inside. He snapped his hips forward, hard enough to push his knot into the blond. Alfred let out the most obscene mewl as his body shivered from the knot fitting into his hole. Ivan growled and started thrusting, shaking the bed and filling the room with the sound of skin hitting skin. Alfred's moans and cries rang out above all the noise and Ivan found himself cumming once more just from the sound of it. Alfred felt as if he was drowning, all the air leaving his lungs as he felt Ivan cum into him. He felt like he would burst and came from the sensation.

Ivan moaned from the feeling of Alfred cumming, his hole twitching and sucking him in, keeping him deep into the blond as he emptied his cock. He moved a hand to Alfred's neck and leaned down to start kissing the small of Alfred's back then work up. Alfred gasped and twitch from the attention, but it was only temporary—Ivan was only waiting for his knot to loosen. His knot kept him firmly rooted in Alfred, but once the swelling started to lessen he began to thrust again. He fucked his seed into Alfred and pressed on Alfred's neck to keep him where he laid. Alfred gave a hoarse cry as they started up once more.

The concept of time and the sensation of hunger was lost on them as they made love for the rest of the night and the following days. Their only focus was each other and the need to stay as close as possible.

* * *

**Translation:**

"Mne zhal', moya lyubov'," – im sorry my love

Ty udivitel'naya moya lyubov'.YA khochu, chtoby ty tak mnogo. - "You are amazing my love. I want you so much."

 *****Decided** to update today instead of yesterday (when the chap was actually done) bcuz today is special... ITS MY MOTHERFUCKIN BIRTHDAY! IM 22 NOW AND STILL LIVING WITH MY GMA XDDD Anyway I hope you guess enjoyed the chapter and don't worry more sexy times are coming up then followed by pain :D Thanks for sticking with me! Comments are welcomed!


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 9**

୨.❀.୧

Alfred let out a throaty moan as Ivan slammed his cock into him, pushing his knot deep inside. The sensation sent Alfred over the edge, making him cry out in bliss, but it was barely audible. His voice was too hoarse from moaning and screaming from the previous days. His body shook with pleasure and overstimulation, and he collapsed face first onto the bed. Ivan fell with him since they were joined together for the time being, and pressed himself against Alfred's back, wrapping his arms around him. He placed kisses on Alfred's neck and shoulder as he panted and trembled in his hold. Alfred couldn't help the way his body acted—the trembling, sweating, and aches—he knew his heat was wearing off. He could feel the numbing haze lifting as he laid there, he could feel the ache of having sex nonstop starting to surface, but he still had the need for more. He wanted to just be consumed by Ivan, to drown in his lust, but the intensity of that need wasn't as strong as it had been on day one.

"Are you alright, my love?" Ivan asked gruffly.

Alfred nodded meekly then Ivan kissed his cheek before pulling away. His cock remained inside, the knot not relenting just yet, but he bent over the edge of the bed backwards to retrieve a towel. He brought himself back up and stared to wipe off Alfred as best he could. Ivan could feel his rut alleviating as well, the need to take care of his love becoming more important than sex. When he finished he laid back against Alfred, holding him close but gently.

"Do you want to eat, Alfred?" Ivan asked softly.

The thought of food hadn't crossed Alfred's mind in days, but once Ivan mentioned it his stomach growled, answering for him. Ivan chuckled at hearing the noise and Alfred blushed faintly.

"I will take that as a yes," Ivan said then moved away slightly to reach for the chain on his side of the bed. He pulled on it to ring a bell down in the servants quarters then laid back against Alfred. They laid together in silence, listening to each other breath and feeling the tug off sleep. However, as they laid there Alfred found a new need eating at him. He wanted a bath. He could feel every inch of his body covered in slick, cum, sweat, and gods knew what else. It only got worse when Ivan told him to stay still and gently pulled his cock out. The knot had gone down enough so he could pull free, and the feeling of cum oozing out made Alfred shudder.

"Ivan, I wan—"

The sound of the bedroom door being knocked on silenced Alfred. He stared at it with wide eyes, completely on edge. He hadn't seen anyone other than Ivan and to suddenly remember that there was other people outside of their room disturbed him. Ivan could sense Alfred's distress easily and moved to cover Alfred with a cleaner part of their bedding before getting out of bed. Alfred watched Ivan's hazy naked form walk to the door and open it to face whoever was on the other side.

"I-I have brought you food, my King," came a shaky voice.

"Thank you," Ivan replied and Alfred watched him take a cart from the servant. "When we're finished I will ring again, and you can bring new linens then."

"Yes, my King."

With that Ivan closed the door and pushed the cart towards the bed. The scent of the food made the hunger pains stronger and Alfred sat up under the covers with drool coming from his mouth. Ivan found it cute and reached for Alfred's glasses that laid inside the bedside table drawer. He held them out to Alfred, who took them with surprise-he had figured they had been broken, or lost, or both this whole time. He slipped them on and blinked rapidly as his eyes adjusted, then looked at Ivan. A blush came to his face as he took in the clear image of his well-loved husband. Ivan's smooth creamy skin was now a mosaic of bright and dark bruises, teeth marks, and scratches. Alfred felt embarrassed knowing that he had given those marks to Ivan, he never thought he was capable of being like that with anyone. However, he also felt proud. He had made Ivan his in a way no one ever could.

"Here," Ivan said as he placed a tray of food on Alfred's lap. "Eat slowly."

Alfred stared at the food and realized just how famished he really was. He picked up his fork to stab at the slab of meat on his plate, brought it to his mouth, and took a generous bite. The moment the food touched his tongue all of Alfred's other thoughts became white noise. He started to scarf down his food faster than he ever had, he couldn't get enough. Ivan sat before him in shock, but it didn't last long for he knew Alfred would be like this. The blonde always had a big appetite and after days of no food, it was obvious that Alfred wouldn't be able to hold back. Ivan just sighed and went to eat his own meal. The taste of the meat felt as if he had open a treasure of gold and the urge to scarf it down was immense, but he had more restraint than Alfred.

By the time the food was cleared from every dish—bones picked clean and crumbs devoured— Alfred felt like he could sleep for days. Even in his current state of filth he felt like he could sleep without a care. The bed may be grimy but it was still warm.

"Alfred… Alfred, don't fall asleep," came Ivan's voice.

Alfred gave a hum as he felt his consciousness pull free from the welcoming tug of sleep.

"Come on, the bath is ready," Ivan said.

Alfred gave another hum, then cracked open his heavy eyelids to see servants standing by. They stood in a row with their eyes downcast, which he found odd but also grateful for. He was used to being naked in front of them, but this time was different.

"Come on, Alfred," Ivan said again, seeming to appear from thin air beside the bed.

Alfred stared at him for a second then nodded his head as a yawn escaped him. He then stretched a little, trying to relieve the stiffness and aching in his body before pulling free from the pillows he rested against.

"That's it," Ivan said encouragingly, then held out his hand for Alfred.

Alfred gave his hand to Ivan and was pulled off the bed gently. The second his feet touched the ground his knees buckled and the pain in his lower back shot up his spin, making him gasp as he fell into Ivan. Ivan was quick to tighten his grip, preventing them both from tumbling to the ground.

"Are you alright?" Ivan asked as he looked at his love.

"Y-Yeah, just haven't stood up in a while," Alfred said then pulled away from Ivan, but still held his hand.

Ivan smiled at him then grabbed a throw blanket that was caught between one of the bedposts and the mattress and draped it over Alfred. He didn't want the servants to see Alfred in his current state. He felt like the Alfred before him was his alone and even though he ordered the servants to keep their eyes down, the blanket added extra assurances. Ivan then pulled on Alfred's hand gently and guided him to the bath. When they stepped into the humid room, Ivan took the blanket from Alfred and laid it outside the door before closing it-leaving the servants to their work while they got cleaned.

Alfred looked at the room in awe, unlike his bath this one was larger and had the tub set into the floor. He stepped up to the tub and noticed that the water was tinted pink and breathed in the scent it was giving off. It was floral and woodsy, giving a relaxing scent that was extremely inviting.

"You need to sit on the edge and slide in," Ivan said, grabbing Alfred's attention.

He had forgotten he wasn't alone, and quickly turned to watch Ivan move past him and sit on the edge of the tub. He then slipped into the heated water and let out a sigh of relief, before moving towards Alfred.

"The water is perfect," Ivan commented then held out his hands.

Alfred nodded his head and sat down on the floor, only to wince from pain. Ivan didn't miss the look of discomfort and quickly moved to grab Alfred by his waist and pull him into the water. The second the water made contact with Alfred he felt the pain lessen and a deep sigh escape him.

"My Gods… this water is heaven," Alfred said with a moan.

"I had the servants add medicine to relieve the pain and stiffness you might have," Ivan informed as he sat down with Alfred in the tub, putting the blonde on his lap.

"Thank you," Alfred said in a soft voice, the relief he felt making him feel hazy. He leaned against Ivan's chest as he enjoyed the water, listening to Ivan's heartbeat and wiggling his toes in the water. Alfred couldn't bring himself to move, he felt like he could stay where he was for hours, but Ivan had other plans for him. Ivan reached back to grab a sponge that had been set beside the tub along with towels, and started to wash Alfred gently. He scrubbed away the filth that had built up over the past five days and marveled at the beauty that was Alfred. His tan freckled skin was littered with teeth marks and bruises. Ivan could even see his handprints in various spots and when he ran the sponge over those spots Alfred would react-whether it be a shiver, moan, or whimper.

"Open your legs."

Alfred blushed from the command but did as told. He spread his legs slightly, which was enough for Ivan to move the sponge between his thighs. Ivan saw his teeth marks more heavily on the plush thighs and he couldn't help but lick his lips. He found himself running his free hand over Alfred's left thigh and squeezed it gently as he pulled Alfred's legs apart more. He felt a need to just bury his face between those thighs and it only grew stronger when he saw Alfred's cock swaying in the water. Ivan could feel his own cock twitch as he looked at the body he had fell in love with.

"Ivan?"

Ivan opened his eyes, not realizing he had closed them, and noticed he was kissing Alfred's neck. His hands were holding Alfred close, one on Alfred's thigh and the other wrapped around his waist. The sponge long forgotten and lost in the water.

"Sorry, I just… I still want you." Ivan admitted raising his head a little and looking directly at Alfred amazingly blue eyes.

Alfred felt heat settle into his lower half and before he could think, he turned to kiss Ivan on the lips. He pressed his lips firmly to Ivan's and moved his hands to rest on his jaw and shoulder. He pushed his tongue forward, making Ivan open his mouth but he didn't back down. He pushed his tongue into Alfred's mouth and kissed back hungrily. They were locked into the kiss, both moaning and eager for more.

"I want you," came a sudden voice, both of them too caught up in each other to know who spoke. It didn't matter however, they knew what they wanted and they were quick to make it happen.

"Wait," Alfred said, ending their kiss. "Let me…" he trailed off as he focused solely on pulling away from Ivan.

Ivan stopped his advances a little reluctantly but let Alfred do what he wished. The blonde moved from Ivan's lap to turn around completely, and straddle him. Ivan's heart was racing as he felt Alfred against him, now that they were chest to chest, he could feel the erection that Alfred was sporting. It made his own cock stiffen even more, and his need for the blonde increased. He pulled on Alfred's hips to bring him in for a searing kiss, and Alfred moaned as he kissed back. They kissed each other breathless, and when they finally pulled apart they felt the throes of their heat once more. They moved on instinct in the water, Ivan moving a hand lower to open Alfred's well-used hole, Alfred bracing himself against the tub's edge so Ivan could penetrate him. He sank down onto the throbbing cock under him, the aches and pains he felt no longer present as he seated himself on Ivan.

Ivan growled once he was sheathed in Alfred, and squeezed Alfred's hips as he started to kiss and bite his neck. Alfred groaned from the attention and started to move his body, rocking on Ivan's cock slowly, but gradually getting faster. The washroom was soon filled with the resonating sounds of their moans and curses, and the sound of water sloshing and splashing onto the floor. Alfred held onto the tub edge as if his life depended on it as he bounced in his husband's lap.

"I can't hold back!" he cried as he thrust down sharply.

"Let it out," Ivan replied, his voice thick with an accent.

Alfred whimpered then threw his head back in a broken scream as Ivan bucked upwards. He could feel Ivan's knot shove itself into him and stay there as he kept bucking his hips. Alfred couldn't find his voice as he was overcome with pleasure and came hard into the water. His fingers clawed into the tile flooring and his toes curled as he shivered with bliss. He felt like he would faint when he heard Ivan suck in a harsh breath as he came. Ivan's thick manhood filled Alfred to the brim with cum and the blonde found himself losing his strength. He let go of the tub and fell back into the water, but Ivan used what strength he had to pull Alfred towards him and laid him against his chest.

"Alfred?" Ivan panted as he held Alfred tightly to his chest.

"I'm fine… Just… a little dizzy," Alfred replied as he pressed his forehead against Ivan's shoulder.

"Can you wait a little longer?" Ivan asked as he adjusted his hold on Alfred, testing how tight his knot was. "I will carry you to bed the second I can."

Alfred gave a slight nod then turned his head to look up at Ivan. Ivan looked back and smiled at Alfred before brushing aside some of Alfred's hair; he then dragged his hand down Alfred's jaw and then his chin. Alfred pulled up a tired arm from the water to do the same to Ivan, except he stopped his fingers on Ivan's lips. He smiled at Ivan then moved his hand to pull Ivan down gently for a kiss.

୨.❀.୧

Violet eyes slowly opened as sunlight shown on them, making Ivan wince slightly as he awoke from his slumber. He breathed deeply as he got adjusted to the bright light, but then felt his nose become tickled by something soft. He wiggled his nose to rid himself of the odd sensation and looked down to see a mop of unruly blonde hair being the cause of it. He smiled softly as he looked at the golden strands sticking up every which way in the sunlight then moved down to kiss a tan shoulder. Ivan then rested his chin on the shoulder and looked down the body he was holding. Alfred was still fast asleep, his chest rising and falling gently. His tan skin was bathed in sunlight which showed the many dark marks that covered every inch of him. Ivan felt proud yet a little embarrassed and guilty by what he had down over the past several days.

He had never thought he'd be so aggressive, or so possessive. He was actually a little concerned for how worn out Alfred looked and moved to try and get a better look of his queen, but he was unable to. The second he moved not only did Alfred whine, but he felt his cock tug a little. It was this moment that he realized he was still sheathed in Alfred and that there wasn't much slick or cum to allow for an easy removal. Ivan sighed softly then carefully backed up to reach for the bedside table. There he found the lubricant that was left by the servants just a few days ago and grabbed it. He then poured the clear liquid into his hand and applied it to his manhood and Alfred's hole as best as he could. It took some time but he managed to pull free without waking Alfred.

He breathed a sigh of relief then moved to gently roll Alfred onto his back and pulled back the bedding. He surveyed the markings on the blonde and wondered if Alfred would really be okay. He knew from his lessons that this was typical of any mating that happened during heat, and that it could have been worse. But reading about it and seeing it are two different things. He just wanted to clean Alfred up and make him as comfortable as possible. He wanted to hold him gently and apologize for getting so rough, but he didn't do any of that. Instead, he sat on the bed watching Alfred, wanting to let him sleep as much as he could.

 ***** "Ty takaya krasivaya." Ivan said absentmindedly in a hushed voice, as if it was secret, but in fact it was the first line of a poem he remembered. "Moye dykhaniye budet ukradeno. Tvoi glaza i ulybka vzyali moyu silu, i ya upala. Vash um chudo, i vasha lyubov' v yarosti. YA ne mog zhit' tak, kak kogda-to ran'she. Vy zakhvatili menya. Potomu chto ty prekrasna."

"Did you make that yourself?"

Ivan shot his head up when he heard the voice and came face to face with his love.

"I-Im sorry, I didn't mean to wake you!" Ivan said quickly as his face got impossibly hot. "I, I thought I was quiet…"

Alfred smiled at Ivan and moved to sit up but winced. Now that his heat was over, his body was racked with pain and sensitivity. Ivan was quick to come to his aid and apologized profusely as he helped prop Alfred up against the pillows.

"There is nothing to apologize for," Alfred said once he was comfortable again. "I knew this would happen. It was my first heat and I knew what to expect."

Ivan didn't know what to say and just sat on the edge of the bed.

"So, did you make that poem?" Alfred asked, bringing up the fact that he had heard Ivan.

Ivan's blush came back at the question and he nodded. "I had written it long ago, but I have never spoken it aloud to another."

Alfred felt a smile stretch across his face as heard this. "It's quite lovely. Tell it again, I woke up at the love part," he said.

Ivan's blush only worsened but he agreed to recite it. He moved to lay beside Alfred and stared up at the canopy of the bed as he tried to calm his nervous heart.

"You are beautiful," he said softly, still nervous to have a conscious audience and speaking in Alfred's language. "My breath be stolen. Your eyes and smile have taken my strength, and I have fallen. Your mind is a wonder and your love is furious. I could not live as I did once previous. You have captured me. For you are beautiful."

Alfred felt like his heart was melting in his chest when Ivan finished and moved his hand to hold Ivan's.

"I like it," he said softly. "You should tell it to me again some time."

Ivan smiled at hearing that and moved Alfred's hand to his lips to place a kiss on his knuckles. "I shall do as my Queen asks."

Alfred let out a snort of a laugh then leaned his aching body to kiss Ivan on the cheek. He then rested his head on Ivan's shoulder and squeezed Ivan's hand lightly.

"What shall we do now, my King?"

Ivan hummed as he thought of the question.

"A bath would be nice, and then food," he suggested and looked to Alfred for confirmation.

"Sounds perfect."

* * *

***This** poem was something I made up on the fly and thus used google  & bing translate. Sorry if it's not correct u.u

 ****Also,** sorry for takign so long, but ya know, work, lack of motivation, life :T But thank you for reading and sticking with me all this time! Chapter 10 is already underway and I hope it wont take me two fuckin months to write. OH! and I have a Kofi now! So if ya liked to tip me for my fics that'd be awesome! Tips for Fics! lol ( https://ko-fi.com/quinten )


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***Warnings: Mild Death

**Chapter 10.1**

୨.❀.୧

The day that Alfred and Ivan were free to leave their marital chambers was not as exciting as either of them had thought. After sleeping through an entire day it seemed like the world was determined to bring them from their sense of peace and relaxation. It started with a letter that one of the servants delivered to Alfred.

"What is this?" he asked as he sat up in bed.

"A letter from your family, my Queen," said the servant.

"Oh?" Alfred looked at the envelop that housed the letter and felt sadness weighing on his heart. "This must be their farewell." he said softly, and opened the letter slowly. He knew he was going to be left behind. He knew it was going to happen, but a part of him hoped, like a foolish child, that his family would stay with him, or just a little longer.

'To our precious Alfred, we are sorry to have left you without a goodbye, but we hope this letter will suffice. We are all happy for you and Ivan and we hope to hear good news from you both in the coming weeks. We wish you both love and safety as you start this new part of your life. No matter what happens, we will always be here for you.

Love you always.'

Tears threatened to fall as he read the letter, his heart aching for the loss of his family. Ivan could sense the loneliness from Alfred and wrapped an arm around Alfred's shoulder. Alfred took a shaky breath as he let Ivan hold him and held the letter in a tight fist.

"It will be alright, you will see them again," Ivan assured and Alfred just nodded meekly. He then turned to the servant who had brought the letter, noticing he was still there. "Is there something else we must know?"

The servant nodded his head then took a deep breath before saying, "King Mikhail is dying." Ivan tensed as he heard this and Alfred looked at him with concern. "The doctors have noticed his health has declined even more… They believe he won't make it through the rest of the week."

"Is it really true?" Ivan asked.

"Yes," the servant said with a nod of his head. "Preparations for his death is already underway as requested by Queen Katyusha."

Ivan fell silent for a moment, then nodded his head.

"Thank you, for telling me… You can leave now." he said then turned to the other servants who had come to get them ready for their day. "All of you, leave."

The servants froze but quickly bowed and left the room, closing the door behind them. Ivan took his arm from Alfred and rubbed his hands over his face. Alfred looked at Ivan with worry and placed a gentle hand on his shoulder.

"Are you alright, Ivan? Do you need me to go as well?"

Ivan let out a deep breath then shook his head.

"No. I don't know how I feel. I always thought I would be happy when the day came, but now…" Ivan trailed off and pulled his hands down slightly to uncover his eyes. Alfred could see the distress he was in and moved to pull Ivan's hands down completely and hold them.

"It is okay to feel conflicted Ivan, you have a difficult relationship with him." Ivan hummed to this, his face void of emotion, and Alfred sighed softly. "Whatever you feel, be sadness, anger, or even joy, I will be here for you."

Ivan didn't say anything to this, but instead acted. He pulled Alfred close to him hugging him tightly then fell back onto the bed.

"Why should I feel sorrow for a man who has hurt me in every way he could?" Ivan asked aloud.

Alfred tried to think of an answer but he was drawing blanks.

"I—I wish I could tell you." Alfred said a little disappointed. "I'm not much help after all."

Ivan gave a dry chuckle and moved to kiss the top of Alfred's head.

"You are helping, do not doubt that."

Alfred felt happy at hearing that and nodded his head. They laid on the bed for a while longer before a knock came to the door. Ivan sighed and move to answer the door, and had a look of surprise when he was faced with his younger sister.

"Father wishes to see you both, Ivan," Natalia said flatly, but her usual piercing stare seemed softened.

Ivan studied her for a moment before saying, "We will be there shortly."

**...... **

Ivan stood stiffly before his father's chamber door with Alfred by his side. He could feel the press of Alfred's arm against his, but the touch didn't comfort him much. He had half a mind to just leave and let whatever his father had to say die with him, but a part of him was curious. Perhaps in his dying hours his father would apologize for his actions. Perhaps he would say that he was proud of Ivan all this time and only used harsh words to express it. Perhaps he would tell him a secret that would change Ivan's very mindset on life. All very alluring, far fetched, ideas that had Ivan raising his hand to open the door.

He pushed the door inwards and stepped inside with caution, Alfred's body never leaving his side. When he looked inside, he found his father to be alone, probably having rid himself of servants seeing that there was no hope.

"Oh, Ivan," Alfred gasped softly, bringing Ivan's attention to the place Alfred was looking.

On the bed was Ivan's father looking as pale and frail as death them self. His darkened eyelids where closed as he laid unbelievably still in a bed that looked like it had swallowed half his body. All Ivan could think was, _'He's gone?'_

"Has, has he pass—"

Alfred was cut off as a shaky breath was heard followed by a cough. Both of the young royals flinched from surprise as the dying king seemed to be revived before their eyes. A sense of relief came over Ivan as he saw his father open his eyes and look at him with the same indifferent stare he held for the past twenty years.

"You have finally come," Mikhail said weakly, his once deep and rough voice a mere shadow of itself. "Come closer," he ordered.

Ivan obeyed, but held out his arm to push Alfred behind him, out of reach and view of his father. He knew the man was unable to move, but his paranoia made him think otherwise. Mikhail didn't seemed bothered by it and looked at his son.

"When you were born I had hope that my son would be as strong as me… but… as you grew, I realized it was hopeless," Mikhail started, and Ivan felt his jaw tense. "No matter what I did you only had compassion and tears in your eyes. I used to wonder if you was ever really mine, but I see now that you have become at least half of a man," he continued, then coughed roughly.

Ivan felt confusion and disgust settle in his stomach as he heard this. The man's breaths were numbered and he was wasting them on insulting his only son. Ivan felt like saying something back, finally standing up to his tormentor. He could do it and walk away unscathed, right? His father could barely keep his eyes open, so he wouldn't have to fear a beating that would end his life.

"Ivan." Ivan was pulled from his thoughts as he heard his name and focused back on his father. He had calmed his coughing and his voice sounded hoarse. "I don't regret my choices in this life. I have lived my best and I see what I have done. You will take care of this kingdom, your queen, and your sisters." He said sternly as he closed his eyes, too weak to keep them open any longer. "The children you two will have will be a precious asset, so protect them as well." Mikhail coughed again, less rough than before, and with each cough Ivan's teeth ground together and his blank expression became harder to maintain. "Do—Do not trust others, too quickly either." He said catching his breath. "The others may seem friendly… but that will be your undoing. Do not disappointment me in the afterlife, boy." Mikhail finished, taking a deep breath to ease his worn out throat.

Ivan felt something in him snap when his father finally fell silent. He had taken his father's harsh words and abuse for as long as he could remember and he had enough. His father was dying, there was no consequences to fear. He was king now, and his father couldn't touch him even if he tried. Ivan let his mask break, his lips tugged down in a grimace and his brows furrowed. He opened his mouth to speak, but he froze, all his pent-up anger tightened into a knot in his throat and chest as he looked at his father.

"No," he said gruffly then held his hand up to his father's face. "No, no no no."

"Ivan?" Alfred asked worriedly.

"You can't die when I finally—" Ivan chokes on his words as tears come to his eyes. Alfred wide-eyed at hearing this and reached out to touch Ivan, but Ivan shrugged off his touch and slammed his hands down on the bed. Ivan then grabbed his father by his arms, and started to shake the man.

"You do not have the _right_ to leave! After everything you put me through—! You have hurt me ever since I was child and not once did you apologize, not once did you care! All you wanted from me was to be as cold and merciless as you, you selfish bastard! All the lies you told and the lives you made me take—" Ivan took a shaky breath as he poured out his heart. "I will never be like you! I will never treat my children as an asset! You heartless—" Ivan choked on a sob and squeezes his father's arms. He could feel his fingers digging into his palms, realizing that his father was nothing more than skin and bone. His once muscular arms that could back hand him with great force was nothing more than a twig. "How dare you leave!" Ivan took his right hand from his father's arm and raised it in a fist. He held it high and was ready to release all his anger and pain in one hit. He had dreamt of doing this for years, of getting rid of his father and becoming the kind of man that he wanted to be. Someone worthy of love.

"Ivan…"

Alfred's soft voice reached Ivan with disturbing clarity. His fist shook with pent up energy but it slowly came down.

"Damn it all!" Ivan shouted.

Alfred flinched from the shout but remained as calm as he could. He had never seen Ivan this way and it terrified him. Alfred knew Ivan's feeling were justifiable, but he couldn't bear to see Ivan like that. He reached out to the man who now sat on the floor crying at the edge of the bed. Ivan tensed from the hand that touched him, then looked up to see Alfred.

"Let's go Ivan."

Ivan sniffled then turned back to his father.

"It is typical of him to let me suffer." Ivan said bitterly then rubbed at his face as he stood up. He tried to calm down but his tears wouldn't let up.

"Ivan—" Alfred reached out to pull Ivan's face towards him, but right then the door to the bedroom opened. Guards flooded in and Natalia followed them. She stared at her brother then Alfred, then their father who laid crookedly in the bed. Ivan stared back at her and when their eyes met he said, "He is dead. Call for the undertaker."

Natalia only nodded and sent one of the guards out to do the task. Ivan took that moment to leave the room himself, walking past Alfred and his Natalia as tears still streamed down his face.

"Ivan!" Alfred called out, trying to follow the man.

"Let him go," Natalia said, making Alfred stop. "He is better off alone."

Alfred stared after the hunched-over back of his husband and hoped to the gods that he would be okay.

୨.❀.୧

Funerals in Sunre were more of a celebration of life. There was sorrow and hurt, but the joy of knowing that a life was lived made the event a celebration. The people would dance and share stories of the one they lost, vibrant colors would be on display under a bright sun, leading the spirit to a better place. However, this could not be said for Owleta, and the nervousness that coursed through Alfred's body made him shiver in the cool morning air. He stood in the royal graveyard watching as two men opened a mausoleum and two others set down the coffin of the former king. There was no music, no sunshine, no color—just silence, grey skies, and black clothes. The Braginsky family crest was the only pop of color as it was laid across Mikhail's coffin.

Alfred felt suffocated by anxiety as he stood there, and when his eyes drifted to his left, seeing Ivan ramrod straight with a blank expression on his face, he might as well have been a stranger. Ivan had lost his father—a man Alfred knew caused Ivan great pain, but his father nonetheless. Ivan hadn't said a word or shown any emotion through the whole event or even in the days leading up to the funeral. He had become closed off, and whenever Alfred tried to talk to him about it, he would only say, "Everything is fine." It bothered Alfred to no end, but he wasn't going to give up.

He looked back at crowd gathered around the mausoleum and the priest speaking, none of them paying much mind to Ivan or himself. He then looked down to see Ivan's hand laying stiffly at his side and Alfred slowly reached out with his index finger. His finger only grazed Ivan's hand before the head priest took Ivan from him.

"We will now have King Ivan speak," the priest announced suddenly.

Alfred quickly took his hand back, like a child worried about getting caught, and watched Ivan walk up to the head of the church. Ivan looked ahead at his family, the court, and a few royals that had made the trip with a cold stare.

"My father was an unyielding force that drove this kingdom to the state it is—strong, reliable, and fearless," he began. "He never backed down and he never underestimated his rivals. In his place I will take this kingdom to new heights. I will make Owleta the strongest it will ever be. My father will be missed, but this is not a time to mourn."

When Ivan finished the head priest placed a hand on Ivan's shoulder and nodded his head in agreement.

"Such strong words from a promising King," the priest complimented.

The crowd nodded in agreement as the mausoleum was closed and locked. The burial was finished and Ivan invited everyone to a meal at his castle before they had to go. Many accepted the offer and Alfred followed Ivan silently when he walked to the carriage. The ride back to the castle was silent, even though Alfred wanted to speak. Ivan's sisters weren't making any attempts to break the silence either—Natalia looked out the window with a vacant stare, a mirror of Ivan, and Katyusha just held a look of sadness. Alfred gave a soft sigh and let his mind wander until they reached the castle.

**......**

Alfred felt annoyed as he sat through the lunch surrounded by royals he didn't care to speak with. His focus was Ivan, all the words he wished to speak were stuck in his throat. He needed to talk to Ivan, to know what he was thinking, feeling, and it felt like a decade had passed before the chance arose. The meal was finished and the royals began to wade out of the castle for their journey home. Alfred was quick to follow Ivan, who was seeing the guests out.

"Ivan, wait a moment," Alfred said as he caught up to Ivan, but Ivan didn't stop. "Please, just a word." Alfred begged and grabbed onto Ivan's shirt.

Ivan stopped walking but didn't face him.

"Alfred, enough. We have guests to see off." Ivan said flatly.

"Let them go," Alfred stated, which finally got Ivan to turn and face him. "I'm worried for you, not them! Ever since you talked to your father you have been so distant. I feel like you are leaving me!"

Ivan's blank expression seemed to soften for a second and Ivan let out a sigh and rubbed the back of his neck.

"Alfred… I'm not leaving you, I…" Ivan tailed off as he tried to think of what to say, but his train of thought was lost completely as Katyusha appeared in the corridor. Her sadden eyes looked right through him and he heaved another sigh. "We will talk later."

Alfred had a look of hurt come to his face, but Ivan didn't say any more as he walked off to his sister.

"You are leaving?" he asked once he was close enough.

Katyusha nodded her head then touched Ivan's arm lightly to suggest he walk with her.

"I know you wish for me to stay, but I cannot. Sadik is waiting for me at home and I miss him dearly," she admitted.

"I understand," Ivan said and Katyusha bumped into him gently.

"You will be fine. Alfred will be with you," she replied, "But you need to let him in."

"What do you mean?" Ivan asked.

Katyusha gave a sigh and stopped walking to look at him.

"You have a tendency to draw into yourself, dear brother," she said. "Ever since you were young, whenever something bad happened you became distant, shouldering your troubles alone."

"I didn't want to be a burden on you or Natalia," Ivan admitted.

"I know that's what Father taught you, but he is gone now. You can't keep letting yourself fall into these states. You need to talk to Alfred."

"He wouldn't understand," said Ivan. "I have tried before, but… it's difficult."

"Not everything can be easy, Ivan," she replied. " It takes time and effort, and the more you open up, the easier it will become. Don't think so little of your Queen or yourself. You are strong and kind, but oh so dimwitted."

Ivan let out a dry laugh and Katyusha smiled softly at him.

"Perhaps you are right…"

"Perhaps I am."

"But—" Ivan stopped, then let out a heavy sigh. "I will try."

"That is all you can do," Katyusha said softly then moved to hug her brother tightly. "Write to me as often as you can."

"I will."

Katyusha pulled away from the embrace and started walking once more. This time Ivan stayed behind and watched his sister leave. He knew she was right, but what she was asking of him made him feel anxious. He didn't want to hurt Alfred, but he already knew he had. He wasn't their father, he never planned to be, but this side of him that had been crafted since childhood was hard to dismiss.

_"I feel like you are leaving me!"_

Ivan felt the weight of guilt and fatigue as Alfred's words ran through his mind. He pressed his hands to his face as he took a deep breath to try and clear his head.

_'All I need to do is talk…'_

"My King?"

Ivan snapped out his troubled thoughts with a start, and turned around to find that he wasn't alone. His newly appointed advisor, Eduard, stood before him with curiosity on his face.

"Yes?" Ivan asked slowly as he regained his composure.

"Are you alright, Sire?" Eduard asked as he eyed Ivan.

"I'm quite fine." he said quickly. "What is it?"

"Ah, yes, the court is in need of you. The last of the guests have been seen off by Queen Alfred and it is now time for you to become familiar with the Kingdom."

Ivan nodded his head and followed his advisor to the office that quickly became something akin to a prison cell.


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ***Warnings: Mild Death | Blood

**Chapter 10.2**

୨.❀.୧

Ivan knew that running a kingdom was tedious and that there would always be problems, but what he walked into was far beyond what he expected.

"If we trade with more southern kingdoms then we could make up for what we lack in resources and increase the money we receive."

"Yes, but we are not on very good terms with that many kingdoms in the south, and if we increase trade too much we will only ensure the mining issues."

"Right, we still need to find more mineral rich areas to dig or it won't matter how much trading we do."

"But if we mine too much then the integrity of the mountains will collapse leaving us open."

"Which we don't need to do since there is word of unfaithfulness within the treaty of 8 Kings. It is easier to start a war when a new King is crowned."

"Perhaps we should just raise the taxes."

"No." The voices silenced and Ivan got up from his desk. He glared tiredly at the men around him, the six men of the Owletan Court and his advisor. "I refuse to tax our people any more than they are. We already know what will happen if we do."

The room stayed silent as the memory of a civil war crawled through the court members' minds.

"Then what shall we do? The peasants are already restless," said Viktor, the fourth member of the court.

"If action is not taken quickly, I fear for this kingdom's future," Ilya, the sixth member, commented.

Ivan pinched the bridge of his nose then let out a sigh. "I don't know, but there has to be a solution. Just—"

At that moment a knock came to the study door and Ivan gave permission to whoever was on the other side.

"Sorry to interrupt, but dinner is served. The Queen awaits you."

Ivan stared at the servant then looked to the clock on his wall. It was going on six in the evening, well past the time Ivan thought he'd be still discussing the Kingdom's issues.

"Alright, I will be there shortly."

"But the issues—"

"One cannot think on an empty stomach," Ivan replied curtly, making Ilya fall silent, as he moved from behind his desk. "Thank you for coming and I will let my advisor, Eduard, show you out. Have a pleasant evening."

With that Ivan left and didn't stop until he was nearly at the dining hall. He leaned against a wall and found himself breathing harshly, as if he hadn't been breathing the entire time he walked. He had felt suffocated in the presence of the court and the stress of the kingdom made him feel weary. He was trying to be the man he wanted to be, but it seemed the court wasn't having it. They wanted cold swift judgment and Ivan wanted compassion.

"Gods, just don't think about it. It's time for a break," Ivan told himself, but he had already given himself a headache.

He took a deep breath and rubbed his forehead with kneading fingers before walking into the dining hall. There he found Alfred seated at the end of the table pushing his food around. He didn't even bother to look up at Ivan, which only made the man realize that things were still not fixed between them.

"Good evening Alfred," Ivan greeted, trying to sound at ease.

"Evenin'."

Ivan frowned slightly and moved to take his seat at the opposite end of the table. Ivan looked at his food, seeing it was a rack of meat paired with roasted vegetables and a glass of wine. It looked heavenly and Ivan wanted nothing more to scarf it down, but distracted himself from the urge.

"So, how was your day?" Ivan asked, his voice echoing in the large room.

"Fine."

Ivan was about to put a forkful of vegetables in his mouth when he heard the meek answer and stopped. He looked at Alfred from the other end of the table then sighed and set down his fork. He got up from his seat and gathered his plate and wine and walked down to Alfred's seat. He placed his food next to Alfred then sat down. Alfred looked over at Ivan, but didn't turn his head, and Ivan just gave a small smile.

"Alfred, tell me what I need to do to cheer you up."

Alfred sighed then straightened up in his chair to look at Ivan properly. "I just want you to talk to me." he said. "Ever since my heat ended you seemed to have disappeared! You don't talk to me, lay with me, or even acknowledge me half the time!"

Ivan felt guilty as he heard this. He knew it was his fault, but he could never find the right moment to talk to Alfred, it was always work or sleep. Even during their shared meals, it was mostly quick eating or spent in silence. It was as if a wall had been put up between them and Ivan hadn't noticed until it was too late.

"I'm sorry. I hadn't meant to," Ivan confessed even though his expression didn't convey it.

"I know, but I'm just so worried for you," Alfred said, though his voice sounded strained. "Ever since your father died you have changed and I have tried my best to get through to you, but you—See! You are doing it right now! That dumb look on your face!"

"I am not making a look!" Ivan defended.

"That is what I am talking about!" Alfred stated then gave a frustrated sigh. "I just—I—" Alfred let out a disgruntled noise then moved to get up, but Ivan grabbed his hand.

"Wait!"

Alfred stopped and gave an expectant look to Ivan. "Alfred, I… I know we have not talked and I have been meaning to, I promise. Ever since the funeral I had been thinking of what I wanted to say, but then the court started to demand more of my time and I can't say no to them. I am sorry. I… I am trying to be the man I want to be, but it's difficult."

"Ivan…"

"Katyusha was right, I am dimwitted."

Alfred heaved a heavy breath and sat back down in his seat.

"Ivan, you are dimwitted, but at least you finally look like you used to." Ivan looked up at Alfred with confusion and Alfred moved to cradle his face in his hands. "You always had this look about you that made me happy. I don't know what it was, but after your father passed you became so void of expression that it worried me. I don't know what kind of man your trying to be, but don't lock me out anymore. You don't have to do everything alone, I am your Queen and I am meant to support you." Alfred finished.

Ivan stared at Alfred blankly then frowned as Alfred rubbed his cheek. He reached up to hold Alfred's hands and caressed them as he thought about what Alfred said.

"I want to tell you that I promise, but I can not guarantee that." Ivan admitted and Alfred just gave a soft smile.

"I know, but you are willing to try and that's all I care about."

Ivan nodded his head as he looked at Alfred. The guilt he felt lingered but relief still managed to settle in. He knew he needed to make it up to Alfred for the way he had been acting for the past few weeks.

"I forgot how beautiful your eyes are," Ivan said suddenly and reached out to touch Alfred's face. "I have been in that study far too much."

Alfred felt something in him break at hearing those words and his brilliant blue eyes welled up with tears. Ivan wiped them away then leaned over to place a kiss on Alfred's lips. It was full of longing and love; something Ivan hadn't realized he was missing until now.

"I'm sorry," he murmured when he ended the kiss.

"It's okay. I'm just glad I'm not alone anymore," Alfred said as he blinked more tears from his eyes.

Ivan felt his guilt increase at hearing this and pulled away from Alfred to get up from his chair. He then pulled Alfred's chair back then stooped down to pick him up bridal style.

"I-Ivan, what—?"

"We can eat later. Right now I need to take care of you." Ivan said with a determined look.

Alfred felt his face heat up at the implications of what Ivan had planned and held onto him as he was carried to their room.

The second they arrived Alfred opened the door and Ivan kicked it shut. He quickly put Alfred on the bed and took off his shoes before taking off his own. He then climbed on top of Alfred and started to kiss him all over. Alfred smiled and giggled from each kiss that was pressed to his face and neck and soon his chest and stomach once Ivan unbuttoned his shirt. Alfred's giggles turned into soft moans as he felt those needy lips burn a trail down his body and eager hands undo his pants. He looked down at Ivan, watching him undress him, and bit his bottom lip once his cock was freed.

"Ivan," moaned Alfred.

"You don't have to do anything, moye solnyshko," Ivan said before placing kisses on Alfred's cock.

Alfred shivered and gasped from the sudden attention he was getting and could barely contain himself. He felt like crying again as Ivan took his manhood into his mouth and started to suck on it earnestly.

"G-Gods!"

Alfred arched his back, but Ivan's strong hands kept his hips down. Ivan bobbed his head up and down quickly, taking every inch of Alfred's cock down his throat. It didn't take much longer for Alfred to cum, Ivan's name spilled from his lips as he shot his cum down Ivan's throat. Ivan didn't let him go though, continuing to suck him through the orgasm. He almost choked from how much cum Alfred gave, but kept it all down.

"Holy hell," Alfred breathed and frantically moved his hands down to grab Ivan's hair. He pulled the man up so he could see him and kissed him without a care. He clung to Ivan as he kissed him deeply, moaning softly.

"Make love to me."

"Of course."

Ivan pulled away from Alfred and stripped out of his clothing completely. When he was finally bare and moved to get back on the bed, he found Alfred propped up on pillows and his legs spread wide. Ivan couldn't believe that he had ignored Alfred for so long when the blonde meant so much to him.

"You are perfect," Ivan said in a hushed voice.

Alfred's blush grew darker at the comment and Ivan couldn't help but lean in to steal a kiss. Ivan slipped his hand down to Alfred's awaiting hole as he kissed Alfred hotly. Alfred groaned as he felt Ivan's fingers press at his entrance and slip in with ease. Alfred's slick was already drenching the sheets and it made Ivan growl with anticipation. He couldn't wait any longer and pulled his fingers out to rub the slick on his aching cock. He then guided it to Alfred's entrance and pushed in gently, not wanting to hurt his love. Alfred's breath hitched as he felt Ivan fill him and he clawed at Ivan's back.

"Are you alright?" Ivan asked as he felt Alfred's fingers cut into his skin.

"Y-Yeah, just… so big…"

Ivan gave a weak laugh and rested his head on Alfred's shoulder until he loosened his hold.

"Okay?"

"Okay."

Ivan pulled back a little to have a better angle and began to thrust deep and steady. Alfred shivered under Ivan and held onto his arms as he felt every inch of Ivan's manhood slide in and out of him. Everything felt so different and smelled different from when they had sex in heat. Alfred didn't know if that was a good or bad thing, but when Ivan thrust into a certain spot he didn't care anymore. A broken scream left his lips and he demanded more. Ivan didn't have to be told twice and pumped his hips faster. Alfred couldn't control his voice for anything and cried out for Ivan. Everything felt so good and when Ivan held him close, kissing away his breath and moans, he couldn't take it. Alfred gasped sharply and let out a whine as he came. Ivan was right with him, cumming deep in Alfred and filling him up. He growled Alfred's name as he kept thrusting his hips until he was satisfied.

They laid together back to chest, Ivan's cock still deep in Alfred due to the knot. They laid in silence, just catching their breath, but the sound of Alfred's stomach growling interrupted the post sex haze. Ivan couldn't help the laugh that escaped him, but Alfred shut him up by gently pinching his arm.

"I can't help it that someone dragged me away from dinner to have sex," Alfred defended with a huff.

Ivan just smiled and kissed Alfred's neck and shoulder.

"Sorry, I will call for a servant to bring us something."

**......**

When morning came Alfred woke up to find that he wasn't alone for the first time in weeks. He could feel strong arms wrapped around him and warm breath against his back. Alfred turned over gently, careful not to wake his husband, and smiled at seeing his slightly blurry face.

"I have missed this," he whispered as he brushed some of Ivan's hair to the side.

He felt like he could lay there forever, just watching Ivan sleep soundly and play with his silver hair idly. Alas, Ivan couldn't stay asleep with Alfred's ticklish fingers in his hair and woke up with a heavy sigh.

"Morning, my love," Ivan said softly.

"Good morning, my Vanya."

Ivan raised an eyebrow at hearing this and smiled as he took a deep breath. "You found nickname for me?"

"Yep. Thought I'd study the more friendly side of your language."

Ivan opened his violet eyes slowly and smiled even wider at seeing Alfred. "You look cute."

Alfred grinned like a fool as he heard Ivan speak. Morning Ivan was quickly becoming his favorite. Alfred was going to make a comment about this, but a knock came to the bedroom door.

"My King! My Queen! Please rise!" came a frantic voice.

Ivan frowned in a way that had Alfred giggling like a child, but as the voice persisted the humor was lost. Ivan groaned as he got up and walked over to the door, not caring that he was naked. He yanked it open and was faced with Eduard, his advisor. The man's face turned a deep red upon seeing the King, but he was snapped out of it when Ivan asked him what he wanted.

"U-Uh, the court! That's right, they have a thief in their custody!"

"A thief?" Ivan asked, his brain slowly catching up.

"Yes, he was caught smuggling our goods through the mountains at sunrise. The peasants are furious because he caused damage to one of the mines, making it collapse, and the court wants you to handle it!"

When Ivan head this, he felt himself become alert. "Was anyone hurt?" he asked.

"Thankfully, no. The miners had not arrived there yet."

"Alright, let me get dressed."

Eduard nodded and Ivan shut the door. He quickly threw on an outfit and Alfred did as well, not sure if he was needed or not.

"What will you do?" Alfred asked, having heard the conversation.

"I don't know, but it will be okay." Ivan said as he finished tying his boots.

They hurried out of the bedroom and took a carriage ride to the court building. It seemed like everyone in the kingdom was crowding the building shouting and screaming as Ivan and Alfred arrived. Alfred was worried things would go badly, but trusted Ivan to be careful as they left their carriage and went inside. The Court building was half the size of their castle and sat on the right side of the river.

"So glad you could join us, your Highnesses," said Dimitri, the oldest and first member of the court, as Ivan and Alfred were escorted into the courtroom.

"You should already know the situation here, but I will reiterate for record purposes." Gravil the third member. "This man here—" The thief in question was chained to the floor with two guards on either side of him, looking dirty and beaten by the looks of the bruises he sported. "—has stolen from the kingdom four pounds of precious minerals that would cost thousands. Fortunately they were lost on the mountain after the mine tunnel that he was in collapsed, causing the mountain to quake under his feet. His loss of balance allowed us to catch him when the guards went to investigate the mine. This man has cost us millions in damages with the loss of this mine. So, King Ivan, Queen Alfred, what shall we do with him?"

Alfred looked at Ivan in shock and Ivan kept his eyes on the court, but their silence didn't settle with peasants. They began to yell out their own ideas of punishment, some even calling Ivan unfit to be king. Ivan wasn't deaf to them, but he knew what the court was doing. The look in their cold eyes was the same twisted enjoyment his father held when he'd watch Ivan suffer.

"Ivan?"

Alfred reached out to Ivan, but he held up his hand. The court room fell silent and Ivan walked over to the guard by the thief and took his sword from him. The unsheathed blade glimmered in the light and Ivan placed it in front of the thief.

"What do you say to these accusations?" Ivan asked, his voice devoid of emotion.

"To hell with you and Owleta! You sit here rich while others struggle! _To hell with_ —"

The thief's words were lost to the sound of the sword being swung around and cutting off his head. Ivan locked eyes on everyone in the courtroom, staring them all down, then faced the court.

"If you deem it reasonable to waste my time with these thieves, then I suggest you think twice. I am your King, not a dog! I may not be my father, but I will not tolerate slander! Face me like a man or hide!"

One of the elders started to clap after a beat of silence and gradually the others followed.

"Well done, My King."

Ivan glared at them, but said nothing more and handed the sword back to the guard who offered him a handkerchief. As Ivan wiped off the blood as best he could he looked up to see that Alfred was no longer in the room.

"Sire, the Queen is waiting in the carriage."

Ivan gave a stiff nod and left, leaving the kingdom in awe, but once he was in the carriage there was not such admirement. Alfred was silent, his blank expression betraying the boiling anger inside. Ivan didn't know what to say, but Alfred did.

"I wish you hadn't done that." Ivan opened his mouth in an attempt to speak reason, but Alfred held up his hand. "Don't speak to me until we get back."

Ivan sighed but nodded and spent the ride back staring at his bloodstained hands.

When they arrived at the castle Ivan ignored the servants trying to clean the blood and Eduard who tried to speak to him about the thief. His focus was on Alfred and he followed him blindly through the castle until they were in their bedroom. The room was mess with clothes and bedding thrown about and Alfred sat on the bed in a huff, but Ivan kept his distance.

"Okay, I want to know… why? Just, why Ivan?"

"It was all I could do," Ivan said simply.

"No," Alfred said sternly. "No, you could have sent him to prison, but you killed him instead. Did you even think or consider that I might have an idea?"

"Yes, I thought about it, and no I didn't… but it was still the only option I could take," Ivan said through clenched teeth. Alfred gave Ivan a look of disbelief. "It was a test, Alfred! If I hadn't killed him then I would have failed! They want a king like my father and I—"

"I thought you didn't want to be like him!" Alfred cut in. Ivan fell silent for a moment and Alfred sighed. "Ivan, I understand. I could see it in their faces that they wanted you to kill him, but I hoped you wouldn't. You say you are not your father, but killing someone without hesitation is exactly the kind of thing he would do!"

"But you saw how the peasants reacted to me!" Ivan snapped. "They didn't think I could do it, just like the court! I don't want to be my father, but the man I want to be is someone who will be murdered by them!"

"They are your people and they should respect you, but killing is not the way to get it!" Alfred returned. "You can prove yourself and be the kind of ruler your wish to be without killing! And no one is going to murder you, they saw what you could do and they know to fear to you. You are a new king in a new era. Don't let them belittle you."

"I… You are right, but it will not be easy to win against the court."

"We will win if we stay strong, Vanya."

Ivan nodded his head then moved to hold Alfred's hand. "If you say so, My Queen."

Alfred had a smile grace his lips as he said, "I do."

* * *

**Translations:** moye solnyshko - my sunshine **  
**

 

 *****First off...** I AM SO FUCKIN SORRY THIS TOOK SO DAMN LONG!!! Second... I hope yall guys liked it and plan on sticking around for more! It's slow going but Imma finish this, believe you me! I only let one fic go unfinished but that's never happening again! Anyway, from here on out things are going to be getting serious and brutal! Frankly, I'm excited as shit to finally get to the good stuff and I hope yall are too! Thank you all the comments and Kudos so far!!

 ******* Also **Tips for Fics** is greatly appreciated! https://www.ko-fi.com/quinten


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 11**

୨.❀.୧

Days had passed since the incident in the courtroom, but the repercussions were just what Ivan had expected, much to Alfred's dismay. The peasants lessened their judgment of their new king; the Court began to respect his decisions. Ivan was still kept in the study with the Court, searching for ways to help the kingdom's stability issues, but he wasn't pressured as badly as before. His threat had been heard clearly by all of the kingdom and no one was willing to test him. They had feared Ivan when he was a child who killed at his father command, and now they feared him as their sovereign. They knew Ivan wasn't the same as his younger self, but that only added more caution into their actions and choice of words.

Alfred still wished that Ivan could have handled the thief differently. Before, he could see the distrust in their eyes whenever they looked his way, but now they regarded him with caution and avoided him when possible. He wanted to be respected and trusted, a friend to the people like his mother. She was beloved in Sunre—giving mercy and sympathy to those who deserved it, helping schoolmasters teach the children, and always brightened up a room wherever she went. But here, a queen was meant to provide children and balance, but Alfred couldn't even do that. He had let the King take a life without saying a word until it was too late. Even if Ivan promised to not kill anyone else unless Alfred allowed it, that didn't give him much peace. As for children, that was still uncertain. He had read about it, but of course that wasn't much of a comfort. It had been nearly three weeks since his heat and only five days since he last had sex with Ivan. He knew he should have showed signs by now, a change in appetite, scent, _something_.

Alfred sighed as he looked at his tea, then set down the cup with disinterest. He didn't feel much different than he did before he had his heat—sure he was a little more eager to have sex, but that was the only change he noticed.

"What will become of me?" Alfred asked the empty garden, then turned his head to look at a bush of roses.

He watched a butterfly land on a rose then watched it lift off shortly after. He let out a long sigh then moved to get up from the iron table he sat at, but upon doing so his stomach flipped. A wave of nausea crashed into him and he gripped his stomach in an effort to ease it, but it was no use. He felt bile rise in his throat and before he could even think about what was happening he bent over and retched on the grass below. The entirety of his breakfast and mid-morning tea poured out of him and landed at his feet. The stench alone made him continue to vomit until he was left dry heaving and sweaty. His stomach ached, his throat burned, and he felt like he had been run over by a horse by the time he was finished.

"Gods," he slurred as he wiped his mouth with a napkin.

He felt light headed as he stood there and he desperately wanted to lay down, but nowhere near the mess he made. He moved shakily through the gardens and back to the castle, but he didn't make it all the way. He was walking up the path and saw the gardeners working. He must have said something to alert them because they rushed to his side as he collapsed.

୨.❀.୧

****

"If we mine in the mountains to the north then we should find more valuable minerals, perhaps even gold. We will just need to set up a settlement of sorts so miners can survive the—"

"Sire! Sire!"

Ivan fell silent and looked up from the map he and the Owletan Court huddled over as he heard the frantic voice.

"Yes? You may enter," Ivan called out and a servant burst into the study.

"I-I'm sorry, Sire, but the Queen—he's collapsed!"

Ivan felt fear grip his throat and heart and quickly walked up to the servant and grabbed her by her shoulders.

"Where is he? What happened to him?"

"The doctor awaits you in your chambers—"

Ivan fell deaf to anything else the servant had to say. He let go of her and raced off to his bed chambers gripped by anxious fear.

"What is going on?" he demanded once he saw the doctor outside his door.

"My King, I need your permission to examine him," the beta asked as he tightened his grip on his medical bag.

Ivan didn't hesitate to give the order and the doctor nodded his head quickly, before rushing into the room with Ivan in tow. Ivan took his place beside the bed and looked at the whimpering blonde.

"Ivan?" Alfred asked as he smelled the familiar alpha nearby.

"I am here, my love," Ivan assured and dropped down to his knees as he took hold of Alfred's hands. "The doctor is here and will heal you. Do not worry."

Alfred whined softly as he felt his nausea torment him and a headache take over.

"My Queen, this may feel a bit cold," the doctor said, though Alfred didn't pay much mind so he was surprised when chilled metal cylinder slid inside of him and stretched him open. Ivan internally cringed as this beta touched his Queen so intimately, but remained focused on the situation at hand. If the doctor saw it necessary to cure Alfred this way, then so be it.

Alfred tightened his hold on Ivan's hand as the doctor put two fingers inside of his gaping ass. It was odd having someone else touch him and he wished it would stop. Ivan could smell the discomfort wafting from Alfred and found himself growling in irritation.

"Doctor, tell me what you—"

"He is pregnant."

Ivan froze and Alfred sighed in relief as the doctor removed his fingers and then the cold device.

"What?" Ivan asked in shock.

The doctor redressed Alfred then stood fully to look at the royals.

"He is pregnant. The nausea, light headedness, and headaches are common symptoms for many things. I assumed he might be pregnant and when I placed my fingers in his birth canal I could feel the membrane between his womb and anal cavity was closed off. It's only that way when an omega is pregnant."

Ivan stared at the doctor for a while longer then looked at Alfred's stomach. There was currently life growing in there and as it heaved and bounced Ivan moved his eyes up further to see Alfred crying.

"I'm pregnant." He croaked. "I'm—I'm glad."

"Everyone leave," Ivan ordered without looking away from Alfred.

As soon as the room was empty, Ivan joined Alfred on the bed. The second he was partially seated Alfred clung to him and cried harder. The feeling of nausea subsided, and although his headache still persisted, he didn't care. He felt so overwhelmed yet relieved to know he wasn't gravely ill, but instead was carrying a child. Something wet drip on his forehead and he looked up to see tears falling down Ivan's cheeks. Ivan raised a hand to cradle Alfred's face as the tears continued to flow. Alfred realize then how much he had worried Ivan and he smiled weakly. He tugged on Ivan's vest to make him come closer to him and pressed a kiss to his trembling lips as an apology.

"I love you."

Ivan felt his world come to a stop and Alfred felt unable to breathe as he realized what had happened. They stared at each other's tearful eyes widened with surprise.

"You, love me?" Ivan asked in a whisper.

Alfred stared at Ivan for a while longer as he thought about what to say. For so long he had been uncertain of his feelings, uncertain that he could ever say "I love you", and now, in a moment of pure overwhelming emotion he had said it. The words didn't feel heavy on his tongue and the doubt he had always felt was no longer there. Alfred opened his mouth in silent awe then closed it as he looked at the longing in Ivan's eyes.

"I-I know I'm rather late in saying this, but I… I always felt doubtful, scared even, which is… unclear to me now, but… Ivan, I—I love you," Alfred said tasting the words again. "I love you," he said once more with a soft smile coming to his tear stained face.

Ivan was at a loss for words but the need to do something was making him restless. He felt like he could jump for joy, shout from the tallest tower, but instead he smashed his lips against Alfred's and kissed him breathless.

"I have waited so long to hear you say that," Ivan said as he panted softly. "I love you, Alfred."

"I'm sorry to have kept you waiting," Alfred said as he regained his breath, but it was quickly lost as Ivan smothered him in kisses again.

Ivan couldn't contain himself for much longer and pulled Alfred into his lap. They kissed each other eagerly as they got comfortable and only stopped when Alfred felt how hard Ivan was. It made him moan at feeling the erection press into his backside and he looked at Ivan with need in his eyes. Ivan knew just how Alfred felt and didn't put up a fight when the other started to undo his pants. He raised his hips so Alfred could push his pants down to his ankles, along with his underwear, and hissed softly when Alfred gave his cock a teasing rub.

"Hurry, Alfred," Ivan ordered as the blond continued to tease him.

Alfred gave a smirk but did as told. He was eager to move along as well. He got off of Ivan's lap and quickly stripped his lower half and climbed back on. He grabbed Ivan's cock and placed it at his hole, which was still loose from the doctor's device. He slide down Ivan's shaft with ease, the slick he produced was more than enough for the job.

"Gods," Alfred whimpered as he become fully seated.

Ivan placed his hands on Alfred's hip and pulled him forward to give him another set of kisses. Alfred gasped softly as Ivan lavished his neck and moved his hands down to rest on top of Ivan's. He squeezed them gently as he uttered the nickname he'd given his love.

" _Vanya_."

Ivan ceased his actions and looked up at his blushing queen. Alfred took that chance to kiss Ivan hotly, stealing Ivan's breath and making him moan. When the kiss ended Alfred whispered into Ivan's ear, "I love you." Ivan groaned in response and wrapped his arms around him. Alfred hugged Ivan back, wrapping his arms around his neck and nuzzling his face into his hair.

"Say it again," Ivan whispered, eager to hear those words he had longed for.

"I love you, Vanya." Alfred said happily, a smile on his lips. He then pulled back, sinking back down on Ivan's shaft and placed a hand on Ivan's cheek. He held Ivan's head up to look him in the eyes as he began to rock gently on the cock inside of him. Ivan's pale face was already a shade of pink, but now it was bright red as he stared at his love.

"You will be the death of me," Ivan murmured.

Alfred chuckled at hearing that and moved his hips a little slower to tease his king. Ivan growled from the change in pace and moved his own hands to push and pull Alfred, making him go faster. Alfred moaned as Ivan tried to take control, and realized that perhaps teasing wasn't the best move. He moved his hips with Ivan's movements, the two of them eager to find release. Words of love and praise was shared between them as they rocked together, getting closer and closer to their climax.

"Alfred—I, I can't—"

"Me too!"

Ivan bucked sharply shoving his knot inside, and sending a shiver up Alfred's spine as well as a scream of pleasure past his lips.

"Oh gods, oh gods! Vanya, I love you I love you I love you I lo—AAAAAAHHH!"

Alfred arched his back and held onto Ivan's arms tightly as he finally came. His cock throbbed as he spilled ribbons of cum between them. Ivan growled Alfred's name as he watched this and came instantly. When they were spent Alfred fell into Ivan, making them both sink into the pillows that supported them.

"I love you," Alfred mumbled.

"I love you too," Ivan replied.

Ivan rubbed his hand along Alfred's back making the other hum in appreciation. When the knot eventually loosened Alfred gently pulled away and moved to lay his back on top of Ivan's chest. They laid in the bed for the rest of the evening, watching the sun move through the mountains. Enjoying each other's company and the new life forming between them.

"Do you think it will be a boy or a girl?" Alfred suddenly asked.

Ivan hummed to the question and moved his hand from Alfred's hip to his stomach.

"A girl."

"Really?" Alfred asked raising an eyebrow.

"Yes." Ivan said simply. "Do you think otherwise?"

Alfred paused for a moment to think then shook his head.

"No, it's just… I thought you might have wanted a son to be your first born."

" _Our_ first born," Ivan corrected, then went on to say, "I have no preference, moye solnyshko."

"Alright then, but what of names?" Alfred asked as he placed his own hand on top of Ivan's that still lingered on his stomach. "One for a girl and one of a boy, just in case."

"Perhaps, Valentina, for a girl?" Ivan suggested, but Alfred had a skeptical look on his face. "Or maybe, Lada." Ivan answered and looked down to see Alfred smiling.

"Lada…" Alfred said softly. "I like that a bit more."

Ivan smiled at getting approval and kissed the top of Alfred's head.

"Why don't you chose a boy's name?" Ivan suggested.

Alfred nodded his head slightly then hummed softly as he thought about it.

"Aaron."

"A strong name," Ivan commented. "Lada and Aaron, or Valentina."

Alfred let out a soft laugh but nodded his head. "Sounds good, doesn't it?"

"They're perfect."

* * *

**Translations:**

moye solnyshko - my sunshine

 *****Welp** hope yall enjoyed this chapter! The next chapter is finished but i wont post it just yet. I want this chapter to sink into your hearts and I also still need to edit the new chapter  >:3c Thanks for the support so far!*


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Waring: Minor Character Death

**Chapter 12**

୨.❀.୧

Alfred stood before his mirror staring at the image it reflected. He looked just as he always had—deep tan skin littered with freckles on his faces, an average build of muscle and fat, but now there was an addition. Where the slight chub around his hips rested was an added weight. A small dome protruding from his stomach, and unlike the fat he was used to, it wasn't soft. This was his womb, and inside was his first child. The fact that he could visibly see the sign of pregnancy made his doubts fade, but worries rise.

For the past few months he wondered if he really was pregnant, or if the doctor had just been mistaken. He couldn't believe all the sickness he felt was really caused by a baby forming inside of him. It never felt real. But now, now he had proof staring right back at him. The baby was in him, it was there, and that meant he needed to be cautious. He needed to be mindful of his steps so he wouldn't trip, would have to be careful riding his horse, would need to be more aware of his surroundings so not to get injured, and now that it was getting colder he couldn't take the risk of getting sick. This seemed simple, but Alfred knew he was a bit clumsy at times and he never really liked dressing warmly.

Alfred sighed as he looked at the bump and placed a hand on it gently. He was pregnant and the father was a man he would have never thought to be with—a man that had worked past his defenses and managed to snatch his heart. He had feared that he'd be in a hateful relationship and just being used to breed, but his fears had been laid to rest. Now after being with Ivan for five months he could honestly say that he loved him and felt at peace. Sure, he wished certain things could be different and knew that challenges were still to come, but he felt confident that he'd be fine, that they would be fine. And the challenge of having of this baby would be a welcome one.

A smile came to Alfred's face as he looked from the reflection to his stomach. However a chill tickled goosebumps onto his skin, reminding him that he had been naked from his bath for far too long. He threw on some clothes and dried his hair, then opened the door and almost walked straight into Eduard.

"My lords!" he gasped.

"Sorry My Queen, I hadn't meant to startle you," he said quickly.

"It's alright," Alfred said as he steadied his beating heart. "Does Ivan need me?"

Eduard nodded. "He is waiting for you in the dining hall, along with your family. They have just arrived."

Alfred's face lit up instantly at the news and it took all his strength to not run to them. He hadn't seen his family since the wedding and he had been eagerly awaiting for their arrival. Ivan had thought it would be a good idea to invite them to the castle for a dinner in honor of their unborn child. The news of their child had already been announced to the other kingdoms far and wide. The result of that had been a plethora of gifts addressed to the child.

"Mother! Father!" Alfred shouted the second he laid eyes on them. The royal pair still looked the same and greeted Alfred with open arms.

"My son!" "How are you?" Arthur and Francine asked as they hugged Alfred then let him go.

"Just fine." Alfred beamed. "I have—"

"Do I not get a hug?" came a sudden voice and Alfred turned to see his twin. Matthew seemed to have gotten taller in just the few months they were apart, but they still shared the same face.

"Mattie!" Alfred quickly went to smother his brother and Matthew laughed as he accepted his fate.

Ivan watched all of this from the sidelines, amazed at the dynamic of Alfred's family. A part of him felt jealous, as childish as that was.

"My King." Ivan turned to see his cook Toris standing beside him. "Dinner is ready and the table is set."

Ivan nodded in thanks then addressed the sunny guests in his home.

"King Arthur, Queen Francis, and Prince Matthew, dinner is ready."

The royals quieted down and went to take their seats, but that didn't last long. Alfred and Matthew teased and bickered with each other, while Francine tried to calm them and get more details of the baby from Alfred and Ivan. Arthur tried to calm them all down by being louder than them while also having a civilized conversation with Ivan. The family had certainly grown more comfortable in Ivan's presence, and Ivan was thankful for it. He could feel the jealousy fading as he realized that this was his family as well, although he wasn't quite sure how to handle them.

The dinner went on loudly but as plates were filled and cups were emptied, things became relaxed. It was also this moment that Matthew asked for everyone's attention.

"I have some news I'd like to share as well," he said happily.

Alfred set down his cup with intrigue and Matthew just smiled wider.

"I will be getting married next month. I have chosen my love, and it's Catalina."

Everyone gasped at the news and Francine was quick to have tears come to her eyes.

"Oh my child! How dare you keep such news quiet for so long!" she scolded.

Matthew blushed and shrugged his shoulders. "I'm sorry. I was going to say so sooner, but then Alfred's invitation came!"

Alfred laughed at hearing that but then fell silent as he realized it made his stomach hurt. He placed a hand on his stomach, but the pain wouldn't ease.

"Are you alright Alfred?" Ivan asked as he noticed the change in Alfred's demeanor.

"I'm fine. I think I just ate too much."

"Oh, you must feel ill," Francine said. "I remember getting sick after eating just a little bit of food when I was pregnant."

Alfred gave a hum to that and took a deep breath, but something still didn't feel right.

"I—I need to—"

Alfred cut himself off as he got up from his chair abruptly. He felt like he was going to vomit, but the pain in his stomach was still there. He didn't know what was going on but he felt light headed the second he got up. He tried to take a step but found himself falling.

"Alfred!"

He didn't know who shouted for him but he felt someone catch him. It smelt like Ivan, but he wasn't sure, nothing made sense, but the pain and nausea did. He couldn't bare it any long and found himself vomiting right then and there. It burned more than the previous times and before he could say anything about it everything went black.

୨.❀.୧

_Alfred had no idea what was going on but he was sitting in a rocker. He sat in his bedroom, rocking away with a bundle of warmth in his arms. Something about it made him feel happy and he looked down to see that a baby without a face was looking up at him. He stared at it as the faceless child began to drain of color, pink fading to grey and green. Alfred wanted to throw away the hideous thing, but his arms wouldn't move. The child wilted like a flower in his arms and the smell of rotting flesh permeated the air. Alfred couldn't take it and cried out in fear and helplessness._

He thrashed his arms about, but stopped instantly when a burning pain came from his stomach and strong arms wrapped around him tightly.

"Alfred, calm down! Alfred!"

Alfred went completely still when he heard this voice through the frantic sound of his breathing and racing thoughts. He realized that everything around him was a haze, meaning that his glasses were gone, but he could tell that Ivan was the one holding him. He felt calmer instantly when he realized this, but then the pain in his stomach got his attention once more.

"Where are my glasses?" Alfred asked hoarsely. Silence was Alfred's response, which only made him more agitated. "Where are my glasses, Ivan?"

Ivan opened his mouth to speak but let out a defeated sigh instead. He let go of Alfred, albeit reluctantly, and grabbed Alfred's glasses from the bedside table. He handed them over and Alfred slipped them on quickly then looked at Ivan. The man looked ragged, like he had exhausted all of his energy in a fight, even though there was no sign of one, just bloodshot eyes and unkempt hair. Alfred moved to turn towards Ivan fully as he said, "What's going—Ah!" a flare of pain came from Alfred's stomach when he moved and he laid back on the pillows to ease it. It was then that he remembered that unbearable pain he felt on the night of the dinner. The way his body felt like it was burning from the inside and the smell of vomit. Alfred looked down at his stomach and gripped the night gown he was dressed in.

"Don't…"

Alfred shot Ivan a wild look at hearing the weak plea. Something was terribly wrong, he could feel it, not just emotionally, but physically he yanked on the nightgown bunching it up to his chest. What laid underneath was bandages wrapped tightly around his abdomen and spots of blood peeking through in the shape of a crescent moon. The sight of it had tears burning in Alfred's eyes and his vision began to blur.

"Wh-What happened… to me?" Alfred asked in shock. He reached a tentative hand to his stomach and felt nothing but tender flesh on a flat stomach. Alfred's breath hitched as tears began to spill, his fingers digging into the bandaged wound. "What happened to me?" he asked again, his voice strained then looked up to Ivan who stood stalk still. _"What happened?"_

Ivan had tears fall as Alfred yelled, but he cleared his tightening throat as much as he could to give his love an answer.

"Some—someone poisoned your drink." He croaked. "It…It was a slow poison, which allowed you to survive, but…"

"The baby."

Ivan looked up at Alfred then. His voice had come out sounding so empty, so chilling, but Alfred's face twisted into rage and sadness as his let out a heart wrenching cry. The tears that gradually fell from Ivan increased as he watched Alfred scream and cry for their loss. They had been so excited to their first born and now someone had snatched them away. Ivan had cried just as Alfred was just days before. He had broken everything in his study and wept for three days until Alfred awoke. He felt like a completely failure. He failed to protect his Queen, failed to protect his child, and failed to protect his kingdom. How could an assassin slip into his kingdom, into his home, and take his unborn child? He had been careless, too trusting…

_'The others may seem friendly… but that will be your undoing.'_

The words of the deceased king filled Ivan's head and he looked over his shoulder to see nothing there. Ivan clenched his fists as he felt anger worm into his heart.

"I'm sorry," he whispered through clenched teeth. "I'm sorry."

Alfred sniffled and hiccupped as his crying quieted down. He fell back into the pillows and stared at the ceiling as he heard Ivan muttered apology after apology.

"What could you have done?" Alfred found himself asking.

Ivan fell silent then dropped to his knees beside the bed.

"I… I could have placed more guards around the castle. I could have placed guards in the kitchen. I could have—"

"There was nothing you could do," Alfred stated, his eyes never leaving the ceiling.

"But Alfred—"

"Ivan, our child is gone! Someone, somehow, slipped past the guards we had posted and took away our baby!" Alfred shouted then choked on a sob.

Ivan gritted his teeth and gripped the bedding that draped over the side of the bed. He wanted to hold Alfred instead, but didn't feel worthy of it.

"I will avenge our child."

"How?"

"The night you fainted a stable boy found the assassin trying to leave through the servants' quarters. He was captured, but he has yet to speak."

Alfred stared off into nothing, silence filling between them. Ivan felt his heart breaking as he looked up shyly at his love. Ivan attempted to reach out to him once more, but he paused when Alfred suddenly took in a shaky breath and said, "Torture him."

Ivan stared in disbelief. Never in his life had he thought he'd heard those words from Alfred, but the Alfred before him was broken. His radiant glow, sparkling eyes, never ending smile… all of it was gone. Ivan knew the look well on Alfred's face for he had lived most of his life with it.

"Alfred—"

"Do it!" Alfred cut in. "Make him feel my pain. He should speak then."

Ivan stared at Alfred, who still didn't meet his gaze. He wanted to think of some other way, but a large part of him sided with Alfred.

"Very well."

Ivan looked at Alfred with longing and worry, but didn't touch him or speak another word. He got up silently and left their bedroom. Once the door closed behind Ivan, Alfred found himself crying uncontrollably. He had no thoughts in his head, just a pain in his chest and stomach as he cried until sleep took him, but his tears still spilled as he slept.

* * *

 *****This** is the chapter that started this whole story. This is what I've been wanting to write all this time! Feel the pain! FEEL IT! Anyway, comments welcome and see yall next time :D


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